Chapter 37 – Xavier
One Week Later
I stared out the window, not appreciating the passing scenery that made up Jersey’s beautiful landscapes. One week away had done nothing to ease my erratic mind. The source of my chaos, a beautiful woman who’d captured my eyes with her broken soul, stole my heart with her laughter and then I went and fucked it up with my inability to control my need.
Leaning down, I touch my lips to hers, slipping my tongue into her open mouth. God, she tastes so sweetly delicious, I take a moment to savor her innocence. She flicks her tongue against mine with a soft moan, demanding more. I guide our lips in a slow dance—I lead, and she follows. Her reaction is carefree, desperate, her tongue gripping mine as though she lacks rhythm, yet so goddamn enchanting, I want more.
What began as a lesson in kissing should’ve stayed there, I allowed it to go further, and now I was afraid of the consequences. Mikaela was a beautiful bird whose wings had been clipped. Instead of teaching her to fly again, I was exerting the same perverse acts as her captor.
And why I had to get out of there—to find my soul the devil was threatening to usurp. Yet a week away did nothing to soothe the ache a simple kiss provoked. Hopefully, my time away had also given Mikaela a reprieve to rethink her need to please me. Perhaps her interest in Rhett had piqued, or she’d developed an affinity for something else.
I was wrong on all accounts.
“You’re home.”
I heard the breathless excitement in her voice before I turned away from the door to find Mikaela at my rear—her hands behind her back, her bottom lip between her teeth, her expression expectant. Since she’d been here, she’d gone from skin and bones to flushed hues of pink and sparkling eyes. Her hair had taken shape and fell in thick, glossy curls around her waist. Smiling, I remembered that day I brought home a hairstylist. Mikaela had looked at the woman with such hate, it was no wonder she still smiled when she left.
Now, in a simple white summer dress that fell to her ankles adorned in sandals the same color, Mikaela reminded me of a single lily, leaning into the sun to catch its warm rays. Although still shy, her confidence had blossomed. Regardless, I had yet to see her cry—an emotion she guarded with skill despite being broken. I’d been the cause of her first smile, followed by her laughter. When it finally arrived, it was a beautiful phenomenon, so the anticipation of her tears left me curious, wondering when and how she was likely to respond. What would bring it out?
Despite the reason behind my leaving and unlike the hatred I’d poured over myself for taking advantage of her, she didn’t appear apprehensive. It was like that night hadn’t happened. I waited for something to give, for her to lash out and demand why I left her, she didn’t. If I understood her expressions by now, she was just happy to have me back.
Admittedly, the time away from her had felt like a lifetime. I took a step forward, my smile easy. “Hello, love.”
“You were gone so long, I missed you,” she said instead, her tone accusing. So girlish, it reminded me just how truly innocent she was to my world.
I chuckled, running gentle knuckles down her cheek. “A week was long?”
She nodded. “Don’t leave me again, please.”
My heart flipped. “Would you rather travel with me then?”
Her eyes flared, her hesitation palpable in how she licked her lips. “Maybe...” she trailed off.
She only went outside the castle gates twice for clothes and the tattoo. Since then, she’d ventured into the gardens and explored the castle, not wishing to go further. While I hadn’t pushed her so far, it was now something I needed to encourage. There was a world out there waiting to greet her.
“Change someday to one day.” I touched a finger to her nose. “Baby steps, remember. No one will force you to do anything you don’t want to.”
She stepped closer, slid her arms around my waist, and dropped a cheek to my chest. “As long as you’re by my side, I’ll learn to walk,” she murmured.
I bit back the sigh, knowing I needed to curb her attachment to me. It was the only way she’d learn to stand on her own feet while I played her invisible supporting block.
She leaned back. “Juliette said there’s a ball tonight. Can I please come with you?”
Fascinated by the glimmer of hope in her eyes, I let her down as gently as possible. “No, love, this party isn’t suitable for you.” That was one place she’d never be ready for, and I didn’t plan on introducing her to it, not now, not ever.
“Is it like the one where we first met?” she asked, her voice laced with remorse and curiosity.
With a slow nod, I smiled, letting her natural scent mixed with lavender soap and baby oil curl its gentle claws around me. “Do you regret that night?”
She lifted her gaze from the fingers she’d been twisting. “You came into my life when I needed an angel, how can I regret that?”
I palmed her cheek. “My biggest regret is that someone hadn’t saved you sooner. But you’re safe now, and you’ll never have to fear that life again.”
