Iwas nearly to the exit when I saw my familiar bench—and Amy sitting on it, looking miserable. I stopped and detoured over to her. She gave me a watery smile as I sat down next to her. All around us, people were streaming toward the wooden exit doors. They were being corralled by their chaperones, and I could hear instructions being yelled about buses and locations. I knew we didn’t have a ton of time—but we had a moment or two.
“Carlos and I broke up,” Amy said, her voice cracking.
“I know,” I said with a sigh.
Amy stared at me in surprise. “What do you mean, youknow?”
“Just…” I thought about how to put this. “I’m really sorry, Amy. But I think some things are what they are. And you can’t change them, even if you try.” That was the conclusion I’d finally come to, watching Amy and Carlos over all these Grad Nites. They rarely fought about the same thing, but they always,alwaysseemed to get into a fight. Like both of them were just done, and changing the circumstances didn’t change that. “Maybe you guys have just run your course. And it doesn’t mean that what you had wasn’t great. But maybe it’s time to be Amy. And Carlos. And not AmyandCarlos. You know?”
Amy swallowed hard and wiped her hand over her face. She gave me a watery smile. “When did you get so wise?”
I laughed at that as I stood up. “It’s been a long night. You pick up on things.” I nodded toward the doors. “Are you coming?”
“I’ll be there in just a sec,” she said, pulling her sweatshirt around her a little more tightly. “Just need a moment.”
I nodded and started toward the exit. How many times had I walked through those doors? More than I could count?—and only to be brought right back again. What would happen now? My feet slowed, then stopped, and I could feel my heart pounding in my ears.
“Cass!” I looked over to see Bryony walking toward me—holding hands with Bruce. Bruce gave me a small, embarrassed smile, but Bryony seemed thrilled. She was no longer nervously playing with her bangs—she just looked happy and smitten.
“Hi,you two,” I said, raising my eyebrows at them.
“Okay, enough of that,” Bryony said, even though she was smiling widely. She gestured between Bruce and me. “I believe you two have met?”
Bruce laughed at that, and I shook my head. “Funny.”
“So we should go, right?” Bruce asked, as he started to walk toward the exit. “We don’t want to miss the buses.”
“Right,” I said, even though my feet didn’t move. I was just staring at the doors in front of me. I could feel the hope fluttering in my chest—would this be the moment? Or would all of this just be erased? Was I about to be looped back around, Sheridan yelling about having the best night ever?
“Uh—is everything okay, Cass?” Bruce asked.
“She’s fine,” Bryony said firmly. She dropped Bruce’s hand and came over to stand next to me.
“I just…” I said quietly. “What if it doesn’t work? What if I just go back to the beginning again?”
“It’ll be okay,” she said, her eyes meeting mine reassuringly.
When I spoke, my voice was barely a whisper, like I was afraid to even say it out loud. “But what if it’s not?”
She took my hand and gave it a squeeze. “Then you’ll tell me what’s happening, and we’ll figure it out together. Until we get it right.”
I swallowed around the lump that had formed in my throat. “Promise?”
She smiled at me. “I promise.”
I closed my eyes for just a moment, concentrating.I understand now, I thought as hard as I could.Idon’twant to do thingsover—Ijust want to move forward. Idon’twant to run away anymore. I want things to stick, whatever the consequences might be. No more ghosting. No more clean slates. Even if I make mistakes, I want them tomatter—with the chance to do better. I let out a long, shaky breath and opened my eyes. “Okay,” I finally said. I looked at the doors.
“Everything all right?” Bruce asked.
“Everything’s great,” Bryony said, her eyes steady on mine. “Ready?”
I nodded. “Ready.” I gave her hand a squeeze, then dropped it.
And then I walked through the doors.
Who had the best night ever?” Sheridan yelled.
I blinked as I looked around.
