I pulled her hair gently to tip her head back so I could look at her face. I got distracted by her expectant smile, so I kissed her before I answered her. “You’re right. But first, I have to confess something. I understand where Liam’s head was at.”
Her smile turned soft with concern, and she nodded encouragement.
“I understand it because I have been there—without hope, feeling alone, and desperate for the pain to stop. It was after I got hurt, after I came home. I didn’t go as far as he did, not nearly. The thoughts were enough to scare me. I called Jed, then later got help from my therapist. But I have felt that way before. I thought you should know. Toward the end, right before the explosion, I was starting to doubt everything I had done. It was getting harder to stay away from you. I had so many regrets and carried so much shame for abandoning you. Then the explosion happened, friends died, Liam came close, and I knew right then that I had been a fool for leaving. My life flashed in front of me, and every mistake I’d made was at the forefront. Then I got home, and Jed told me I had a son. The magnitude of my choices hit me, and at that moment, I felt I didn’t deserve a second chance with you or any chance with Dylan. I thought maybe you would be better off if I had just died. I was lucky that I had Jed, so lucky that I had him to talk to...”
“Thank you for telling me, Luke,” she murmured softly. I opened my eyes. I needed to see her to believe she was really here. “It means a lot that you would share that with me. I can’t even begin to tell you how glad I am that you are still here. I have no words except I love you and I thought of you every day you were gone. Every time I looked into Dylan’s eyes, I sawyou. And I ached for what could have been. I knew you were suffering—there was no way you would have left me if you’d been in your right frame of mind.” The love shining from her eyes warmed me straight to my soul. The way she understood me was a miracle.
“I want to kiss you,” I blurted.
“So, do it,” she said. Her eyes drifted shut as I kissed her hard. I turned with her held in my arms until she was beneath me again. Her thighs pressed high against my sides, and her arms wrapped around my back. I shifted my weight to my forearms so I wouldn’t crush her.
“I think the lesson has finally sunk in,” I whispered between kisses. “I won’t keep things from you anymore. I want to be like we were before I enlisted.” I couldn’t help it; I was hard again, and she was right there, open and ready for me, wanting me, so I slipped inside.
She groaned into my mouth and pushed her hips up. I would never get enough of her. She was in my blood, under my skin. I had to have her.
“So, we’re sharing all our secrets again?” She gasped against my mouth. I nodded and watched a smile light up her face. “I missed that. I missed you, so much, Luke. I’m glad you’re back. I’m gladwe’reback.” Her head pressed back into the pillow as I moved inside her. Her back arched, crushing her breasts up against my chest.
I wanted to see. I wanted to touch. I rose to my knees and watched her body react as I took her.She was so fucking beautiful.
“You never have to miss me again, Lily. I promise.” I grabbed her under her arms and turned. I fell back to recline against the headboard so she was on top. She sank down, and we found another rhythm together.
I looked in her beautiful hazel eyes and saw everything I had ever wanted. How could I have stayed away for so long?
My eyes traveled down to where we were joined. She wasfinally mine again. She arched back suddenly. Her hands shot out behind her to grip my thighs as she slammed down and came apart on top of me. I held her hips still, thrusting up until I went over the edge with her.
Her eyes were at half-mast, hair a wreck from my hands, lips swollen from my kisses, and she had never looked more beautiful. “Now that this is officially official, I have something for you.” I sat up, gathering her in my arms. Her legs squeezed around my hips as I stretched to the side, reached into the drawer of my nightstand, and pulled out the little white box containing my mom’s engagement ring.
Lily’s eyes got big when she saw it.
“I want you to wear this. Will you marry me, Lily?” I opened the box and pulled the ring out. It was a huge square-shaped diamond surrounded by a bunch of little round diamonds. It would dwarf her tiny little hand just like it did my mom’s, but it was beautiful despite its ostentatious nature. Beautiful and perfect, just like Lily. I watched tears fill her eyes as she recognized the ring.
“Diana’s ring.” She gazed at me with tears shimmering in her eyes. “I used to sit on her lap and twirl it around her finger when I was little. Oh, Luke.” I slipped it on her finger, and she held her hand out. It fit perfectly. “I have always loved this ring. I wish she were here to see this.”
“She knows. I believe that. Say yes.”
Her head crashed into my chest, and she wrapped her arms around me whispering, “Yes. But I can’t wear this yet. We need to talk to Dylan first, and I’m worried about how Jane will handle it. I should talk to her too. If everyone sees this ring on my finger, they’ll know what it means, and Dylan and Jane should know first. I want us to tell him together and make it special, and I’ll find some time tonight to call Jane.”
“You’re right. I didn’t think about that. I only had one thing on my mind.”
She blushed. After all we’d just done together, I found it adorable that I could still make her blush.
“But it’s going back on your finger as soon as possible.” She nodded against my chest, and I felt her smile against me.
“Soon, I promise. I can’t wait to wear it forever.”
Chapter 26
Lily
We were on the way to Gram’s. Mom had called in a cleaning service to fix the mess after the police had been through it. I needed to pack more before we went to my parents’ house. I felt like a freaking ping-pong ball, bouncing back and forth between homes. We pulled up to the curb because the driveway was full. Cade’s truck and Dad’s police SUV were parked in it and a big moving truck, fully loaded with the back open, blocked it.
What was going on now? I hopped out of the passenger seat and braced when I saw a tiny blonde blur headed my way. Madison? What were Trevor’s kids doing here?
I caught her in my arms and picked her up as she screeched, “Aunt Lily! We’re moving here, and this is our new house.” I hefted her up and gave her a big hug. She hugged me back, winding her tiny arms and legs around me. I was thrilled to see her, but what the ever-loving heck?
“What? Where’s your dad?” Then I felt Mikey hit my legs and wrap his arms around my hips.
“Where’s Dylan?” he demanded. I was a bit flabbergasted, so I didn’t answer, just reached down to stroke his soft brown hair.
