He smiles. “I live to take risks.”
He hands me one of the tubs like it’s precious cargo. Our fingers brush and I very much ignore the tingle that causes.
He looks around my flat. Takes it in. The coffee table. The folded sofabed. The calendar. The suspiciously tidy everything.
“Cosy,” he says.
“That’s one word for it.”
He perches on the edge of the sofa while I grab spoons. Time to eat straight from the tubs like adults who have given up pretending otherwise.
“So,” I say, after a mouthful. “How’s your ODD?”
He freezes. Spoon halfway to his mouth. “My what?”
“ODD,” I repeat. “Overly Dramatic Dick.”
He chokes. Actually chokes.
I thump his back once, entirely too aware of how solid he feels under my hand. “You alright?”
He coughs, then laughs, breathless. “Christa. That is… wow.”
“Accurate though.”
He exhales and shakes his head. “I went to therapy. Ivy gave me Pee-Pee’s details.”
“Oh, the infamous Phyllis Philpott. If she ever finds out Ivy calls her Pee-Pee, she will probably black list her for life,” I giggle. “So… did Pee-Pee fix your penis?”
He snorts. “No. It seems like it’s not a mechanical issue you canjust fix.”
“Shame,” I say. “I was picturing WD-40.”
He nudges my knee with his. “She suggested I date.”
I blink. “You already do that.”
“Without sex,” he adds.
I pause. Slowly lower my spoon. “Bold strategy.”
“She thinks,” he says, a little sheepish now, “that maybe I should get to know women without… pressure. A kind of bedroom ban, so to speak.”
“What is it with this woman and banning things? First Ivy, now you. But you are allowed to date?”
He laughs, rubbing a hand over his face. “In fact, she wants me to date. I’m just not taking anyone into the bedroom.”
“Technically,” I say lightly, “unless you were planning to build a blanket fort with the woman, there wouldn’t be a point of taking her to bed in the first place. ODD and all.”
There’s a beat.
Then he tips his head back and laughs. A full-bodied laugh.
“Harsh,” he says. “But fair.”
I grin, unable to help it. “I aim for accuracy.”
We sit there, legs brushing, eating ice cream far too quickly. The room feels smaller. Warmer. Like something’s settled.
