We turned to watching the game, which we muted so we could listen to the radio play-by-play with the old announcers, Herb and Buzz. They seemed to love Ronan and I loved them for it. He got in a lot, even more than the guy who was the starter. It was easy to tell that, since I tracked his minutes on the stopwatch on my phone.
It was a great game, very exciting, which meant that we felt exhausted at the end, as if we had been out there playing ourselves. We rested afterwards and listened to Herb and Buzz interview some of the players, but unfortunately not Ronan. Then we replayed it and skipped through to the important parts (when the defense was on the field) and Ed pointed out more of the finer points of the action, which was great. I took notes on my phone and asked a lot of questions until finally he mentioned that he’d better get going.
“See you tomorrow for dinner,” I reminded him as he said goodbye. Then I had to respond to Kiya about meeting for drinks next week, to Taylor about planning a baby shower, and also to Victoria. She had asked me to call when the game was over and I finally did, and her news was big.
“We kind of worked things out,” she said. “Me and Beau. We’re going to talk again and I think we’re going to be able to co-parent.”
“Did what happened today with the Woodsmen meeting change your mind about him?”
“It was good to hear that he was taking work more seriously,” she agreed.
I winced, but she couldn’t see that. I hoped he would be more serious in the future.
“Other things were more important,” she continued. “He also showed me pictures of his apartment and he set up a whole baby area, with a crib and a changing table. He’s concerned that the wall color might not be right but I don’t care about that. Andhe’s signing his divorce papers next week and that will be settled and done. I don’t know if he and I will get together as a couple, but this is good. It’s a relief.”
It was very good. She had to hang up because she said that growing a baby made you tired, and nine o’clock was as late as she was going these days. I texted with Ronan, up until he got on the plane to come back. Then I settled in to watch the game for a third time but I woke up to his voice telling me that he was home and to his arms cradling me.
“I’m awake,” I said. “I was waiting for you.” I blinked a lot and saw him smiling in the blue light of the TV.
“I like coming back and seeing your toy car in the driveway, and I like finding you asleep here. Which you were,” he said. “Move over.”
It was a big couch but there wasn’t room for two of us side by side, so I ended up mostly on top of him. “Is your back ok?” I asked. I had seen him moving a little stiffly after the third quarter, but he had told me that he was fine when I’d texted him after the game.
“I feel great.” He shifted me slightly and sighed with what sounded like contentment. “I was thinking about you a lot.”
“Yes?What, exactly?”
“Exactly this,” he answered. “Us being together, me holding you. Eating breakfast tomorrow, working on your suspension, having fun. I just like being around you. You’re my best friend.”
“You’re mine,” I answered.
“Also, uh…” He hesitated and then cleared his throat. “There’s more, too. While I was gone, I was working out how to tell you. I’ve been stewing about it since we had that argument when I invited you to move in with me.”
“I wanted to, but I said no because I got worried about us,” I quickly explained. “I got worried that somehow, we would mess up what we had. I thought that I would mess it up by being a bi—by being myself, and you wouldn’t like me.”
“I definitely like you. The thing that I realized was that it’s more, because I also love you,” Ronan told me. “I love you.”
“As a friend?”
“As everything,” he said. “Every part of love, with every part of me.”
“Oh.” I picked up my head so that I could see him. “I love you, too.” I loved him so much that it didn’t seem possible that I’d been existing before, worrying about pillows and being alone. How had I been going along for all that time, without this? Without him?
“I’m glad I climbed up on that table with you. I’m indebted for life to those rats,” he said, and then he kissed me. The couch was comfortable but it did restrict our movement, especially as he tried to pull off my Wilder jersey.
“Here we go,” he said, and sat up with me semi-attached to him. I was still holding on so that I could kiss his neck and as he stood and carried me up to his bedroom—I had never noticed that the staircase was so narrow, but I didn’t mind bumping my knees when he was massaging my butt. He sat down and then leanedback against the pillows on his bed, which were just as attractive as the ones on his couch.
Ronan was much more attractive than the pillows, though. He had managed to yank off his T-shirt downstairs so a lot of him was visible, from the dusting of dark hair over his pecs to the lines that divided the squares of his abs. Now he finished removing my jersey, and the shirt I’d worn under that, and the tank I had under that, too. “Thank you,” he said. “I know you put on all these clothes so you wouldn’t have to turn up the heat—Cate!” I had yanked down his pants. “There’s a zipper—ok, let me—Cate—”
His words ended in a groan because, while I hadn’t gotten his pants all the way down, I had moved them to about his knees and then tugged on his boxer briefs. In doing so, I’d managed to brush against some sensitive areas but he hadn’t made a noise of pain. It had sounded like pleasure and his hips had risen as if he was chasing my touch.
I was happy to provide it. “Tell me if I’m doing this wrong,” I said as I stroked him. I was enthusiastic but I didn’t have a ton of penis practice. “Just gently like this? Or do you want me to take off your underwear, first?” I went again to the elastic waist and started to pull.
“Let’s equalize our nudity,” he said, breathing hard. He reached up and slid my bra straps off my shoulders. “This is pretty. I like the lace and it’s nice to think that you’re wearing this underneath all those layers.”
I had bought it while shopping with Taylor. “In case anyone might see more of you…” she’d hinted and had held it up. It was a good pick.
But when he started to unclasp it, I crossed my arms in front of my chest.
