“But I’m ready to take a page out of your book.”
“How so?”
I swallow hard as I stare into her brilliant blue eyes. It feels like I’m standing at the door of an airplane about to take a giant leap of faith, all the while praying my parachute deploys. But for the first time in over a year, I refuse to let fear or guilt overpower my needs.
“I’m ready to stop living by everyone else’s rules. I’m ready to start saying yes again. I’m ready to say yes…to you.”
Then I slam my lips against hers once more.
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
ROWAN
This is completely reckless.
Not because he’s my boss.
Not because of blurred lines.
But because of the secret I’m keeping.
The letter in his office. The one I never should have read. The one that told me whose heart beats inside my chest.
I should stop this.
Tell him the truth.
Instead, as his tongue swipes against mine, I allow myself to be selfish. To drown in the way my body responds to Hayden’s kiss.
It’s exactly what I wanted to feel earlier. What I searched for with Joshua…and couldn’t find.
Now that I have, I don’t want this to end anytime soon.
Hayden backs me into the room, kicking the door shut behind him. His touch is firm and resolute. Like he’s done fighting himself.
He presses me against the wall, one hand gripping my thigh and hooking it around his waist. When he rocks against me, hard and unmistakable, a broken cry slips from my throat.
Every nerve ending feels awake, as if something long dormant just sparked back to life.
He pulls his mouth from mine and buries his face in my neck, his teeth grazing over sensitive skin. My head falls back against the wall, allowing him better access.
“I kissed him,” I pant.
The confession spills out before I can stop it.
He stills slightly, but doesn’t stop kissing me. “Is there a reason you’re telling me about kissing another man right now?” He nips at my skin, pain mixing with pleasure in an intoxicating combination.
“I just…” I close my eyes, trying to steady myself as his mouth drags lower, over my collarbone, along my scar. “I kissed him because I wanted to erase you.” I dig my fingers through his hair. “Wanted to forget what your kiss made me feel. Or maybe I hoped I’d feel the same thing with someone else.”
He lifts his head, his lips hovering just above mine. “And did you?”
I swallow, searching his eyes. “I could probably kiss a thousand men and never feel what I do when I’m with you.”
Something dark and hungry flashes across his face.Then his fingers tangle in my hair, and he claims my mouth again, deeper this time. Desperate.
“Hold on,” he murmurs roughly against my lips.
“What do you?—”
