He pulls back his fist, holding it in the air above me.
“Do it. Hit me again. I deserve it.” I want him to hit me. Ineedhim to hit me.
I lost the only person who’s ever truly mattered to me. The only person I’ve ever loved. Nothing else matters to me anymore.
She asked me once if I was afraid of dying and I told her I was afraid ofnotliving. Well, if it means living without her, I don’t want it.
He searches my eyes for a beat before he drops his fist. “I’m not gonna hit you again, man,” he says with a sigh, climbing off me.
I sit up straight, wiping away a trickle of blood from my nose while he winces, his fingers brushing the split to his lip.
“I’m sorry, bro. Shouldn’t have taken it out on you,” I say.
“Won’t argue with that. I shouldn’t have hit you back.”
“Yeah, you should. I’d have lost respect for you if you hadn’t.”
He snorts a laugh. “You okay?”
“No.” my reply is instant. “I hate myself for hurting her.”
“Where is she now?”
“She’s at Sofia’s place.” There’s a tracker installed on my truck and while it was never an intentional way to keep tabs on her, it’s a small comfort to know she’s somewhere safe. But I’d be a hell of a lot more comfortable with her in my arms.
“We’ve gotta figure out a way to get your girl back. You’re meant for each other. You two are like some fucked up Romeo and Juliet.”
My head snaps up. “Didn’t they commit suicide so they wouldn’t have to live without each other? That’s pretty fucked up.”
“Whatever, man. We’re getting off topic. Fact is, we’ve gotta get you two lovebirds back together.”
I shake my head. “She hates me.”
“She hated you when you met,” he points out. “She might hate you now but she loves you too. I fuckingknowshe does.”
“Not after what I’ve done. Her face…Fuck, I—” I bow my head, biting the inside of my cheek to stop myself from crying.
He slaps a hand on my shoulder. “We’ll figure out a way. We always do. She’s your girl and she always will be.”
He’s right. Sheismy girl. There’s no one else for me.
Iwillget my girl back, no matter how long it takes and whatever obstacles I face. I never back down from a challenge.
“So, what’s this new development you mentioned in that fucking message? It better be fucking worth me losing my girl.”
“Those payments Watson’s been making? The account belonged to TobiasfuckingGrimes.”
40
“Come out with me,” Fi pleads, her hopeful eyes meeting mine through the mirror on her dresser as she applies her makeup. “It’s New Year’s Eve, you should be celebrating! It’ll do you good to get out of these four walls.”
“What do I have to celebrate, Fi? My father’s an asshole, my now-ex-boyfriend was gonna use naked pictures of me to blackmail my dad and I’m currently unemployed, crashing at my best friend’s apartment.”
The day after I found out what Killian and the guys were planning, I shot Jett a message to tell him he could shove hisjob up his ass.
She drops her blusher brush on the dresser. “Babe, I love you, but self-pityreallydoesn’t suit you. Besides, you just listed four reasons to come out with me. New Year’s is symbolic. You’re leaving the events of last year firmly in the past.”
“I appreciate you trying to help, I’d just rather sit this one out.”
