“Neither of us is staying in town. And I’m not going to Boston.”
“I know.”
“You’ll only be sabotaging your other relationships in Vermont if you’re getting close to me like that. I’m still a pariah.”
“I know. We shouldn’t…” She shifted closer, and her voice dropped to a breath. “I just want you so much, Jade.”
“Oh, god.” I wasn’t any better, because I put a hand on her cheek, and she softened into it with a small, contented noise, batting her eyelashes. “Alyssa…”
“I can’t believe you want me too,” she said in a small laugh. “I’m literally so annoying.”
“I mean… we’ve established I’m a mean bitch.”
“Hey. We have established no such thing.”
“We’ve established it.”
“We havenot.” She sighed blissfully, shifting closer, close enough I could smell that perfume still lingering faintly on her, and I bit down on a quiet breath. “You’re the most caring and compassionate person I know… you’re just not superficial with it. Ask Cat. Ask Daniela.”
“Well… you’re not annoying, either. I swear everybody in this town wants to be around you, be your friend, talk to you, like the stars come out at night just for you. I’m not going to lie, I get so jealous and possessive that it’s not pretty.”
“Aw.” She laughed, caressing my cheek, and I felt the cool metal of her ring reminding me that it was real, that this wasAlyssa Taylor this close to me, touching me. “You should just kiss me and not worry about any of that, then…”
“You know we shouldn’t…” I trailed off, because I knew damn well I wasn’t holding back. I leaned in towards her, and she fluttered her eyes closed—it took some doing to get myself to close my eyes, too, because dammit if she wasn’t the most beautiful person I’d ever seen, and I wished I could have sat here justlookingat every part of her, but I shifted so our legs touched off the chairs between us, and I closed my eyes, and I leaned in, and I kissed her.
It had been the heat of the moment when I’d kissed her yesterday—hadn’t really been conscious of what I was doing, but this, now, I tasted her like she was the greatest thing I’d ever touched, soft and sweet and… spicy. And spicy.
I pushed away from her, wiping my lips as they tingled. “Alyssa—Christ, that’s spicy.”
“Spicy?” She fluttered her eyes open, laughing incredulously at me. “Is that the word we’re using about a kiss? Are you eighty years old?”
“No—literally, that’s—my lips are tingling.” I wiped them again, and it only did so much. “How hot is your soup that I can burn myself on yourlips?Are you not dying?”
“Oh.” She blinked fast, and she looked back at her soup, and she held up a spoonful for me. “It’s not that bad.”
I had no self-regard, because I tasted it. I felt like I got punched in the face, and I clasped my hand over my mouth, eyes watering. “Holy shit,” I managed with my mouth full.
“It’s literally not that bad,” she laughed. I didn’t even hear it—I choked and spat the soup into my bowl, coughing.
“How are youeatingthat?”
“It’s tasty!”
“I feel like I just ate a mouthful of glass.”
She laughed, eyes sparkling. “Okay, softie. Do you have ice cream?”
“Thank god, I do.” I stood up before I clocked what I was doing, and it was one blur of mouth pain later that I found myself sitting out on the back deck with a bowl of ice cream on the wooden porch swing between me and Alyssa, the valley spilling out below us quiet at night. The ice cream helped. Alyssa being the one feeding it to me also helped, a spoonful up to my lips as she gave me the most adoring look.
“There, there,” she said.
“I don’t know if the spice or the embarrassment hurts more,” I rasped, taking another mouthful of the ice cream. She laughed.
“Vermont isn’t the spice capital of the world, then, is it?”
“No. I guess not.” I sighed, handing the spoon back to her, and I leaned against the creaking wood of the swing back, looking up at the stars. “What are we doing right now?”
“I don’t know.” She kicked at the floor. “I mean… if I’m being honest… I’m not going to be able to behave myself around you if we don’t do something with this.”
