“I hope so,” I answer honestly. “We’re going to have to look into him and see if he’s affiliated with the group his brother belonged to, but this feels like a personal revenge thing. If the Jackals wanted revenge on me for Joss, they would’ve done it long ago. They didn’t give a shit then and I doubt they do now.”
“Good. Maybe things can finally get back to normal for us.”
Of course I want it to be over and for the people I care about to be out of danger, but normal for me was being alone most of the time. While I want her to get her normal back, the thought of mine isn’t that appealing anymore.
CHAPTER 22
LEE
Silver isasleep on the couch with her head in my lap when Justus and Landon return. We discuss things in hushed voices, making plans to check over the area tomorrow for blood or any other evidence that might’ve been left behind. Landon takes one look at the phone and says it’s beyond any kind of recovery which isn’t a surprise.
We hold off on the plan to visit Joshua Haney until we learn more about what Matthew Wynne has been up to. It may not be necessary if no one else is involved. Like it or not, I’m going to have to reach back out to Gerry Nolan and see if he knows if Matthew followed in his big brother’s footsteps. If he was involved with the Jackals or another trafficking group who might miss him, Gerry will know.
It’s after four in the morning when Landon heads back to the cabin and Justus goes to bed. I pick Silver up and carry her back to my bed.
She gives me a sleepy smile and lays her head on my chest. “Always carrying me around.” I wrap my arm around her, and run my hand up and down her back, listening to her steady breathing. Despite my roiling thoughts, sleep takes over quickly.
When I wake, the threads of a nightmare are slowly dissolving. I can’t remember much, just blood. A lot of blood. My bed is empty, but I can hear the murmur of Silver and Justus’s voices from the kitchen.
For a second, I just lie there, replaying the events of yesterday in my head. I’m worried about Silver, about how she’ll cope with a second near death experience. I’m afraid of how she might feel today about the fact that I killed someone last night. Sure, she knew it wasn’t the first time, and she didn’t hesitate to climb back into my arms. Still, knowing I’d killed before and seeing me bathed in the guy’s blood are two different things.
Before I leave my room, I send a text to Gerry Nolan saying that I need to talk to him.
Silver’s laughter rings out from the kitchen. Fucking Justus, always charming women. He hasn’t changed a bit. If I didn’t know how devoted he was to Sadie, I might be tempted to kick his ass.
Silver sits at the table with a plate of pancakes in front of her while Justus stands at the stove. “There’s sleeping beauty. I thought I was going to have to kiss you to wake you up,” he announces, holding up a spatula. “How many pancakes do you want?”
“Stop fantasizing about kissing me.”
“Fine, I’ll only imagine blowing you from now on.”
“Fuck off,” I snort.
Silver grins up at me. “Did you sleep good?”
“Like a rock.” I grab a fork and steal a bite of her pancakes, then turn to Justus. “Give me three. How’s your head?”
“I’ve never had any complaints, but I was just kidding about a blow job, dude.”
Silver’s laughter is so good to hear. We don’t talk about anything that happened as we eat breakfast. It’s amazing how normal things can feel not even twelve hours after chopping a man through the heart.
Gerry calls me after we finish eating and tells me he’ll get back to me once he checks his lists to see if Matthew’s name comes up anywhere. The temperature has dropped and it’s pouring ice cold rain outside as I leave Silver with Justus to finish cleaning up after last night.
The gravesite is a muddy patch of dark earth, but it isn’t the only bare spot. Even if someone was walking back here, it wouldn’t stand out. The place where he bled out is under about half an inch of water that’s flowing from the path back into the forest. I’m sure it’d glow if it was hit with a blacklight but there’s no visible signs of blood. I’ll check again when everything has dried out, but I think it’ll be fine. I sprayed off my ax last night, but I clean it more thoroughly and put it away before heading back inside.
Justus leaves to take Landon something to eat, and I’m glad to be alone with Silver. She can’t seem to settle on what she wants to do. I’ve watched her pick up her book multipletimes, scroll through her phone briefly, toss it aside, and search streaming services for something to watch, never choosing anything.
“Hey.” I catch her as she walks past me, wrapping my hands around her waist. “How are you doing?”
“I’m fine.”
“Silver.” I run my hand through her hair, looking into her eyes. “You could’ve died. For the second time in a matter of months. You don’t have to be fine.”
She nods, moving closer to hug me and lay her head on my shoulder. “It was terrifying in the moment, but it happened so fast. I’m not really dwelling on that right now.”
“You’re restless,” I reply rubbing her back.
“I am.” She pulls back to look at me. “It feels like I’m waiting for so much and I don’t know what to do with myself in the meantime. Waiting to get the insurance payment, waiting to hear from the realtor I called, waiting to see if that psycho was working alone and if this is really over. I’m going to go back to work tomorrow. Sitting around just makes it worse.”
