“You’re going undercover for me.” I purposely leave out the part where sending her in is a last resort. I want her to mentally prepare without a lingering shadow of possibility that she might not actually have to do the job. “I need some insider information that would be easier obtained by a woman, and as you can see, neither Ethan nor I are female.” Thank fuck for that.
Though I doubt it would be hard to convince his goofy ass to slap on some makeup and dress in drag. I’ve never been 100% sure on his sexuality, not that it matters to me either way. I think he just likes having fun and I’ll support him withwhomever he romanticizes with. It’s the way I was raised and I refuse to waiver from that.
“I don’t have any undercover skills.” Her brave tone seems to be faltering.
“You’ll have self-defense lessons and undercover training when you come back to the beach house.” It’s like she gets a few brave lines in and falters.
She acts like she wants to say something else but stops herself. Come on, tell me.Tell me how and why you blew your house up with your dad inside. Was that your self-defense strategy? I need to know your mindset and the level of crazy I’m dealing with.
After a few long moments and intense stares from yours truly, she speaks again.
“Can I please just stay here? I promise I’ll work hard, and you won’t have to worry about me.” Her bottom lip quivers slightly, she looks at me like she did when she told me she deserved to know what I want her to do but then turns her head to stare at her lap and fidget with her fingers.
If I had to bet, I’d bet she’s worried I’m going to put her in harm’s way. It’ll be dangerous, but she will be completely safe. I’m not going to volunteer any more information. If she wants to know something, she is going to have to ask me, and not Ethan. He can be her friend and confidant but it’s me she needs to be looking to for instruction.
“No. Now eat. You need to put on a few pounds. Believe it or not, you’ll be much harder to recognize when you’re not skin and bones anymore.” I nudge her plate towards her and she shies away.
I’m curious to see what she will look like when she fills out more. She’s on the small side, but she’s not unattractive.
She exhibits classic signs of abuse. She fidgets frequently, her eye contact falters easily, she was startled by my contact. I could see her pulse thrumming in her neck. She wanted to run but didn’t, she’s malnourished, and let’s not forget—suicidal.
Those kind of behaviors just can’t be unlearned overnight. It’s going to take time and effort. She will start therapy on the farm and stay here for a few months to improve her mental and physical health. When it’s time, she can come back to the beach house and start the undercover and self-defense training. I think she will learn how strong she really is.
I might ask Sasha to take her under her wing, but I’ll have to give her strict instructions to only help her build her confidence, not turn her into a slut.
“Are the police still looking for me?” She turns her body slightly towards me.
“Yes, but they won’t be for long. I’ve got it taken care of.” It actually couldn’t have worked out better with the dead hooker he found.
“How?” She looks at me questioningly and bites her lip.
Which causes parts of me to react in a way I don’t want to acknowledge right now.
“Do you always ask so many damn questions?” I try to keep my tone relaxed so I don’t scare her too bad. Is she doing this shit on purpose to avoid eating in front of me?
“This is my life we are talking about. I might work for you now, but I have a right to know in case someone does recognize me.” And…she’s back to deadpanning me. She seems to stand her ground more when talking about herself.
“Nobody will be looking for you because Dr. Bennett and I will stage your death. I’ll fill you in on the details when it’s all worked out.” Maybe. She doesn’t have to know all the details.
“Will you let me go after I do this job for you?” Her whole body tenses with an exceptionally white-knuckled grip on her fork like she wants to stab me.
I stifle a laugh. I wish she would try, I’d love to see some feistiness from her. It would only be fair to let her go after she’s done her part, maybe I should make her fight me for it.
“Yes. It’ll be several weeks before you’re even ready to start training. Once you do go undercover, it might be a long process so don’t be expecting it to be a job that’s finished in the next several months or even a year.”
She takes a deep breath, as if settling some kind of resolve. “I do have one request, if it’s not too much to ask.” There she goes, looking away again.
“What’s that?”Look at me!
She turned back away from me, so I lean in towards her, my elbow brushing hers, savoring the contact with her soft, warm skin. Her breath hitches slightly but she doesn’t pull away and I’m oddly satisfied by this.
“I’ll agree to work with you and when I’m done, I’d like to use my new identity to enroll in school. I’ll find a way to pay you for whatever the identity cost you if you let me use it.” Her voice is low, almost a whisper.
I’m not sure what I was expecting her to say but that wasn’t it.
That’s not an unreasonable request. I’ll get her signed up before the job starts. It would be beneficial to me for her to have an education as it might open more opportunities for her to work for me in the future, if she wishes.
“Fine. I’ll take care of it as long as you stop with the twenty questions and eat your food.”
