“The celvusa really saved you?”
Brela nodded. “I don’t even know how the hells I called it, or how it didn’t shred me either, but the magic I used? Farr, I’d never touched that kind of magic before. I only just learned the movements from the book Serill gave me.”
Farrah squeezed her hand. Brela had already shared what the beast had shown her when she was stuck in the illusion, and that Oni had been no help for explaining what it had said.
Farrah knew promising they’d find answers was useless so she didn’t reply. She didn’t really knowwhatto say.
Brela reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind Farrah’s ear. “Hey, I’m really proud of you. I mean, part of me would have preferred you and Elias were safe in Averlyn, but… having you both with me helps. It will make tomorrow not hurt as much.”
“Do they know?” she asked, looking back to where Cason and Serill sat.
“They have a map, they know where we’re going.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
Brela pinched her lips together. “No, they don’t.” She swallowed. “If this is what Calcheth has become, there’s no point in telling them.”
“Bre—“
Elias’s laughter cut her off as the women darted looks over their shoulders. Cason’s cheeks were flushed and Serill looked like he was putting an extremely difficult puzzle together.
“Oh, gods. We may need to rescue Cason. I think Elias is about to tell them about the three of us sleeping together for the first time,” Brela chuckled. “I don’t know if my dragon is ready for that, and we’ve already corrupted Serill enough.”
Farrah blinked at Brela.
“What?” Brela asked.
“You just called himyourdragon.”
“I’ve done it before.”
“Yes, but only when you’re using him.”
Brela raised a brow. “And I’m still using him?”
“No, I think that ship has sailed, which means you’re working on a scheme. I’ve seen what you’ve been drawing in your notebook. Trying to change him is like asking the vaarasuxa not to eat meat. Never going to happen.” Brela’s pale eyes narrowed, but Farrah ignored the glare. “Youkissedhim, Brela. Not just the frenzied ‘how quick can we strip’ kissing, but one that meant more. To both of you.”
She clenched her jaw. “I regret telling you that.”
“No, you don’t,” Farrah replied with a pointed look.
To her surprise, Brela’s glare broke and she pressed her forehead into Farrah’s shoulder. “Gods, I hate myself. I hate feelings. Take them away, please.” She huffed. “I don’t know why I can’t control myself around him. That tug Oni mentioned? It’sunbearablystrong, but it also feels… I don’t know. ‘Right’ isn’t the word, but neither is ‘familiar’.”
“Power drawn to power?” Farrah asked as Brela lifted her head.
“Then shouldn’t our powers be repelling?” Brela grumbled. “Sorry. More questions that can never be answered.”
Farrah let out a sigh, sliding her fingers through Brela’s. “I can’t believe we’re even having this conversation.”
Brela hummed her agreement before changing the subject. “Do you want to talk about why you walked out here? If you’d prefer Moonheart’s company, that’s fine, too, but I’m happy to listen.”
“I could talk.”
The horse nudged her, and Farrah took it as a good sign. So she spoke, Brela adding comments when Farrah needed it most. She repeated the story of their first meeting, what Brela had done to help her, and how she’d felt the next morning to wake up and see Brela had sat guarding her all night.
Maybe what helped the most was that Brela knew what it was like, had experienced her own, similar hurts and could just listen. Brela helped her understand that two strong women didn’t have to always have their shit together, and that it wasn’t a weakness to have those scars or feel lost.
Brela reminded Farrah that she wasn’t tainted or broken or helpless. That she’d learned to fight, to protect, and to love again, and that even if it was a challenge to remember it every day, she was worthy of that love.
