That question only made Ophelia feel more nervous. She was positive they were all going to stop talking to her and walk out, but she had no choice.
“I was honest with you when I told you that I was betrothed to another man a couple of months ago,” she said. “A man I thought I could change. I thought that marriage and a family would make him grateful to be a husband and I would have my perfect life. You see, I loved him and never thought he would abandon me. Or mayhap I did, but I would not entertain the thought. I pretended it was not a possibility. But it was. Since we were betrothed, we behaved as married people do, in every sense of the word. When he abandoned me, he abandoned a pregnant woman. I am with child.”
The smiles were gone from the faces of the women around her. She could hardly lift her head to look at them, but she could see enough. She could see that they were looking at her, but she couldn’t really interpret their expressions. No one said anything for a moment, which made her feel like vomiting. She’d never been so ashamed, or so anxious, in her life.
“Creston knows,” she whispered tightly, feeling tears of shame sting her eyes. “It was my grandfather’s idea to marry me to a man very quickly so he might think I carried his child, even if that child was to be born early, but I could not let him do that to Creston. I told him before we were married, to give him time to break the betrothal, but he chose not to.”
It was Athdara who spoke first. “I thought this marriage seemed to happen quickly,” she said. “Now it makes sense.”
The tears were starting to leak from Ophelia’s eyes and she wiped them quickly. “Now that you know, I am certain you do not wish to waste your time on me, and I completely understand,” she said. “I just thought you should know, so there were no secrets between us if we were to be friends. Moreover, in a month or two, you would figure out that my pregnancy was more advanced than it would have been had I conceived on our wedding night or shortly thereafter. I would not insult you by lying to you about it. I believe in honesty, even if it is destructive. It is better than living a lie.”
She still had her head down and couldn’t see the wives looking at one another. It was Gisele who finally shrugged.
“This chamber needs a table,” she said, gesturing toward the window. “Some place where you can sit with Creston and share a conversation or a morning meal. Athdara, are there any small tables left in that barn?”
The women started talking about tables, and Ophelia’s head shot up. She looked at them as if they’d all just lost their minds.
“But… wait,” she said, stopping their conversation. “Did you not hear what I said?”
“We heard,” Gisele said, her dark eyes glimmering. “You loved a man and were supposed to marry him. You conceived a child. The shame is on him for walking out on you, my lady. You did nothing wrong. Had you not told Creston, I might have something else to say about it, but you did. He knows. I see no issue with this.”
Ophelia’s eyes were wide. “You don’t?”
“Nay,” Gisele said as she reached out to grasp Ophelia’s hand. “Years ago, I, too, conceived the child of a man I thought I would marry. The child was born out of wedlock because I did not marry my son’s father for about ten years, so I am in no position to cast judgment. None of us are. We all have a past, my lady. Yours is no more shameful than anyone else’s, so please put your mind at ease. But thank you for telling us. You have given us your trust and we will strive to be worthy of it.”
That brought tears again, this time of gratitude. “I do not know how to thank you,” Ophelia said. “This has been something I’ve been punished over, by my grandfather, and I’ve simply learn to associate it with shame.”
“There is no shame with us. We understand.”
Impulsively, Ophelia hugged Gisele as she burst into quiet tears. Gisele laughed softly, hugging Ophelia until she could reclaim her composure. When she did, or was at least trying to, Athdara hugged her too, followed by Elisiana and Astria. As Gisele had said, they all had a past to a certain extent. No one was without some shame in their lives. Perhaps Ophelia’s had been a sin of some caliber, but no one was going to judge her for it. She’d been honest about it and that was all that mattered.
It was a moment of acceptance for the wives of Blackchurch.
Another lady of honor had come into their fold.
“Come, now,” Athdara said. “We must hurry. We told Creston an hour and it has been almost that already, so we must quickly finish everything.”
Astria and Elisiana broke for the door. “I am almost finished,” Astria said, bashing into Elisiana as they both tried to get through the door at the same time. “Lisi, move!”
They laughed all the way down the stairwell, followed by Gisele. “Athdara?” she said. “Do you want me to send a servant for a table for this chamber? It is big enough. It could use one.”
“Aye,” Athdara said. “And a trunk or a chest. See if there are any in the old barn.”
Gisele winked at Ophelia and fled, leaving the remaining two women to sort out the master chamber before Creston arrived.
“Linens,” Athdara suddenly said. “We need linens!”
With that, she rushed out. Ophelia watched her go, thinking of the women who had just left the chamber, women who had surprised her with their acceptance of something most noblewomen would not accept. She hadn’t expected that kindness, and it truly touched her.
Perhaps she had found a place where she would, indeed, belong.
The sprout of hope that had started when she married Creston began to grow. In this mysterious guild that men spoke of in hushed tones, it was possible that she would actually find a place where she belonged.
With renewed vigor, she went to hang up her clothing.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Creston was fairlydrunk.
