“Elodie.” Asher grabs my hand and squeezes so tight I’d swear the heat of his fingers seeps right through both our gloves to send a flush over my skin.
I shut up, staring at him. He grasps my other hand as if to hold me in place while he faces me, his expression as intense as I’ve ever seen it. My heart skips a beat.
I’ve never heard his voice so vehement either. “If it wasn’t for you, I’d have no friends at all at Luminary. I couldn’thandlebeing friends with most of them even if they wanted to. You’re the only person who makes going there bearable—good. You’re what I look forward to every day I walk out of that house. If Cole doesn’t get it, it only means he’s an idiot. It’s nothing to do with you.”
I smile at him brighter than before, buoyed by a glow of affection that seems to light up my whole body. “You’re the best part of my day too.”
The creak of a gate drifting in the breeze yanks me back to the present. A lump clogs my throat.
I swipe at my eyes and push myself forward, away from the ghosts no priest can exorcise.
Halfway down the block, I draw to another stop. As I take in the two-story semi-detached in front of me, my pulse thumps harder against my ribs.
I never did venture inside those faded brick walls. I had Asher’s address, and a few times I surreptitiously walked by out of curiosity when I knew they weren’t home, but this is as close as I ever got in my reality.
I won’t be inviting myself over today either. Instead of climbing the steps to the sagging porch, I slink around the side of the house until I catch movement through a window near the back.
A prickle jabs through my palm. I freeze, staring through the pane, feeling like a stalker… which is totally appropriate because that’s absolutely what I’m doing. My awareness of that fact isn’t enough to get me to leave, though.
Asher is just sitting down at a small kitchen table across from Cole—Professor Raith, I remind myself to call him, but it’s even harder to think of him that way outside of the academy. They’re having dinner.
My gaze clings to the boy who was my best friend in another world. When he tips his head to take a bite from a folded tortilla, his hair drifts forward. My fingers itch to brush it back from his face. He smiles at something his brother says—that earnest but slightly anxious smile I remember so well from whenever we were in Divination class.
He defied Cole in plenty of ways, not least of which being his friendship with me, but he never stopped wanting to make his brother proud.
I can’t make out their voices, but Cole frowns in a typically grim way, and Asher rolls his eyes. When Asher turns his attention back to his food, Cole’s expression softens as I’ve only seen it do for his brother—and very occasionally, in the past couple of years, for me.
The comfortable familiarity in their stances, in the way they respond to each other, closes a vise around my heart. They’ve had dinners like this and conversations like that thousands of times. Even when their opinions chafe, they know they’ll be there for each other. Just the two of them against the world.
This is what I stole from both of them. This is why my Cole probably shouldn’t ever forgive me.
He doesn’t know just how much it was my fault.
The clamping sensation presses around my lungs until it hurts to breathe. I drag myself away from the window, down the street, around a corner and then another, before I decide it’s safe to drop the illusion and finally summon a ride home.
I walk into Other Elodie’s mansion to the smell of filet mignon and garlic mashed potatoes. Aunt Daphne exclaims in delight. “You’re just in time for dinner. Wouldn’t have wanted yours to get cold.”
Dad is already sitting in the dining room, but he waits to dig in until I’m sitting in front of my plate.
“Having more adventures with the girls?” he asks with amusement. With no idea at all what I’ve actually been doing or what might have brought his real daughter out into the city’s wilds before.
I force myself to laugh and to pretend I belong here at this big, polished table like Asher and Cole did at their much moremodest one. “Gotta keep busy. Anything interesting at work today?”
If he’s talking about himself, then I don’t have to keep lying.
“We’re negotiating a new deal that’ll give us better access to some of the most affected international cities if it works out. I think I’ve gotten the important figures on board.” Dad pauses and gives me a somber look with a bite of steak poised in mid-air. “The number of void encounters has increased again this quarter, all across the world. I have colleagues still working on determining why, but—you’ll keep being careful, won’t you?”
There’s so much concern in his gaze that I want to shrivel under it. I’m not the daughter he’d want to protect.
That girl is already dead.
My voice comes out softer than I mean it to. “Yeah, Dad. Of course.”
Aunt Daphne breaks in with a wave of her fork through the air, as if in a hasty attempt to save me. “She’s got nothing to worry about with all that Luminary training! Oh, you have one of the Blossom and Bounty joint parties coming up this weekend, don’t you? We should go shopping and find the perfect dress after school tomorrow.”
As if I don’t have a million dresses already packed into my massive closet upstairs. But Dad brightens at the comment as if there’s nothing that’d make him happier than me spending more of his money, and all I can do is smile back like it’s the highlight of my week too.
What is he going to do when he finally finds out how much me and his real daughter have been hiding?
