28
DIXON
LOS ANGELES…
Though my kneefelt like hell, I crossed the kitchen in three long strides. I was suddenly wide awake, the world crystal-clear around me. “What do you mean 'something's up'? What did Cat say exactly?”
My inner Alpha was stretching, making sure I knew that consuming, uncontrollable anger wasn’t gone, only slumbering. By the time I closed the distance to the island, Ryder stationed on the other side, a deep-chested growl vibrated my body. The last thing anyone needed was another episode of feral Dixon right now. I took a beat, holding up a hand to stop Ryder as he started to speak.
“Wait. Give me a second.” My words thrummed, heavy with the snarling scream that wanted to escape my mouth. I looked down at the tile, eyes tracing the grout lines. Planting my feet a foot a part, I tried to ground myself.The floor was solid. The world wasn’t tilting. Nothing terrible had happened yet. Live in the now. Don’t predict and panic.
Ryder handed me his phone. I punched my meaty finger against it, unlocking the screen. My eyes narrowed as I read the brief exchange. “Shit,” I muttered, hand gripping the phone tightening dangerously. I ran a hand through my already-chaotic hair before tossing Ryder’s phone on the island so I wouldn’t bust it.
“We don’t know anything for sure yet,” Ryder tried to console, though his voice betrayed his fears. I clocked the fact that he was soaked again. It wasn’t raining anymore. There were bags under his eyes. No sleep. The expensive visit from Beauty Mark Betas wasn’t going to mean jack shit if he looked like the walking dead by the time our Omega arrived.
“You think she’s trying to back out?” My stomach clenched at the thought, and Ryder’s quick answer was little comfort.
“I don't know. Could be anything. Paperwork issue. Transportation problems. Or...” He stopped speaking quickly.
“Or...” I repeated that word, letting it hang in the air, because I was also unwilling to finish the sentence. I looked across the kitchen, to the window over the sink. The sky outside was lightening, shifting from inky black to navy blue. Today was supposed to be our salvation. Only yesterday, we’d been dirt-deep under bushes trying to find our first taste of Tessa. Now some kind of vague bullshit might cut our hope off at the knees.
“Wouldn’t blame her for having second thoughts,” Ryder sounded defeated, deflated, lost. He grabbed the water bottle off the counter and drained it in one go. “But, fuck, if she remembers that night like I do how can she even debate backing out?”
“Think about that night, though,” I stood there, realization striking. Yeah, she might have had a mind-blowing kiss with Ryder, an undeniable soulmate connection, but if his story was accurate, Tessa had also gotten the worst news of her young life right after. “You said she left in a hurry, right? That things would be different if she’d stayed and met the rest of us?”
“Yeah, what does that—” He snapped his mouth shut, eyes widening. “You mean, what if that night isn’t a good memory. What we experienced doesn’t hold a damn candle to the fact she gotthatcall... the call that her entire fucking family died.”
I only nodded. There was no need to throw salt in his wound. Despite feeling more in control of myself than I had in over a year, I fisted my hands and slammed them down on the counter. My heart jumpedafterwards, because I’d held back enough that I didn’t snap the marble in two. That was a goddamn miracle.
“Dix, why would she agree to be matched with us in the first place? Why back out now, if that’s what’s happening?” He closed his eyes, fighting back whatever feeling was assaulting him now.
He needed to hear his words parroted back. It was also all I could offer.
“As you said, we don’t know anything for sure. All we can fucking do is take a deep breath, Ryder. We’ve been flying blind on this from the beginning. The Eros Institute always kept the details of their process guarded. You read the contract as well as I did. Our lawyers went over it line-by-line. No loopholes to force clarity. However, it is they find the Omegas, however they test them to make scent matches, it’s all strictly proprietary.” I tried to soothe, but every word felt like an empty pill capsule, no medicine inside. Just a hollow husk.
“We aren’t losing her,” Ryder said fiercely. I don’t think he’d heard a word I said. Ryder pressed his body across the island to grab his phone and began typing a message at lightning speed. He didn’t even bother standing back up. He just typed stretched across the marble. After a while, he set the cell down and spun it in my direction so I could read the updated convo.
Ryder: Whatever the issue is, solve it. Don’t lose the match.
Catalina: I’m coming down.
“Got to be bad news,” I breathed out. “If she’s coming to tell us in person this fucking early.” A stabbing pain hit my chest. Again. Again. Daggers hitting one after another. Bullseye on the target.Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.My instinct was to grieve before I even knew the ending of the story. I felt the monster rising. My Alpha, only recently brought to heel, was prepared to break its cage immediately, and with renewed ferocity.
“Don’t expect bad news. Cat’s coming to tell us she fixed the issue already.” Ryder forced the words. They were hollow. “It would be too damn cruel, Dix.”
It contradicted his earlier words.Fate isn't that kind. It’s too much of a coincidence that it could be her.Even with the photo and the scent proof, he was having a hard time believing Tessa was our Omega.
“Maybe,” I offered. It was all I could manage. I wasn’t good at fixing shit. I was brilliant at breaking. That was my role. I began walking out of the kitchen but stopped in my tracks when I heard a slam, then crunch, then Ryder cursing. When I looked back, I found him shaking his hand and wincing. “That’s my job, brother.” I couldn’t manage a smile. I knew how he was feeling. I don’t know what had clicked in me that I was suddenly able to swallow down the rage. Wasn’t going to take it for fucking granted though.
“How the fuck have you not had a million ER trips.” It wasn’t a question. Ryder was trying to fruitlessly set the cabinet back in place, as if he hadn’t busted one of the hinges.
I glanced down at my fucked-up knee.
“Sheer fucking stubbornness,” I admitted, knowing full well there were at least half a dozen times over the past year when I probably should have seen a doctor. “Not just that,” I added on after thinking, “Getting help after fucking things up for you guys felt selfish. I’d come back to reality after one of those bouts of ferality, and I was so goddamn ashamed. I still am, even though I know it wasn’t my fault. I know, rationally?—”
“Rational? You?” Ryder quipped, probably to stop me from spiraling. I frowned at him, and he shrugged. “It felt like a Tray moment.”
“Leave the comic relief to Tray,” I said grouchily, though I knew he needed boosting, not lambasting.
