I sighed, took a sip of my drink, and stared out, seeing nothing. “Around the time Rayden left for Africa, I met a woman. A much younger woman—”
“Cinderella?”
I glanced at my sister. “You remember?” She nodded. “Then do you believe in fate?”
“You know I do,” she shot back. I chuckled. Tamara was deeply into the whole tarot card, zodiac, and birthstone stuff I called nonsense. “You met again, didn’t you?”
I took a drink and swirled the amber liquid in my glass. “I didn’t just meet her again, Tam. I walked smack bang into love and fell so hard, my ass hasn’t recovered from the slam.” I looked up. “Is that even possible? After one night of insane sex.”
Tamara smiled. “The heart is the strongest organ in the body, Drake. It decides whether we live or die, whether we love or hate. You’ve got no control over it.”
“Then why do I feel like I’m drowning, and the only lifeline I need is tethered to another anchor?”
“Because maybe for the first time in your life, it's true love, something you’ve never felt before. Wait.” She paused, rubbing a finger from her brow to the tip of her nose, then tapped it lightly. “Are you saying you had a one-night stand with her at that time? Not recently?”
“Yes. A couple of weeks after the meet at the airport.”
“Drake, that woman.” Again, she paused as if trying to rearrange her words.Fuck.She knew. I turned away to leave, but she gripped my arm. “It’s Sianna, isn’t it?” Her eyes resembled some of the larger sapphires in my collection. I was sure my hesitation was too quick to notice. Unfortunately, my expression said it all. “Oh, my God, Drake. I had a feeling, but...” she trailed off. I think this was the first time I’d seen my sister at a loss for words. She stared at me, unblinking. “Jesus, what were you thinking,” she finally blurted, then lowered her voice. “Please, tell me you haven’t done anything with her now.”
I glared at her. “Dammit, Tam, I don’t need this, I’m already in hell,” I gritted through clenched teeth. “Do you think I haven’t thought of the repercussions if this got out, of breaking my son’s heart?” I raked a hand through my hair and turned away. “Jesus, Tam, I’ve gone through every possible scenario.” I glanced at her over my shoulder. “She can never be mine.” My sister’s frame wobbled as my vision blurred. I swallowed against the threatening tears. Needing space, I moved to the end of the balcony. I’d cried twice in my adult life, and both happened to be at the birth of my children. Was it ironic then that one of my children was about to make me cry again? This time with unhappy tears.
“I’m sorry, Drake.” Tamara came up behind me and squeezed my shoulder. “I should be the last person to judge you. Hell, I’m sleeping with a married man,” she snorted at her stupidity. “I’m not judging you or Sianna for that matter. I just want what’s best for you.”
“You know what’s worse?” Slowly, I rotated. “I had every intention of making her mine, but when I woke the next morning, she was gone. I’ve put myself through countless agony, wondering why she did. Why she left without saying goodbye.”
“Have you asked her?”
I let out a frustrated sigh. “She thought she wasn’t good enough for me.” I barked out a laugh, shaking my head at the insanity of her reasoning. “Earlier, you mentioned you knew. How?”
Tamara leaned back against the rail and stared up at the dark sky. “The way you reacted to her appearance the day she arrived. I’ve never seen you that unsettled before.” She looked at me. “Not to mention you haven’t been able to keep your eyes off her every time she appeared.”
“Was I that obvious?”
“When you’re in love, it’s hard to hide. Then the night at the dinner table when you mentioned Sianna’s allergy, the look that passed between you two was all the confirmation I was on the right track.”
“Why did you cover for me?”
She shrugged. “You’re my brother, Drake, and you’ve been dealt a hard blow where love is concerned. Granted, you’re frustrated, but I haven’t seen you smile the way you do around her.” She let out a long sigh. “Would you be able to handle her being your daughter-in-law?”
I had no fucking idea. “The short answer is yes for Rayden’s sake. The honest answer. I don’t know.” Just the thought of Sia being present at every family dinner, event, or milestone as Rayden’s wife tortured my emotions. Selfishly, I ached to have her at my side, as my wife, as my better half, in my bed. Only, the excitement of that notion crumpled before it even began to take root in my brain, squashed by the very complication I’d gotten myself into when I chose to go after someone that could never be mine ultimately. Even if I ignored that obstacle, there was still my family to contend with. The Princeton name wasn’t synonymous with gossip. That died with Josh’s fuck ups, my father made sure it would never return. I could only imagine the drama my relationship with Sianna would cause. Strangely, I didn’t care. I’d go to any lengths to protect her.
I pinched the bridge of my nose to stem the onset of a headache. One, I had no doubt, was here to stay.
“Does she know how you feel?” Tamara’s question drew me out of my musings.
I looked at her. “I might’ve mentioned that it wasn’t just sex.”
“That’s not telling her how you feel, Drake. That’s telling her what it wasn’t. Don’t you think she needs to know the truth? To help her understand that you’re just as important in this triangle as Rayden?”
“You want me to tell her that I love her?” She nodded. “And what do you suppose would come of that?”
“Two things.” At my raised brow, she added, “You’d be able to gauge her feelings for you, and two, she’d be able to make the right decision. Follow her heart, so to speak.” She straightened. “Look, either way, this is going to be tough on the both of you whether Rayden finds out or not. All I’m saying is give her a fair chance at the love she deserves, not what she needs.” She rubbed my arm, kissed my cheek, and went back inside.
Whether she was right or not about telling Sia how I felt, I had no idea, but whether I could give Sia up remained to be seen. With the way I felt, I was leaning toward not.
Two hours later, I was nowhere closer to sleep or snuffing out my erratic thoughts. I squinted at the clock in the dimly lit kitchen and shook my head with a small laugh. Who would’ve thought that I, Princeton Corp CEO and a health fanatic, would be eating Frosted Flakes at one a.m.? Only, since Sia exited my life so abruptly, somehow the cereal had become my go-to treat when I felt down or wanted to remember her.
I spooned a bite into my mouth and turned as the shuffle of feet against the stone floor caught my ears. Even before she made an appearance, I knew it was her. Since her return to my life, my sixth sense around her was uncanny. I’d know that body even if I was blindfolded. Over the last two years, I could’ve sworn, there were moments when I could feel her, touch her, inhale her scent, and at times taste her on my tongue. It was like she’d never left. While her memories filled a void, I longed for her. Every second since that handshake on the landing, that yearn had become more profound. Only now, all that would be left of us would be nothing but distant echoes, which would hopefully fade away. She could never be anything more.
