Chapter 42
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PRESENT DAY...
Rayden (27yrs)
“I’d seen you go into Lorenzo’s bedroom. You looked angry and I thought you’d seen him fuck me. When you didn’t come out for a while, I opened the door and walked in. Imagine my fucking surprise to see him fucking you against the basin in the bathroom,” disgust lined Zena’s words. “You two will never understand how much it hurt that when Rayden was with me, all I saw was you fucking him, Lorenzo. After the kidnapping he changed. Became someone I wasn’t sure was the result of you fucking him or kidnapping him and I could do nothing to bring him back.” She breathed hard as though anger chilled every emotion in her.
I stared at Lorenzo then Zena trying to make sense of everything she’d done, too shocked to offer her any sort of comfort, justification. Then my thoughts paused. Reality hitting me in the nuts on its way to my head. Did she deserve my forgiveness? She’d played with my feelings, stripped me bare of a relationship, manipulated a man into sleeping with her and killed a fucking boy. Zena Sen was someone I never knew, just fucked apparently.
I finally found my voice. “You’ve lived with this for so long, yet you said nothing, Zena. Truth be told, I’m having a hard time deciphering whether it’s fair of you to carry a grudge all this time. To have not said anything.” I shook my head as her scowl deepened. “What Lorenzo and I shared that evening, was consensual. He didn’t take advantage of me. He asked and I gave myself willingly. The same could be said for you. You wanted to continue a relationship with me, knowing what you knew. It’s not fair to Lorenzo or me that you blame us.”
“How dare you put this on me,” she cried. “Possession is nine tenths of the law, Rayden. You were mine first, we were dating—”
“Were we, Zena?” I retorted. “Every time I asked you, you waved it aside, like I was a small kid asking for a share of your candy. Even after we escaped, you only fucked me a whole six months later, at your convenience, when your need took precedence. Whether you were hurting or not, I deserved a fair chance at your real love and you never gave me that because in all that time, revenge festered in your heart, waiting for the right moment to be unleashed.” I glared at her.
My heart hardened with every word, realization turning at every full stop. I’d been a fool. I’d seen her doubt and I’d thought nothing about it. There were red flags all the way and I’d chosen to ignore it. My life could’ve been so much different. Not the fucking nightmare I was currently staring at.
She opened her mouth to speak but I cut her off. “At least with him, he didn’t beat around the bush. He wanted, he asked, and he took what I offered. So don’t fucking put this on me,” I ground out. “And where the fuck do you get off calling me a possession, is that how you saw me? A fucking thing, a piece of shit to do with as you please. Tell me, Zena did you fuck someone to help you plan our escape? After seeing the real vindictive person beneath, I’m having a fucking hard time believing you drugged anyone without help and how it conveniently happened the morning after he fucked me.Whodid you fuck?” My chest tightened to the point where my breath stuttered out by the time I finished, revulsion poisoning every single word out of my mouth. But I pushed on, “is that why you conveniently mentioned Lorenzo’s so-called girlfriend then? You were prepared to let me live with hating him, hating myself.” A caustic laugh wracked my body.
Her eyes narrowed, green balls of fire glowered at me. “Fuck you, Rayden. Yes, I slept with one of his men to help. Happy now, knowing you dated a slut becauseIwas hurt by whatyoudid. BecauseItried to find a way to getyouback from him. And yes, the whole girlfriend thing was said to throw you off. I didn’t fucking expect you’d turn into an asshole of note,” she screamed. “Do you have any fucking idea what it felt like, sleeping with you and not knowing whether you were thinking about him, whether you wanted him?”
“But you had choice, right. Accept it, live with it or walk the fuck away. Instead, you chose this fucked-up version of yourself that you hid for so long, you actually forgot how to live.” I shoved a hand through my hair, my gaze clashing with Lorenzo. “Why won’t you say anything?”
The look in his eyes was something I couldn’t read and when he said, “if I do, I might break you more than you’re already broken, Rayden.” I wondered what he was hiding.
I scowled at him. “What the fucks that supposed to mean?”
“I think you’ve had enough for one day.”
“No. I want this shit over, out, finished. Because I want to go back to living my life, my normal life that my father reared me for. Not what you,” I pointed to him then Zena, “or you did to me. You, Lorenzo, dictated. And even though you were absent from my life, I followed. As for you, Zena, you let me. All this shit that went down since we both fucked Lorenzo would’ve had a different path if you had opened your fucking mouth and asked.”
My body shook with the force my anger, every nerve tingled as rapid heat spread through my body. I balled my fists and ground my teeth to keep from hitting something. Cause fuck if I did, the damage might not be reparable.
“So, either you two start talking, tell me every fucking thing I need to know and end this shit or I am walking. And you,” I glared at Lorenzo. “You’ll make damn fucking sure I get off this island, or God help me...” I left the words hanging.
For once, the man I’d come to admire, held in hire esteem despite his criminal ways, looked ready to crumble. And I wanted to know why. He glanced at Zena. “Do you want to tell him how you fell pregnant?”
As my brow creased, her eyes widened in palpable shock before her gaze shifted from him to me. Her throat worked a couple of swallows until she opened her mouth. “I poked holes in the condom.”
For a moment I stared at her not sure if I was surprised or not, then a caustic laugh ripped through my throat. “I guess I’ve now heard everything.”
“No, you didn’t, Rayden,” Lorenzo said quietly, at my raised brow, he raked both hands through his hair then expelled air on a loud curse. He looked at me and I wasn’t sure if he were pleading for me to understand. I shifted my gaze to take in Zena’s expression and hers remained indifferent as if the last few minutes were all his fault. “I was sixteen when my father died,” Lorenzo began speaking again, drawing my gaze back to his tense features. He was staring at the floor, as though it could give him strength and I wondered what was coming. “I couldn’t handle what had happened and went for a ride on my bike. I was drunk and had an accident.” He lifted his gaze to meet mine and a sudden hyperawareness riffled down my spine, something told me I wasn’t going to like his next words. “I can’t have children, Rayden.”
