Kai was telling me about the place they’d found, when over her shoulder I saw something strange: Alex Bain was sitting close to Cecily, his arm around her but in a possessive, domineering way…and…what was he doing?Lines of white powder were sectioned in front of him, a collection of pills nearby.
I went still as I watched them and time seemed to slow. Cecily leaned over the table, each vertebra protruding from her exposed spine. Was it me, or was there something depraved in the way Alex was watching her?
Now Daisy was with them too. My heart was racing. I wanted to go over there and yank her away.What was she thinking?
But I was frozen. My head spun. It was too hot in there.
“Woah.” A hand touched my arm, and I jumped. “Are you okay?” Kai asked.
I stared at Cecily and Alex, and then back at Kai, unsettled by the way she’d shoved something into her pocket minutes ago. I knew that some of the Sterling kids occasionally experimented with drugs, my friends included, but the amount out in the open at this party was way more than usual. There was a loud buzzing in my head. A warning. Whatever this was, I didn’t want any part of it. They could do whatever they wanted and if they got caught, their families would pick up the pieces, but if I was kicked out of school for something like this, it would ruin my life. Ruin Naomi’s.
I backed away from Kai. “Sorry—I need to go. I—”
“Maya, wait—where are you going?” she asked, but I was shoving my way toward the exit.
—
Outside, I exhaleda breath and leaned against the side of the building. It felt better to be out here, inhaling the crisp, cold air.
Pulling out my phone, I texted Lila:Is it too late to come to Terrace?
She responded right away.Not at all!So I pulled my jacket tight and ran in the direction of the eating clubs.
—
The vertically brown-stripedtudor mansion was older-looking than some of the other eating clubs, and there were three flags flying over the door—a Pride flag, a skull and crossbones, and a peace sign. As I approached, Lila came into view, waiting for me outside. She was wearing a leather jacket and dark black eye shadow that made her green eyes look even more intense. Her hair was pulled back off her face, but I noticed she’d applied more concealer over the spot on her temple. I wanted to ask her about it, but something stopped me. We weren’t that close. It felt nosy. Intrusive.
“You made it just in time,” she said excitedly. “They’re starting.”
We entered the Terrace foyer, and I was struck by how different it was from Sterling Club. The White Stripes was playing, and the pungent smell of weed floated through the air as an eclectic mix ofpeople milled about the space. We passed the living room where a guy played an acoustic guitar, and a girl with an Afro and tattoos sat on the lap of another girl, their fingers lovingly intertwined.
—
I followed Liladown a steep flight of stairs into the basement, where a band was playing. The space was small and tightly packed, the floor sticky with spilled beer, and the air humid, which made it feel even tighter and more intimate.
“That’s my friend,” Lila whispered, pointing at the girl on drums in an oversized plaid flannel. “Wooo, get it, Austin! Hell yeah,” she cheered loudly, and Austin gave her a smile.
They played a mellow alt-rock song, and a small crowd nodded to the beat. There was a guy on bass with long blue hair and a good-looking Black guy I recognized from my econ class on electric guitar.
The guitarist tossed his head back, letting his locs fall out of his eyes, and looked right at me. I felt a flicker of something before I averted my gaze. He was without a doubt the most attractive guy I’d ever seen. I studied his fingers as they moved effortlessly over the strings, trailed his strong forearms up to his broad shoulders.
I was watching the singer, a white girl with tattoos and a nose ring, as she leaned into the microphone and sang, “If I had one night with you…” when I sensed someone was watching me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw that the guy on guitar was still looking at me, and when I met his eyes, he smiled.
I felt my face flush. Every week, he sat in the back of the lecture hall and didn’t say much, but he was always early, always typing notes on his laptop. One time a few weeks ago, he’d caught me staring at him and smiled, but we’d never spoken.
As snow fell outside, and his hazel eyes held mine, I felt a thrill that I’d never felt before.
“They’re good, right?” Lila asked.
“Yeah.” I took a sip of my beer, keeping my eyes on the guitarist, who’d looked down at his fingers to focus on a complicated riff. I couldn’t take my eyes off him. The way he played, the depth and precision of his movements, it was like he was pouring his entire soulinto the song, and through the deep bass of the speakers, like it was pouring straight into me.
I pointed him out to Lila. “Do you know the guy on guitar?”
“Nate? Yeah, he’s a junior in Terrace.” She grinned as if reading my mind. “He’s really good, huh?”
—
The band finishedtheir set and were by the bar when Lila and I approached. When she saw Lila, the drummer’s face lit up, and she swooped her into a hug.
