‘You don’t treat someone the way you treated me if you love them,’ said Kitty. She dug her nails into her palms, her skin stinging.
James’s eyes dipped to the table, and his shoulders sagged. ‘I know. And I confess no amount of champagne will make up for the way I treated you.’
Kitty instinctively leaned forward a fraction. He was apologising? In the five years they’d been together, he had never apologised.
James lifted his eyes and locked Kitty with his gaze. ‘I treated you terribly. And I’m so, so sorry. From the bottom of my heart, Catherine. Please believe me.’
‘Believe you?’ said Kitty, with an eyebrow raised. ‘Believe you? You effectively kept me prisoner for the last two years of our marriage, James. You took everything from me. My friends, my family, my hobbies, my life.’
‘Your life?’ scoffed James. ‘If I’d taken your life, you wouldn’t be sitting here in front of me.’
Kitty sat back in her chair. There he was. The true James. Kitty sat up straighter. She could see right through him. His control over her was slipping.
James shook his head. ‘Sorry, sorry. You always make me do this,’ he said. ‘Nope,’ he corrected himself. ‘Nope, it’s not your fault. It’s mine.’ His face fell into what Kitty assumed was meant to be humility. ‘Catherine, I’ve had so much therapy since you left.’
‘Therapy?’ Kitty couldn’t help laughing. ‘You, in therapy?’
James lifted his hands in the air in an act of surrender. ‘I know, I know. I wouldn’t have believed it myself, but it’s true. A week after you left, I pulled myself together and decided I needed to change. I realised you left because of me. I got that it was my fault. And I’m here to make things right.’
A boyish, smiling eagerness replaced the humble face, as if he’d said his set piece and now Kitty simply had to say, Bravo, and all would be as it was.
A wave of sadness washed through her. ‘You can’t make it right, James. In time I might forgive you.’ She didn’t return his smile. ‘I’ll never be able to forget.’
‘Catherine.’ He reached across the table to her.
She refused to meet his fingers, interlocking her own on her lap as tightly as if they were padlocked.
James let out a long sigh. ‘I get it. You’re never going to believe me.’
‘Then why did you come?’ said Kitty. ‘You didn’t arrive today. You’ve been hanging around Saffron Bay for a while.’ She warmed to her accusations, tired of it all. ‘Was it to taunt me? To frighten me? Or because you’re jealous of the life I’ve created for myself here?’
‘No,’ said James. ‘That wasn’t it at all.’ He peered up at her from lowered lids. ‘I’ve come because of Rae.’
‘Rae?’ Kitty leaned forward, placing her hands on the table. James grabbed one of them. He squeezed it, and as he did so, a tear tripped from the corner of his eye down his cheek. ‘What’s wrong with Rae?’ Kitty asked.
James let out another long sigh. ‘I shouldn’t be here. I shouldn’t be telling you this. It’s not your business anymore. I just… I just… I had to talk to someone.’ James’s shoulders shook, and fat, blob-like tears dropped onto the table. Kitty had never seen James cry, not actual tears. Not like these. Other customers stared, but he didn’t seem to notice.
‘What’s happened, James?’ Her voice was tight with fear.
‘Rae… it’s Rae. She’s ill. She’s very ill.’
‘Oh my God.’ Kitty pulled her hand from James’s grasp and cupped her chin. ‘Poor Rae. What’s wrong with her?’
‘The doctors haven’t found out yet.’ He pulled a tissue from his pocket and wiped his eyes. ‘She’s been having excruciating stomach pains, and so far they’ve not been able to diagnose the cause. I’ve been going out of my mind with worry. And the thing is, Catherine… Rae’s been asking for you.’
‘For me?’ Kitty’s eyes stung with tears. She believed Rae would hate her, and she couldn’t blame her if she did.
‘Yes. She doesn’t understand why you left. She thinks you lefther.’
‘I hope you put her straight.’ He wouldn’t have, of course. Wicked stepmother.
‘I tried,’ said James. ‘Believe me. My therapist helped me work on a speech to explain things to her. She’s too young, Catherine. She doesn’t… she couldn’t understand. And now she’s ill, and I thought…’
‘You thoughtwhat?’ said Kitty. ‘I’d run into your arms? Come and play happy families again? Because trust me, James, we were never a happy family.’
‘No,’ he said. ‘No, that’s not it at all. I thought you’d want to know.’
‘And once you’d tracked me down, you couldn’t have phoned me to tell me?’
