But the truth was, it didn’t make him any more able to cope with the situation.
That was the saddest bit.
Feeling compassion, knowing something was wrong, didn’t fix things. It didn’t mean that everything could be put to rights as if it had never been wronged.
He was far too familiar with that truth.
But he had the horses now, and he would focus on them.
He got information about the special care and treatment they would need for a while as they continued to build up their strength, shook hands with the people from the rescue, and then he stood there, contemplating yet more evidence of his father’s general evil.
“You’re a good man,” Lydia said, patting his shoulder.
“I don’t know if that’s true. But I definitely feel that what happened to these creatures was unjust.”
Hank had perked up when the horses had arrived. Now he ran out into the field. The horses seemed to know him. Hank ran around them in circles, looking younger than he ever had in the time that Remy had had him.
“Look at that,” he said. “They’re friends.”
“I guess they were a soft place for each other. Even when the whole rest of life wasn’t soft.”
“I guess so.”
He cleared his throat. He wished . . . he wished for something. So fiercely, deep down, that he could barely breathe.
His whole life had changed in the past couple of weeks. Since Lydia had shown up with Hank. His house felt fuller. His life felt fuller.
He felt . . . he wanted to feel hopeful. But it was just so damned difficult.
“What are you thinking about?”
“That I can’t wait to go to bed tonight,” he said, looking at her, his chest expanding.
She blushed. Then stretched up on her toes and kissed him. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her back. “This has been good,” he said.
It had been. He had never really had a relationship with a woman like this before. Never gotten to where he knew so much about her. Both naked and clothed. Had never shared space like this.
“I love you,” she said, her eyes never leaving his.
He felt as if she had punched him in the gut. “What?”
“I love you, Remy. But I thought that was pretty obvious.”
“No, it . . . It’s not.”
How the hell would he know what love looked like? No woman had ever looked at him and said that. No one had ever . . . No.
“I’m sorry. I thought that I could keep my feelings to myself. I thought that . . . I thought that I could just let this go on as it was. I know that’s what you want. And actually . . . I don’t want you to say anything. I don’t want you to turn me away.”
He didn’t know what to say. Because of course he had been about to throw up all kinds of reasons why she couldn’t love him. Why they couldn’t be together. Of course he had been.
“I don’t want you to tell me that I don’t love you. Because I do. I have since long before you moved into my parents’ house.”
“You like a stray.”
“I do,” she said. “But I also know that just because a creature is a stray, it doesn’t make them any less valuable. If my having all this love to give to creatures who need it makes you believe my love for you is less real . . . I feel sorry for you. Because look at men like your father. Who take animals in and then treat them terribly. He was bad to people, he was bad to animals. Just because I like strays, that doesn’t make my love for you mean less.”
“Lydia . . .”
