A few months later Julian Stevens entered his life, saving him in more ways than one and became his new caseworker. In the beginning, Stephen refused to talk to Julian because he didn’t know if he could trust him. His first caseworker did not listen when he tried to explain what was happening to him. No one questioned why he was losing weight when they were given three square meals a day or why such a frail child had large bags under his eyes.
At meal times, he only got scraps of food because the other kids would take his meal from him. If one of the other kids tried to help him, they would be bullied and later turned a blind eye when the other boys would start bullying him again. At night, while the evening manager slept, a few of the kids would take turns beating the shit out of him.
He would cry out for help, and the kids would cover his mouth and hold him down, laughing at him. The director ignored him and told him he needed to toughen up and stop tattling on everyone. It was a time that haunted his dreams still, even as an adult. Two years earlier, he was working on a case that brought up the memories he tried to forget. He’d pushed Julian away purposely when he would visit him in the group home. But Julian pushed back and visited him every day and talked with him, even though he hadn’t spoken a word.
Six months, that’s how long it took Stephen to open up to Julian. Julian had earned his trust to where whenever he left, Stephen would cry because he wanted to go home with him. And, it seemed, Julian felt the same way and adopted him. During that time, Stephen had also met Nick Young, Julian’s lover. Nick was just as patient with Stephen as Julian was, waiting for him to feel comfortable enough to speak to him. It took about one year to complete everything before Julian and Nick could adopt and take Stephen. The boys home was closed down not long after he was adopted and the staff members sent to prison on charges of neglect.
A few months after Julian and Nick adopted him, they got married. Uncle Tucker was Nick’s best friend and work partner. Stephen loved his adoptive parents and was devastated when Nick was killed while working on an undercover case. Stephen was fifteen when his dad Nick died. Julian never remarried, he’d always say Nick was the love of his life. Stephen went through a rebellious stage after losing his father. If it wasn’t for his uncle and his dad that didn’t give up on him, Stephen wasn’t sure how his life would have turned out. He admired Nick and his uncle so much that once he got his head on straight, he knew he wanted to follow in his father and uncle’s footsteps and work for the FBI.
After graduating from high school, Stephen attended university. He worked his ass off taking on more credits and got his bachelor’s degree in criminology before applying to the FBI Academy. Julian was not happy with his career choice but supported him. He had been an agent for less than three years when he met Brenden. Stephen looked over to the driver’s seat and saw that his dad was paying attention to the road and not him. His face still flushed hotly when he remembered the first time he and Brenden met as if it was yesterday.
It was lust at first sight, even though they started on the wrong foot—well on his end, anyway. Stephen had walked into the Chicago FBI office ready for work and bumped into a hard wall of muscles and ended up spilling the cup of coffee he was carrying in his hand all over his new suit.
Stephen had never been one to hold his tongue and let out a string of curses that would have made a sailor blush. Even through his anger, Stephen’s eyes traveled from the massive muscles neatly packed inside of his suit, up to the sensuous lips, landing on the greenest eyes he had ever seen. Bright sparkling jewels that would shine in the darkest room. The moment Brenden spoke with his deepBarry Whitevoice Stephen fell instantly in lust.
The car stopped in front of the three-story house, pulling Stephen out of his musings. He couldn’t dwell on the past anymore, it was time to stay in the present and not think about what used to be. He and Brenden were over for good. Even if they developed a friendship because of Nicholas, Stephen didn’t expect Brenden to forgive him, not yet at least.
Stephen got out of the car and watched as Nicholas ran to the front of the home he bought when he moved there. Julian had always wanted to be closer to his brother, ever since they’d lost their older sister in a car accident due to a drunk driver. Tucker lost not only his sister but also his wife and daughter in one day. Julian was also willing to move because he refused to be separated from his grandson.
Family was very important to his father; he didn’t want to lose anyone else. They all got out of the car and opened the door to their home. Poppin, the puppy Nicholas insisted they’d get, ran up to greet him. Stephen stepped around the two, heading up the stairs to change out of his work clothes. His dad went to the kitchen to check on what to make for dinner.
He closed the door to his bedroom and slouched against the door, breathing a sigh of relief for the first time that day. Being in the same space as Brenden had his defenses working overtime. The only time he could relax was when he was out of the office, far away from Brenden’s probing eyes. Stephen wasn’t supposed to start for a couple more days, but he wanted to meet a few of the team members he will work with. He also picked out his desk, even though his uncle told him he could get an office.
