Isit going to be a date or just two friends hanging out?Lucas asked himself that question over the past couple of days.Do I want it to be a date? Maybe I’m reading too much into a kind gesture.
He’d agreed to it without thinking, but the second he hung up the phone he couldn’t help wondering. They’d talked regularly and about everything under the sun and moon. He’d told Tucker things he couldn’t remember telling his brothers.
Lucas opened up about what he was going through after losing Rebecca, and it was good to talk to someone and not hearing the pity in their voice. Tucker understood where he was coming from since he lost his own wife. Lucas felt terrible that Tucker had lost his daughter, wife, and sister on the same day. He couldn’t imagine what his life would be like if he’d lost Zoi and Rebecca on the same day or even one of his brothers.
Lucas was also starting to realize that he was excited as a kid when he spoke to Tucker. He loved hearing his deep throaty laughter or the way he’d say Lucas’ name. He imagined the bright smile on Tucker’s face when he smiled or the way his eyes sparkled when he was trying to hold something back like he’d done many times over the weekend he’d practically kidnapped the other man.
Tucker was handsome in a way that most women would call roguish and sexy, not to mention the five-o’clock shadow he sported over the weekend had only added to his sex appeal. And his full lips looked soft and Lucas wondered just how kissable they were. His eyes widened at that thought.
Oh, shit. Can I really be attracted to Tucker? Wait! Is he even attracted to me? Oh, fuck, what the hell am I thinking? Tucker sees me as nothing but a friend. But do I want him to see me as more?
That last question stumped him, and he didn’t know how to answer it, really. The other night he’d practically rushed out of his parents’ home to be alone with the man.
* * *
“What’s your problem?”Tyler asked.
“Yeah, you have this look on your face like you're constipated,” Christen said to him. “Are you all right?” he asked worriedly.
“Ah, yeah, I’m fine,” he mumbled.
Christen had driven down to spend the day with him and Tyler for a brother bonding day they sometimes did. Since it was the weekend, Ethan was watching Zoi for him and Christen left the triplets home with Jaxson. Lucas looked at his two brothers who were both happy and married with children. When Christen came out to the family, he was a teenager, and soon after, Tyler told everyone he was bisexual. Lucas didn’t think or look at his brothers differently when they came out.
Am I bisexual?He didn’t think his family would look at him any differently, to him who you love is who you love.
Sure, same-sex couples was an acceptable part of society, but there were still assholes out there that had a problem with two men or two women being together. But there was one thing he’d wanted to ask his brothers. In a relationship between a man and woman, the man usually topped but when it came to two guys, who decided what. If he and Tucker ever got to or close to that kind of relationship could he let Tucker fuck him?
“Does Jaxson ever let you fuck him?” he asked Christen not pausing or taking the time to consider where they were. And then turned and looked at Tyler and asked, “What about you, do you let Ethan fuck you?”
Christen spit out the gulp of soda he’d just taken all over the table, and Tyler started choking on the bite of sandwich he’d just taken. Lucas reached over and started patting his brother’s back gently as he did with Zoi when she drank something too fast.
“Are you all right?” Tyler nodded. Lucas sat back down then leaned back in his chair and looked at his brothers waiting for their answers. They were both staring at him as if he’d lost his marbles. “What?” he asked.
“Don’t 'what' us, what kind of question is that?” Christen stage whispered.
“What the hell is going on with you?” Tyler asked. “Why the hell would you ask us something like that?”
“What the fuck do you mean by that?” Lucas looked between his brothers and wondered if he’d crossed the line or something. They’d always been close, and nothing was off-limits to them. “Fuck, you know what, forget I asked,” he said and got up, taking his trash with him before either of his brothers could stop him. If anything was going to happen between him and Tucker, he’d have to figure things out for himself.
* * *
“We’re versatile,”Tyler said, and Lucas looked away from the document he’d been staring at for the past ten or so minutes.
“What are you talking about?” Lucas asked him.
After walking out of the restaurant, he wasn’t in the right mind to pick up his daughter, feeling irritated he decided to get some work done and stopped by his office. After thinking about it, he realized he understood his brothers’ reaction. But he was curious and figured they were the best ones to ask. He also wondered how Tyler knew he was there but didn’t bother to ask.
“Ethan and I,” he said walking into Lucas’ office, sitting down in the chair in front of his desk. “Sometimes we like to switch things up even though Ethan likes being on the bottom. But there are times I need to feel him inside of me, to remind me that I’m his and he wants me just as much as I want him.”
“Thanks for telling me that,” Lucas told him. It was beautiful to hear that his brother was willing to submit to his husband out of need and not because he had to.
“My question for you is why?” Tyler said to him.
“Why what?”
“Why did you ask that question? And don’t give me one of your Lucas-isms,” Tyler said. “Just tell me the truth.”
“Lucas-isms, what the hell do you mean by that?”
