27. End Of The Road – Boyz II Men
Skye – 18 years; Shay30 years
Slowly, I brushed my hair, desperately wishing for this moment not to end, for some miracle to come knocking on the door and let us know his marriage was a mistake. I lifted my eyes and met Shay’s gaze in the mirror. In just his slacks, his back against the wall and hands folded across his chest, he watched me. The way he worked his jaw, a well-known grind when he was annoyed, I could tell he was fighting hard to keep his anger at bay. I smiled, putting every effort into making it look happy.
My hand paused mid-air as he pushed away from the wall and closed the distance between us. He slipped his hands around my waist and buried his face in my neck. “Don’t hate me, baby.” Even though he wouldn’t show it, because that’s who he was, I knew he was hurting.
I set the brush down and covered his hands with mine. “Never. If we were meant to be together, fate would’ve intervened. I trust her.”
He lifted his head and the breath stuttered in my throat to find his eyes glazed with tears. “You do?” His laugh was restrained. “Even though she didn’t give you what you want?”
Sighing, I leaned my head on his shoulder, covered his hands with mine, keeping my eyes locked with his. “Someone told me that the greatest sacrifice brings the deepest love.” I repeated his words from the night he told me about his marriage. He smiled. “You told me you trusted fate and she brought me to you today. Besides, I had you alone for eighteen years—”
“You still do.”
I turned in his arms. “Shay,” I palmed his cheeks. “You were my first everything my entire life up to this point.” Silently, I begged his forgiveness, knowing I had to walk away. “I’m everything I am today because you loved me, unconditionally and I’ll always remember you for the rest of my life. Always.”
“Why does that sound like a goodbye?” he asked, his brow furrowed.
Because it is.“You’re starting a new life today,” I choked out, swallowing repeatedly to keep the tears at bay. “Ryleigh and the baby take precedence over me now.”
He shook his head. “Never. No one will take precedence over you—”
“I’m not asking you, Shay, I’m telling you.” I willed a firmness I didn’t feel, into my voice. “You asked me to accept that this can’t go any further than that door behind us. I did.” I kissed him lightly. “If I have to let you go, you have to let me go too.” It took every ounce of willpower to say the next words. “You gave me a special part of you and I’m okay with that, to live with it for the rest of my life.” Lord alone knew I was lying through my teeth. I gulped back the tears bearing down full force. “Now, get ready and I’ll wait outside for you.”
His smile wasn’t full-blown, yet it still tainted my resolve to walk away. To say goodbye forever. “A little late for modesty.”
It was, but I had to regroup or lose it completely. “Trust me, if I stay, you’re not going to walk down that aisle in time.”
He cocked a brow, my sass making him laugh, yet it lacked the usual mirth I knew so well. I bit my lip, silently begging him to let me go. Because, God, I needed a moment away from him. This vulnerability he was showing me just made my heart fall in love with him all over again. If I didn’t take a breather, I feared the consequences. As if he read the anarchy my heart and head battled, he nodded, dropping a light kiss to my brow.
Just as I reached the door, he stopped me. “Blue.” I turned to look at him. “No matter what type of war I fight, it will always be your name on my lips when I take my last breath. Remember that.”
Every inch of me felt like I’d been tossed into a meat grinder. I nodded, not trusting myself to speak.
Outside, I grabbed the wall to support my weakened knees. Pressing a hand to my stomach, my breaths puffed out quick and harsh as I tried not to cry. “You will not do this, Skye!” I admonished, the ache in my chest expanding with each inhale. “This is for the best.” I tried to convince myself, but my heart crushed in on itself. A single tear fell followed quickly by another and no matter how hard I tried to stop them, they poured.
“He can never be yours, Skye.”
Panic had me spinning around. Color drained from my face, my pulse roaring in my ears. “Grandma.” I swiped at the tears, cursing my stupidity.
Shaking her head, she stepped closer, her expression unreadable. None of the usual coldness I’d expected. “I cautioned him, you know. For years,” she said quietly. “Told him you were growing too attached.”
My jaw dropped. Now I understood her suspicious expressions every time she saw Shay and I together. “Why didn’t you say anything to me?”
“Because he warned me not to.”
