“You look wrecked,” Walker comments as he enters the gym, ready to start his own set.
“I’m fine.” I sip my water. “Here till three, then on call till midnight.”
“I’m off till morning.” Walker chuckles as he takes a seat on the rowing machine.
“The fuck are ya doing here then?”
“My house has two toddlers in it, so I wouldn’t get an ounce of sleep there. Easier to catch some z’s on the couch here.”
I nod, knowing he’s talking about his little nieces, and finish up to give him space. I’ve been at this workout for almosttwo hours already. Long, grueling workouts have been part of my day since my year in prison. Every morning and every night. The same routine mostly, and fuck have I needed them just to relieve the built-up tension in my blood. I’m wound up extra tight tonight because I know I’m gonna see Liv and I’mstillfucking craving her.
The way I’m shamelessly keeping tabs on her is almost out of control. I can’t even lie and say it’s to make sure she’s safe. It’s because Iwantto know what she’s doing, to see her. I know she’s going mostly between her shop, Nash and CeCe’s, Ginger’s, and Silver Pines because I happen to drive by all those places more than I should. But I won’t apologize to myself for checking in on her. Now that I’vehadher? The masochist in me just keeps watching.
Even if I know it can’t continue, which it can’t, Olivia should have the future she told me she’s dreamed about since she was nine. And I’m almost certain that the man she envisioned isn’t one with a dangerous, chaotic past. A man who might not even be capable of what she deserves. As if that truth needs to be driven home, I’ve got my uncle rearing his ugly head again for some godforsaken reason.
But even though I know all of that, Olivia’s eyes as I fucked deep into her needy cunt never leave me. The way she cried my name around her gag. The way shewantedher gag. I see those eyes everywhere, whether I’m awake or asleep.
She wanted all the dark things I imagined doing to her, and I didn’t expect that. Olivia might think she wants a steady suburban man, one who works a nine-to-five, has perfectly combed hair, and wears slacks and loafers. One who only fucks her on Saturday nights, holding back when he touches her, offering only half his attention. But I know what she really wants, what sheneeds,is a man who sees her every need before she even has it. One who appreciates the way she blushes when she trips over something, then cracks a joke about it. One who fists herhair with strong, steady hands while he kisses the fuck out of her. One who will offer her softness when she needs itandsome pain with her pleasure. The kind her eyes beg for even when her words don’t.
She needs a man likeme.And that’s the one thing I just can’t give her.
“I still fucking got it.” Haden leans forward in his chair and points at Nash with his beer.
“Sure do, Cowboy,” Cassie agrees, squeezing his thigh then kissing his neck.
“Hey, your mama is right here.” Glenda, Ivy and Cassie’s mom, turns her head to her daughter.
“Don’t pretend that you don’t do the same thing with Geoff,” Cassie scoffs, mentioning Glenda’s boyfriend.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
Glenda blushes as Cassie nudges her playfully. The relationship between them reminds me of the connection I had with my own mother. An odd pang of grief I haven’t felt in a long time hits my gut.
“I’m just sayin’, it’s been a while since you played football properly.” Nash grins before nodding toward me. “We’ll see if the boys want to get into it when they get here. I already told Asher.”
I’m just about to agree to a game when Ginger and Cole come through the sliding door onto the patio that runs the length of the back of the Ashby big house with Mabel; Ginger’s grandmother; and their dogs, Jake and Amy, in tow. Behind them is Walker and his younger brother Hunter Black.
“The great Hunter Black. Roper extraordinaire,” Dean pipes up. “You best be giving me your autograph before theday is over, son.”
Hunter salutes Dean. “You got it, sir.”
Walker’s younger brother is a sort of local celebrity, having just placed second on the southern tie-roping circuit. He’s a playboy to a fucking T and very much enjoys the fruits of his rodeo celebrity. But he’s a good guy and a hard worker in his craft. He still works with their older brother Beau on their family’s ranch when he’s needed. Hell, all the Black brothers end up back at that ranch even when they try to do something different. Their mother, Maeve, says that the land is in their souls.
“Football later!” Nash calls over to them now. “We’re gonna kick Haden’s ass.”
“Hell yeah, I’m in.” Hunter nods as he runs a hand over the scruff of his jaw.
One of the dogs, Amy, yanks on Cole and he almost drops the six-pack of beer he’s carrying.
“Son of a bit—”
“Burgers,” Ginger says over Cole’s cuss with a smile.
“It counts anyway,” Mabel says, not even stopping to look up. Cole digs into his pocket.
“Give it to Ginger, Dad. She’ll eTransfer everything to me at the end of the week.” Mabel grins.
“When didthatstart happening?” Cole asks Ginger, shaking his head and setting down his sixer as the dogs chase Mabel and the Ashby dog Harley into the yard.
