Tom wiped his eyes. “I don’t want to marry you, Sasha. I really don’t. You know something? You’re only ever nice to me when you want something. That’s how you’ve always been, and I’m just seeing it now. I guess before all this, I was willing to...not overlook it, that’s not right, but, I guess, beblindto it. But now that I know, to be completely honest, I’d rather be lonely than with you.”
Sasha’s painted mouth dropped open as she gaped at him.
“I’m sorry we got to this point,” Tom added, and the laughter and smiles disappeared. “I’m sorry I let us get this far. If it means anything to you, I’m sorry I used you. Because I did use you, Sasha. You’re right, I don’t like being alone. That fish in the pond, the one you wanted to catch? I think it wanted to be caught, and it didn’t matter who held the rod.”
“Tom,” Sasha spluttered.
“I don’t want to marry you, Sasha,” Tom said again, for the final time.
“But . . . but . . . but Ari doesn’t want you—”
“I told you, this isn’t about Ari. Not really. This is about me now. And it’s about you too, in a way. I don’t want you to be unhappy, Sasha. I really don’t. Life’s too short to be unhappy. And you’d have been unhappy with me, eventually.”
Something in Tom’s chest loosened, and he took a deep breath. His lungs felt cleaner, less tight, and he smiled up at Sasha. It was a bittersweet smile, one he hoped she understood.
“Thank you,” he said honestly. “Thank you for getting me through the last few years. Thank you for being with me.”
For a moment, Sasha stared at him. Her mouth still hung open, and her beautiful face was set into a porcelain mask of shock.
“Sasha?” Tom asked in concern.
At his words, she snapped back into action. “Thank you for being with me?Thank you? You are fucking kidding me, right? Years of you moping around and all I get is a fucking thank you?”
“That’s all I have to offer right now.”
“Well, you can keep it,” Sasha snapped. “Fuck you, Tom. Fuck you.”
And with that, she stalked out of their room, slamming the door behind her.
* * *
Ari was sitting in the garden with Reine, shivering in her coat while the little girl played. She felt cold and tired, weary right down to her bones. She wrapped her arms around her legs, burrowing closer into herself. Reine had a little collection of dolls out, ones Marnie had pressed into her hands earlier.
“They were mine, once upon a time,” Marnie had said. “It would be so lovely if Reine could take them. It would make me very happy.”
Ari hadn’t had the heart to refuse Marnie. The older woman was trying hard, Ari reflected. She was treading carefully, clearly desperate to be in Reine’s life while giving Ari the space she thought she needed.
Ari rested her head across her folded knees, watching Reine move the dolls around the garden, talking to them, or making them talk to one another. She was still her usual vibrantly intelligent self, and Ari felt a flicker of relief. Despite the upheaval of this weekend, Reine was okay — happier, even, for the time she’d been spending with the man she now knew to be her father.
Ari blinked. She couldn’t help but wonder what was happening with Tom and Sasha. Couldn’t help but wonder what they were doing, saying or thinking. After Sasha had come upon them earlier, Tom had whisked her away into the house, leaving Ari and Reine with apologies and a promise to find them later.
Ari didn’t know what to think or how to feel. This afternoon, Tom had tried so hard with them both. He’d really made an effort where Reine was concerned, and Ari couldn’t help the flush of pleasure that had rushed through her when she’d seen her child playing with her father. It was something she’d longworried she would never see, something she’d hoped against hope Reine would experience. Reine had Sebastian and Luis, it was true, but seeing her with Tom had been a long-held and deeply cherished dream for Ari.
The sound of a car pulling into the gravel driveway made Ari look up, and she peered across the grass, watching as a man stepped out of a beaten-up old Sedan. He stretched, looking up at the house, before turning back to the car and pulling out a case — just as beaten up and old as his car — from the back seat.
Another visitor?Ari thought.How many more people does this house need right now?She went to call out to Reine, always wary of her child when a stranger was present, when the man suddenly seemed to clock her, peering at her curiously.
“Hello,” she called out, raising a hand. “Are you looking for Marnie? Or Tom? I think they’re all inside.”
The man peered at her more closely, then put his case down and walked in her direction.
Bollocks,thought Ari. She wasn’t really in the mood for a conversation with anyone. Not when her mind was still thinking about what was happening between Tom and Sasha.
“I know you,” the man said, nodding as he walked closer. “You’re just some woman.”
Ari blinked twice. “Um . . .”
“Forgive me, that was abrupt. I mean, I’ve heard about you,” the man corrected himself. “I spoke with Tom about you, years ago. You were just some woman then, although clearly not, since he was mad about you. And obviously Mom spoke with me about all this.”
