She tried to take control of her breathing, to calm herself so she could keep pretending. But in that quiet moment, panic seized her harder. Iryana couldn’t hear anything beyond her own breathing and the quiet movements of her team. Where were the night critters that roamed the city? Surely there should be some noise.
She froze, ears straining. Were there dakii in the city?
A creaking sound a short way off had every hair on her arms standing, a shiver running over her body.
“What was that?” she asked, voice hushed.
No one answered for a bloated moment until Pepha said, “Vabihn probably stepped on a loose board.”
Probably?
Gods, she couldn’t breathe. Her head was light, her whole body prickling, and she could barely keep herself standing. It felt like the world was spinning, like she was about to fall off the edge of a cliff, a gust of wind blowing the hairs that had escaped her braid against her neck.
It felt like she was being watched, hunted.
She wanted to see, to confirm for herself. Her breathing was so fast, so loud, that it wouldn’t be hard for a dakya to hear them.
“Are you sure?” Her voice cracked.
“Yep,” Shahn sighed.
“It’s fine. And there’s been no signal from the guards on the wall that they’ve seen anything,” Vaneshta added.
Her teeth grated. Why would they care? They could jump into action quickly, arm themselves with a moment’s notice. She was the defenseless one.
Iryana took another steadying breath, but it didn’t stop the spinning.
“It’s fine, Iryana. Focus.” Vaneshta’s voice was edged in frustration.
They weren’t used to being alone with the dakii, with having to pay attention to every sense, every movement. They were used to having a team around them.
They might not sense the dakii before it was too late for her.
And that broke her resolve.
“No!” Vaneshta cried as Iryana reached up and ripped the blindfold off in one sharp motion.
Iryana’s chest heaved, vision still spinning. She was standing on the edge of a curb, only a foot above the ground. Her eyes darted to the shadows, to the empty alley behind them, to the forest she could see glimpses of down the road.
Nothing.
“Iryana—”
“No,” she snapped, gasping. “You don’tknow. You could be wrong, and I’d be the one with my throat ripped out.”
They were silent, but there was a mix of pity, confusion, and discomfort on their faces. She couldn’t stand it.
Iryana started walking back toward the fort, blindfold slipping out of her fingers and onto the road.
She couldn’t do it.
After a block, Vaneshta caught up to her.
“We can try it again. Or something else. A different exercise.”
Iryana just shook her head. She was going to pass out. Every inch of her skin crawled.
“I just need to know you aren’t going to put the team at risk. That when it matters, we can count on you.”
