And this time it wasn’t questioning, like the first time – nor desperate, like it had been at the apothecary. This time it was soft, and slow, and achingly sweet – and she wanted to imprint it upon her memory forever, save it in a room of its own – one filled with golden lamplight, and the warmth of his mouth against hers as he breathed: ‘Ava—’
His fingertips traced a line down her cheek, before coming to rest in the dip between her collarbones, the place where her pulse thrummed in time with his, and she felt the thread between them grow taut. The same thread that had ached when they’d been apart and now – now that he was close enough that she could feel his breath upon her cheek, could smell the cold wind upon his collar – sent a shivering warmth into her stomach.
And then he pulled back, pressing his forehead to hers, his eyes squeezed shut.
‘I don’t suppose we could stay here forever?’
Ava smiled – for she didn’t want this cocoon of happiness to crack either. ‘My family will be out there,’ she said softly. ‘Waiting for me.’
‘I suppose you’re right,’ said Damien. ‘But perhaps they can wait justone more minute.’
And he smiled as his arms curled ever tighter around her waist, and he kissed her again.
Chapter Sixty-Nine
Her father was waiting for her in the auditorium, alongside Oliver, Jem, Mr Jane and Mrs Moss – who was holding the most enormous bouquet of flowers Ava had ever seen.
‘You werewonderful, darling!’ Mrs Moss said, handing Ava the flowers at the very same moment that she pulled her in for a hug, crushing some of the rose petals between them. ‘Just wonderful. And you, Arthur—’
Mrs Moss turned to Ava’s father, wiping at her cheeks. Given how red her nose was, clearly Mrs Moss had been crying already this evening, and now another tear slipped down her cheeks. ‘We at the Widows’ and Widowers’ Club are so proud of you. Goodness,Iam so proud of you. Did you know he was going to do that?’
‘No,’ Ava said.
‘I might’ve had an inkling,’ said Oliver, meeting his sister’s eye cautiously, and giving her a tentative smile. ‘He mentioned something on the walk over.’
‘In fact, Oliver talked him into it,’ said Jem.
She looked at Oliver, and Oliver looked at her, and when he smiled at her she saw there was peace there, now, where before there’d only been guilt.
‘You were really very good,’ said her father, his gaze flicking up to hers. ‘Better than I’d expected.’
‘What Pa means to say is that he’s sorry,’ said Oliver, giving his sister a look. ‘For not coming to support you sooner.’
‘She would have loved to have seen you up there,’ her father said, reaching to place a hand upon Ava’s shoulder. ‘Really.’
‘And the audience seemed to love it,’ said Jem. ‘They loved you, Ava. Did youhearthat applause?’
‘It was deafening,’ agreed Mr Jane.
Ava felt something warm bloom in her chest as she looked at each of them in turn. And then her eyes met Damien’s.
‘Tonight was my last night, actually,’ said Ava, adjusting the flowers just slightly, the brown paper crackling. ‘I’ve told Miss Lillian already, but I’m taking a break from the theatre after this.’
‘Taking a break?’ Mrs Moss blinked at her as though she’d suggested everyone should set their hats afire. ‘But Ava, you’re so good at it!’
‘I know,’ Ava said, giving her a small smile. ‘But I think I was doing it for the wrong reasons. I think what I want to do, what I’dliketo do, is … help people.’ She looked at Damien, and he at her. ‘And I don’t believe I need a stage for that. I don’t need an audience to tell me if I’m good enough.’ She swallowed the lump that’d been forming in her throat. Oliver looked up at her then, his blue eyes sad, and she held his gaze as she continued.
‘Because what I’ve realized – what I’ve come to realize – is that we’re all enough. Exactly how we are. It’s only other people that convince us that we’re not. Other voices, in our heads. And frankly … they’re wrong.’
‘Well said,’ agreed Mrs Moss, reaching beneath the brim of her hat to surreptitiously wipe away a tear. ‘Very well said, Ava.’
Her smile widened a little then, though the faces before her were beginning to blur, and she reached for her brother’s hand. And her eyes said:I mean it, Oliver.
He looked up at her, his mouth tweaking at the corner.I know you do.
‘Anyone fancy a cup of tea?’ Mr Jane asked. ‘I know just the place.’
And he looked at Damien, and gave him a wink.
