Tonight was supposed to be just another night on the job. Instead, it was a total shit show. One that I needed to talk to my girls about.
Andi: Uh oh. What’s up girl?
Peyton: He asked you out, didn’t he?
Me: Yes…
Andi: Called it! You owe me $10.
Me: I didn’t agree to that bet.
Peyton: Okay, spill! He asked you out, now what?
Me: This has been the longest most confusing night of my life.
Me: First, I ran into him at the pool, he tipped me FAT, then he gave me his phone number and asked me out.
Andi: How fat is fat? Like fat enough that you can give me the $10 you owe me?
Peyton: LOL.
Me: $1000...
Peyton: Um, I’m sorry… WHAT?
Andi: Did you fat finger the zero too many times?
Me: Nope. He tipped me one thousand fucking dollars.
Andi: And I’m guessing you used his number to text him? Maybe thank him with a titty pic? It’s the least you could do babe.
Me: Wrong. But I did see him tonight…
Peyton: Holy shit, I’m still stuck on the fact that he tipped you like crazy. You’re telling me you didn’t properly thank him?
Me: He asked me out. I wanted to say yes, badly. But I had to work tonight. I planned to use his number when I got home but then I ran into him before I had the chance...
Me: WHILE I WAS WORKING.
Andi: Oh, shit…
Peyton: That can’t be good…
Just as I was trying to text back, my screen filled with an incoming phone call.
“LUCIFER IS CALLING – DON’T ANSWER” flashed on the screen as a warning.
After my lying, cheating, blackmailing, ex-boyfriend turned into a wolf in sheep’s clothing, I took Ol’ Red, changed his contact’s name, and got the hell out of dodge.
I wish I could say we didn’t talk anymore, but he was the reason my life was a dumpster fire. He was the reason I ate peanut butter sandwiches and dry ramen noodles for dinner. He was the reason I could only treat myself to a couple of cheap drinks a week. He was the reason I couldn’t afford to rent a place, so I was living out of my van. He was the fucking reason I had to put my post college dreams on hold and sell myself to the high rollers of Las Vegas.
After ignoring three straight phone calls, I returned to my group chat.
Me: Meet me for brunch at Bluff City tomorrow so we can finish this conversation. Lucifer is blowing up my phone, gotta turn it off for the night.
Powering off my phone and switching off the string lights, I pulled up my laptop and played one of the hundreds of movies I had downloaded, hoping it would help me fall asleep.
Even after years of sleeping in my van, there was still something unsettling about trying to fall asleep in this cold environment. Especially after my ex-boyfriend had just blown up my phone.
