I frowned. “I didn’t say you weren’t.”
She sighed, and she turned around, opened a cabinet, and she took out a blowtorch, flicking it on. I took a step back involuntarily, like I was afraid she’d lost her temper and was going to set me on fire, but shockingly, she didn’t—she browned the cheese on top of the soup, set the blowtorch back, and she moved the peppers to a big tray before she said, “I’m not going to say you can’t be friends with Jade or with Cat. Just be careful with them. You’re a friend until you’re an enemy.”
“I trust them both,” I said. “Like I trust you and Linda both.”
She gave me an odd look, studying, eyes narrowed, before she settled into a tired smile. “There is something about you, Alyssa. You have flowers blooming in your heart. The goodness of a warm, sunny day. Just be careful nobody stamps it out of you. It would be a terrible thing to lose.”
Well, the closest I’d gotten was with Sawyer. And that flower garden was starting to bloom again. Spring was the right time for that, anyway.
The food was delicious, once we all gathered around the dining table and settled into easy, comfortable conversation, the topic of Jade and Cat far away from us now. I gushed over the soup and the peppers and the warm, fresh rye bread with compound butter, and the dry Riesling she paired it with. We settled into blueberry-infused crème brulées for dessert and little espresso shots that Charlie pulled from a machine fancy enough that even Linda was prohibited from touching it, and I was feeling incredibly spoiled by the time we finished.
They both gave me hugs at the door once the conversation had wound down and I’d finished metabolizing the wine, and Linda saw me off withI’ll text you about the openings,and Idrove back in exhausted satisfaction to where Daniela was still looking tired on her laptop in the kitchen, and she groaned when I came in, shutting the laptop.
“Christ, I didn’t even notice how long I’ve been here,” she said, pushing her computer aside. “How was it? How jealous should I be that I was too busy to go?”
“Oh, super jealous,” I said, dropping down into the seat across from her. “They said I was theirsample runbecause they’re still trying to figure out how to throw dinner parties, but I think they’ve got it down.”
“Brag some more, why don’t you,” she laughed. “Well, no biggie, I’m very competitive. I’ll just make you an even better dinner tomorrow.”
“Please, let me help even just a little. Charlie wouldn’t let me lift a finger to help, and I’m getting antsy.”
She grinned, and I recognized the look of… slightly giddy, slightly shy, at the same time. The same expression she’d always wear when she was talking about Candle Girl. “You already got Jade to come hang out with me, so you’ve done literally all I could ever ask for.”
“Oh, I, uh…” There it was again—that sinking sensation in my stomach. Why was I so immature about this? This wasn’t middle school. “I guess things have been going well for you two?”
“I mean, we haven’t gotten any time to hang out yet, but we’ve been texting up a storm and it honestly feels like nothing ever happened. I don’t know how you did it, but you’re my hero.”
I forced a smile. I was supposed to be happy for them. “Assuming it all goes well tomorrow, you should ask her out,” I said. “No unambiguity or whatever, just…this was nice, do you want to go on a date?”
“Okay, first of all, that’s lesbophobia, telling me to just ask a woman on a date instead of dancing around it for seventy years until we’re both dead. Secondly, you don’t think that’s too fast?I mean—” She gave me an exaggerated shrug. “We’ve only just started talking again. I don’t want to mess it up immediately.”
Well… if she did mess it up, it wouldn’t matter anyway, since Jade was on her way out of the place. Unless she got together with Daniela. Was I being unfair, trying to get Jade to stay with a relationship? I just told myself I was going to make sure shedidfeel welcome in town again, and then the rest was up to her. But I couldn’t tell Daniela any of that, not since I’d promised Jade I would keep it a secret. “Jade’s an adult,” I said. “She can handle you have feelings without making it weird if it’s not reciprocated. But… I feel like it is.”
She hung her head. “What am I even supposed to say? I’m not used to just telling a girl I like her and want to go on a date.”
“It doesn’t have to be a big deal. You can pitch it as a low-stakes thing to test it out and see how it feels. But… you can still make it romantic,” I said, and it felt like pulling teeth when I said, “Where was the place you almost kissed?”
She hunched her shoulders, picking at something on the edge of the table. “It was this one spot in the park, close to the building for the old mill. It’s a little peak with some really good night sky views. We were stargazing.”
That was so romantic. I loved cute, romantic things. Why did this one make me want to shrivel up into a ball and disappear? “Ask her to go stargazing again,” I said. “That’d be cute and romantic. And if she also thought it was an almost-kiss, then she’ll know exactly what you’re thinking.”
She lit up. “Yeah? You think so?”
“She’d love it.” I smiled broadly. “You can bring a nice meal you’ve cooked and that candle she got you, and you can have a romantic firelight dinner under the stars.”
“You’re good at this,” she laughed. “Who areyoulooking at around here, anyway? I bet you could score someone no problem.”
“Oh, uh…” I blanked.
“Still thinking of Abby’s offer?”
“No—I mean, she’s lovely, but—” I was blushing furiously. I didn’t know why. I also didn’t know how to turn it off. “I just don’t think I’m looking to date someone right after Sawyer.”
“Yeah, that makes sense,” she said. “Well, clearly you’re getting your romance in vicariously, and I love that for you. And for me!” She stretched her arms out in front of her. “See, now you’ve helped me doubly. So you don’t need to do anything for the party tomorrow.”
“Ugh—no fair!” I laughed, crossing my arms. “Please. I want to feel like I’m contributing to the party too.”
“You already—”
