“What about Graham?” Dad asks. There’s a placating tone to his voice. I know he’s doing it to try and appease me, but I know Mom. Mom won’t hear it.
“Graham? The same guy who hasn’t been to see Noah in the hospital once? That Graham?” Okay, maybe Mom is more annoyed for reasons other than I thought. “Forget that, but he has games to play. What if he’s away and Noah has an episode?”
“An episode?” I ask.
“Any sudden headaches, and we’d want to know immediately,” the doctor tells us.
“Are we able to take him home with us?” Mom asks. “To Denver, I mean. We’d be able to have him with us to keep a better eye on him.”
“He would be cleared to fly, so I don’t see why you couldn’t do that.”
“That settles that.” Mom sticks her hand out to shake the doctor’s hand. “Thank you for everything you’ve done to help take care of Noah. I’ll never forget it.”
“We want to see our star player back on the ice next season. The nurse will be in shortly for discharge. I hope I don’t see you again.”
“Thanks, Doc. I can say the same to you.”
After he leaves, I breathe a sigh of relief. Even though I won’t be rejoining the team, at least I won’t have to be staring at a hospital ceiling for the next however many days.
“Are we able to stop by my place before we head home?” I ask as soon as they’re gone.
Dad nods. “We have plenty of time. The team owner said we can use their plane to get home, so I don’t think they’d mind if we have a stowaway.”
I laugh, and for the first time, it doesn’t hurt. Maybe there is an end in sight to this whole ordeal. Even if my body is startingto heal, the process of my heart healing might not happen immediately.
Because I still haven’t talked to Graham. And if I leave for Denver tonight, I don’t know when I’ll see him next.
I don’t want to run out of town without having the chance to talk to him. What I’ll say to him? I guess we’ll cross that bridge when we get there.
The drivefrom the hospital to home seems never-ending. With each passing minute, the nerves in my stomach threaten to overwhelm me.
Given that it’s a Wednesday with an away game tomorrow, practice should be getting out soon. Unless Coach dismissed everyone early.
I really don’t fucking know.
The panic at seeing Graham is starting to settle in now. I’ve never had to deal with this before. The guy in Denver? It fizzled out on its own. No big dramatic breakup.
Maybe if there had been feelings involved, it might have been more difficult. It was just fun. Easy.
With Graham? It’s a lot harder. Because feelings are definitely involved.
I follow my parents up from the garage, and with each passing floor, I wish I could have just waited in the car.
Like a coward.
When Dad unlocks the door, the apartment is empty. Blissfully so.
“Take a few minutes. We’ll start packing,” Dad tells me.
“Okay.”
Walking in here now feels so different from that day all the months ago when I moved in here. Back then, it was more apprehension because I had no idea if Graham and I would get along well enough to make it work.
And now here we are.
The two of us in a weird limbo because I fell for him when I told myself I shouldn’t. Because Graham was only just starting to figure out this side to him. A side that I’ve known about myself for as long as I’ve been alive.
Sitting down on the couch, the memories, while once happy, seem painful. Because I know what I have to do.
