“Josie!”
Josie lifted her gaze and spotted Aunt Polly holding Nathan in the wagon, while the other children rode in the back. Overwhelmed by longing, after a week and a half apart, she rushed towards them without a second thought. Aunt Polly halted the wagon, and Ivy—cradling Gideon—and Lillian climbed down. Josie knelt to their level, enveloping them in a warm embrace. The short separation felt like an eternity. She kissed the tops of their heads, wishing she could hold them forever.
“I missed y’all so much.”
“Please don’t send us away ever again,” Lillian begged.
Josie ran her fingers along the brim of Lillian’s snow cap. “I agree. I never want to be separated from the four of you another minute.” Josie pinched Gideon’s cheeks. “You’ve grown too much, little man.”
Gideon giggled and squirmed in Ivy’s arms. Josie hastily stood to see Nathan. She felt as if part of her soul had escaped her body, being separated from her flesh and blood. Aunt Polly laid him gently in Josie’s arms. His blue eyes had a hint of brown.Josie’s heart skipped a beat.Brown eyes.He was going to have brown eyes just like her. She drew him close against her chest, determined never to let him go again.
“I missed you, sweet boy.” Josie looked up at Aunt Polly, who was bundled in her buffalo-hide. “Was he all right? Did he cause any problems for Rose and the reverend?”
Aunt Polly smiled and touched the top of Nathan’s bundled head. “Not at all. He was so precious, and Rose hated to give him back. Andy and Paul enjoyed playing with him. They’re already asking for a baby brother.”
“Maybe you can make Rose a magic potion,” Josie teased, bouncing her son up and down.
Aunt Polly chuckled, her hands resting on her hips. “I’ll start today. The valley should be overrun with young’uns.”
“Where’s Pa and Jonas?” Lillian asked, tugging at Josie’s wool skirt.
“Jonas is in his bed, and your pa is resting.”
“Can we see them?” Ivy asked, struggling to keep her squirming brother from tugging at her hair.
“If you’re quiet. They need time to recover, so don’t tire them out.”
Ivy put Gideon down, and he chased after them inside, his chubby legs hardly able to work in the snow. It made Josie’s heart ache to see Gideon walking. She missed the day she’d carried him in her arms and cuddled him. It didn’t matter if she was pregnant with Nathan or not—he was her first baby.
“We have five deaths so far—some settlers homesteading east of the Kents,” Aunt Polly said as they slogged their way to the cabin door.
Josie’s lips pressed to a solemn frown. “I know how it feels to lose family to an unexpected illness. When the fever started, I almost lost my mind with worry. Nearly losing Travis—” Josie paused. She wanted to say more—so much that she thoughtshe’d burst. But she needed to keep those thoughts buried, just like her dark secret she tried to forget. “I-I was so frightened, Aunt Polly. I thought I was going to lose him days ago. I couldn’t bear that.”
“And does Travis know about this? Have you told him how you feel?”
Josie’s breathing grew shallow as she held Nathan tighter, willing every ounce of her strength not to spill too much, but she loved Aunt Polly so dearly. The woman was the only person who knew a small piece of what Josie hid from the town. Josie closed her eyes, remembering the painful scene during Travis’s delirium.
“I’d look like a fool and ruin everything. While he was sick, he was delirious for two days. He . . . kept calling out Sophie’s name, and I know he’d never love me when she is still in his heart. It’s ten years of marriage that can never be replaced.” Josie sighed and looked at her feet. “I’ll forever be his mail-order bride.”
Aunt Polly placed her hand on Josie’s shoulder. “I would say sit down because we need to talk this out slowly, but out here, there’s snow past our ankles and inside is full of chaos. Sophie and Travis had been in love for over ten years. From being a widow myself, I can see how hard it is for him to love again, but you must be patient. He respects you, and I know in my heart, he will grow to love you because he would be crazy not to.”
Josie cradled Nathan’s face close to her chest, keeping him warm for a few extra moments. “All I know about marriage is pain and abuse. This marriage . . . It’s different, and I want it to work. Travis is a good man, and him being a father to my son should be enough, but the feelings I have are complicated. I don’t know how to control them. I’ve never—I’ve never loved anyone like this.”
Aunt Polly smiled. “Love is a beautiful thing, isn’t it?”
“It is.”
“You and Travis will be in my prayers.”
“Thank you, Aunt Polly.”
Josie and Aunt Polly entered the warm cabin as little Jonas and the other children’s laughter echoed from the next room. It was the kind of joy Jonas had desperately needed over the past week. Travis still rested in Josie’s bedroom, and she couldn’t resist wondering what he might be dreaming about. But that thought faded; it no longer mattered.
She had to trust that their marriage was in God’s hands and that whatever happened was meant to be.
As the sun set and darkness settled into the cabin, Josie gently tucked the children into bed. For the first time, Gideon nestled beside his brother instead of sleeping in a crib, their small bodies close together under the warm blankets. Josie closed the bedroom door and went to check on Travis. He’d slept all afternoon and evening, so the children were unable to see him. Surviving the deadly disease was a miracle, and while his recovery would take longer, Josie had faith Travis would heal completely.
He was a tough man, eager to work again once his fever broke. Knowing Travis’s stubbornness and need to provide, Josie knew in her heart it would be hard to keep him in bed. He would tend to the livestock then return to the mercantile for extra work. Josie had a feeling there would be more jobs to fill after the tragedies.
