“I know everything, remember?” She winks. “Something told me to bake when I woke up this morning, and cookies might not solve all your problems, but they sure make them taste better.” She takes a seat beside CeCe and pops one into her mouth. “And FYI, in my experience, all it takes is one time, darlin’.”
“He looks like a dark sort of superhero half the time,” CeCe laughs, picking up a cookie. I follow suit because they look too good to pass up right now. I take a bite, and it soothes my tender stomach instantly. “Maybe he has super sperm.”
“We didn’t use a condom, I was on the shot …” I admit.
CeCe’s mouth falls open. “So this was definitely a hot andheavy moment …”
“I get it. Rookie mistake. But can we focus on the issue at hand?” I say as she straightens up and clears her throat.
“Yes, sorry. Kinda in shock here. When are you gonna tell him?”
“Half past never?” I retort. “I have no idea how he’s gonna react. And I need to have a plan. I need to tell him and see how involved he wants to be, if at all. I just don’t know when the right time is.”
“Nash said he’ll be here tomorrow,” CeCe offers.
My stomach drops at the idea of seeing him. “You can take as long as you need, but you have to ask yourself how long you think you can keep something like this to yourself, honey,” Jo notes, picking up another cookie. I smile at them both. I’m so damn grateful to have them in my life and so grateful my baby will grow up knowing such amazing women.
My baby… “Not long,” I mutter honestly. “But I need today at least.”
Jo reaches across the table and places her soft, comforting hand over mine. I love this woman like my own mother, and I know she has nothing but the best intentions for me at heart.
“Taking today to wrap your head around this is something youdeserve.Let’s have some snacks, maybe a movie marathon?”
“Sounds … perfect.” I breathe out. “Our babies are going to be only a few months apart!” CeCe squeals, her eyes full of excitement as she reaches over to squeeze my arm. “I’m so happy we’ll be going through this together.”
My heart sinks at her words. There’s such a stark difference between us. She has a committed husband, a ride-or-die through this.
I have a man I’m going to make this work with and co-parent with. The only way itwillwork, I realize, is if I let Mr. “I Don’t Believe in Love” off the hook completely. Tell him I’mnot in this equation.Iexpect nothing of him. Even if he wants to be involved with the baby, he doesn’t owemeanything. I would take the pressure right off and just let him get used to being a dad.
“One more piece of advice?” Jo’s calm, motherly voice cuts into my racing thoughts.
“Always.” I smile softly at her.
“You’re talking a lot about plans. You can plan all you want, but just remember, life doesn’t give a shit about those plans. In fact, the more you plan, the more the universe will throw you twists and turns.”
“I don’t do well with twists and turns,” I admit as CeCe starts to laugh.
Jo leans back, getting comfortable on the sofa. “Yeah, but sometimes those twists and turns bring you the greatest of gifts.”
A tear spills over my cheek. I’ve cried so much today already. But this time it hits harder because I know she’s right. This is a huge blessing, and though it may seem impossible, I already love this baby so much.
“No one plans their fate. But you can make the best of it and, trust me, sometimes people surprise you. You never know how he’ll feel,” Jo adds.
“He told me he never wants to settle down,” I tell them. “His exact words were ‘Romantic love just sets you up for grief one way or another.’”
“Okay, that is rather convincing,” CeCe gives, and I can’t help but laugh. This whole situation would be comical if it wasn’t my life. “But, for your information, Nash wasn’t up for that at first either. Sometimes, with the right person, it doesn’t feel like settling.”
“Look at you,” I tell her. “A mama already.”
She grins at me. “So are you.”
Nausea starts to creep up my throat again, but this time it’sfrom nerves. I can’t keep this to myself. I have to tell Asher tomorrow.
I groan. “What do I even say to him?”
CeCe and Jo look at each other then back to me. CeCe shrugs. “How about ‘Happy Fourth of July, Asher. You’re going to be a dad’?”
CHAPTER 18