The entire time he was there he’d felt Brenden’s eyes peering at the back of his head from the second the man walked into the office. He dared himself not to turn around and look at the other man. They didn’t speak to each other, for the short time that Brenden was in the office. The scowl on Brenden’s face basically told him to stay the fuck away. Stephen promised not to force Brenden into a relationship with Nicholas, but he could not help to wonder what his ex-lover was thinking.
Stephen pulled away from the door and walked into the bathroom, taking off his clothes as he went. He stood in front of the sink and turned on the faucet, cupping his hands under the cool running water, he splashed it on his face. He was feeling flushed and needed to cool off. Reaching for the towel hanging on the hook and drying his face, he opened his eyes and looked into the mirror. He hated the color of his hair or the way he looked. He’d needed to dye his hair for the last case he worked before moving to Providence.
His boss had ordered him to share his looks. He’d wanted Stephen to mix in with the crowd as one of the janitors working at an art museum. He had to find out who was using the museum to smuggle drugs using priceless art. The job took less than a month for Stephen to figure out who was in charge and what was going on before he involved his team.
Seeing a small bit of new growth, Stephen opened the cabinet beside the mirror, he took out his electric shaver, turning it on and brought it to the middle of his hair. With each blond strand falling to the floor, he was feeling more like himself. Stephen loved his job and like any agent dedicated to their work, he would do what it took while working on a case. While working his last case, he was injured while fighting with the unsub and was cut on his left thigh, which had required him to receive a few stitches. He returned home the same day after getting a clean bill of health and some other news. News that pushed him to accept his uncle’s job offer. As much as Brenden hated secrets, Stephen did as well. Yet, he’d done just that by keeping Nicholas away from his father.
He hated lying to his son each time he asked about his other parent. Stephen had tried to explain to his son he liked boys and not girls and that he had two dads and not a mom and a dad. The only thing that Nicholas cared about, was when would he meet his other dad? Stephen tried not to lie to his son, but skirted around the truth and explained to his son that his father was busy with work, and when he got the chance, he would visit. Stephen groaned as he shaved the last bit of hair from his head. He was a bastard, part of not telling Brenden about Nicholas was because he was angry. It hurt to know he was the only one in love, and the one thinking about a future between them.
He still hadn’t let go of all the anger he held on to for so long. Seeing and working with Brenden a few months ago also did not help. But he also saw what secrets could do. It tore Ethan and Tyler apart. Stephen placed the shaver down and stared at himself in the mirror. Doubt shown in his eyes, but in his heart, he knew he’d finally done the right thing. Brenden needed the chance to know his son. And he would not stand in the way.
** ** ** ** **
Stephen was sitting on the couch drinking a cup of herbal tea. Nicholas was already tucked into bed after Stephen had read his favorite bedtime story to him. He loved being a father. There were days Stephen was too tired to play with Nicholas, who required a lot of attention at his age, but he wouldn’t trade his time with his son for nothing else in the world. He was more than appreciative for his dad, but missed having a lover. He mentally groaned. From the moment they met, Brenden was always his kryptonite. He loved Brenden and always would. He gave up hope that he’d one day get over the other man and move on with his life. That was a reason he’d stayed away for so long using Nicholas as an excuse.
Fuck, I’m an idiot. What was I thinking? I was offered a promotion in my department. But no, I turned it down. For what? To have Brenden growl at me because he’s still pissed at me. I’m a real idiot. He broke my fucking heart too. I wanted us to be together, and all he wanted was a warm body.
“What are you thinking about?” Julian asked.
Stephen looked over to the seat next to him. His father was watching him intently. “Nothing,” he lied.
“Don’t lie to me, you keep sighing over there.” His brow furrowed in concern. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, Dad, just wondering if I made the right decision. I know what I said earlier tonight. But now I’m wondering if maybe you were right, and I rushed my decision. I should have taken the promotion; I would have been one of the youngest in the bureau to be the head of a department.” Stephen placed his empty cup of tea on the coffee table in front of him.
His father hummed. “You could have,” he said. “How many times has Nick asked you if his other dad will be able to find us because we moved?”
Stephen groaned covering his face. “At least three times tonight, and that was before he got out of the bathtub,” he answered.
Stephen felt a gentle hand touch his shoulder. He raised his head and looked at his dad. “A month ago, when we first moved here I would have stuck with my answer that we should have stayed in Chicago. Yeah, you would have been promoted, and you still have the opportunity here.”
“Yeah, if others don’t see it as me getting a leg up because of who my uncle is,” Stephen interrupted. “It’s one of the reasons I held out for so long.”
“But,” Julian continued. “To tell you the truth, I’m getting real tired hearing my grandson ask for his dad and hearing you coming up with excuses. They’re starting to blend together why he’s not here with us.”
