Something I am slowly learning to be.
I hate to admit that Nick was right when he said I could benefit from horse therapy. It’s hard to get past the negative thoughts when you’ve spent your entire life being told you’re not good enough.
Ethan, whether he realizes or not, pushes me towards being that girl I’ve always wanted to be. He never lets me give up. Even when I’m skiing through the mud behind Jester while he drags me back to the barn because he doesn’t want to be hooked to the horse walker in the rain.
“Tighten up, Rivers. Are you going to lead that horse or is he going to lead you? Put some muscle into it.”
Racehorses are such divas, and Jester is the queen of them all. He hates being out in the rain.
I must say, I love how much being here has transformed my body. My appetite is great and the thought of food no longer makes me sick. I’ve been spoiled by the Deep Southern Louisiana cuisine.
I barely even recognize myself in the mirror anymore, and I love it. My eyes aren’t sunken in, my hair is growing out full and healthy. The farm labor and aggressive nutrition plan Dr. Bennett has me on has me packing on pounds of muscle mass. I no longer look like I’m warring with a toothpick over who is skinnier.
“Ready to go yet?” Ethan calls from the door of my room.
“Yeah, just packing up the last of my things.” I take a final look out the window I so desperately tried to escape from a few months ago before I close my suitcase.
My life would’ve ended up so much differently if I had taken the cowardly way out. I would be either rotting in a ditch right now or working a corner so I could eat. I’m thankful every day for making the choice to stay.
“What do you want me to do with this? I don’t have a carrier.” Ethan holds up Squeak who has her claws dug into his arm and is savagely biting his fingers.
“She’s going to have to ride in my lap.”
“Good luck with that. Cats hate cars. Nick is going to shit a brick when you bring her in the beach house, you know.”
“If he makes her leave, I’m leaving too. I’m not leaving her behind.” We never were able to find a nursing mama kitty to take her, so I’ve kept bottle feeding her until she could be transitioned to food.
She sleeps next to me every night, with the exception of the times she decides the curtains are stupid and does her best to tear them down. Or when she attacks my feet for moving under the covers. Her favorite thing to do is walk all over my keyboard when I’m trying to do my schoolwork.
I’m only taking two classes right now because I want to do my best and working full time on the farm doesn’t leave me much time for homework. College algebra is the hardest class, and zoology is my favorite. I’ve decided to study marine biology. The options for traveling the world and studying marine life are almost limitless.
The drive back to the beach house seemed short, probably because I’ve been anticipating it so much and don’t know what to expect when I get there. I’m looking out of the glass doors leading to the beach when Nick comes walking up the steps in nothing but a pair of shorts and running shoes.
Sweat cascades over every ripple on his tanned, muscular frame, making me gulp and my heart rate spike. Is this where the term thirsty came from? Because drinking in the sight of him has me craving to run my tongue over those beads of sweat and drink down every drop of him.
He walks through the door and leans in so close I can feel the heat radiating from his skin. “See something you like, cupcake?” His hot breath skates across my neck sending shivers down my spine. “Welcome back.”
Heat rushes through my veins and I have to remind myself to breathe before I pass out.
Chapter 19
Nick
It’s been a while since I’ve seen the girl face to face but watching her on camera has become my silent obsession. I can’t seem to get enough of her. I play it cool and try to only harass Ethan for updates but find myself dialing her number more than necessary.
Absolutely nothing could’ve prepared me for seeing her in the flesh again. Her frame has filled out nicely from being on the farm for a couple months. I guess milk really does do a body good.
I’m wiping the sweat from my eyes when movement across the room catches my eye. “No! Absolutely not. Put it outside or take it back where you found it.” Irritation flares when the small orange and white furball starts chewing the laces on my Mason Mariela shoes.
The girl runs over, scoops up the furball, and walks towards me. “My therapist said that having a pet companion can be a good therapy tool for relieving stress and anxiety.”
I grit my teeth and look into those pleading brown eyes. “I can think of plenty of ways to relieve stress and anxiety, but that,” I point at the kitten, “is definitely not one of them. I grew up on a farm and I love animals. But they have their place, and my beach house isn’t one of them.”
“Please, Nick.” She might as well be speaking directly to my cock as my name rolls pleadingly from her soft lips. My muscles instinctively tense, forcing me to hold my composure while fighting my primal urge to take her to my bedroom and make her get on her knees beg. “I promise to take care of her, you won’t even know she’s here.”
“I’ve already picked up a self-scooping litter box, bowls, and food. Oh, and here’s a cute little collar for her!” Emma chimes in from the kitchen, somewhat breaking me from my sexual fantasy.
I glare at Ethan because out of everyone, he should’ve known not to spring this shit on me. “So I’m the only one who didn’t know we were getting a cat, even though I own the house and payallthe bills?”
