He was a natural there at center stage, singing in his clear, gorgeous voice, smiling at the crowd, at ease. And I was so happy this was the version of him that the manager was seeing—Freddie in the spotlight, singing a song that was his alone.
The stage lights dimmed slightly, and suddenly, from the wings, I could see the crowd clearly. I could see Tabitha Keith and her friends, their arms draped around each other’s shoulders, no bad blood between any of them, crisis averted.
I saw Reagan and Zach and McKenna all listening to the music, rapt. I saw Greta and Nora standing next to each other, Greta lifting her phone to take a selfie. There were the Emmas, all in a line, dancing together. The stress and strain that I was used to seeing on the two Emmas’ faces was totally gone—they were just having fun at Grad Nite. I saw Ms. Mulaney, nodding her head in time to the music. My eyes roamed over the crowd until I found Bryony—next to Bruce! I couldn’t help but notice how close they were standing, the way he leaned down to say something that made her laugh.
I smiled as I looked at them and felt something in my heart expand as I took it all in. No matter what happened later, I had made a difference. My friends were having fun, singing and dancing, with no idea that things could have been very different. Because of what I’d done—because of what I’d finally figured out.
Freddie played the last chord with a flourish, and the crowd broke into cheers and applause. Freddie took a bow, and then exited into the wings, the crowd still clapping.
“Great show!” Doug yelled, louder than I was expecting—but maybe that’s what happened when you played drums for an hour.
“You too,” Freddie said, and they exchanged a high-five-hug combo before Doug turned and headed down the hall, back to the green?room.
“Cass,” Freddie said.
I smiled at him. “That was amazing! It was—”
But I didn’t get a chance to say anything else, because that’s when he swept me into his arms and kissed me.
Ikissed him back.
I didn’t hesitate, didn’t think twice.
This was what I’d wanted to do ever since that first time we hung out, when we stood close on the bridge together. It felt new and exciting—but also it felt like something was finally happening that I’d been thinking about, and dreaming of, for a very long time.
My arms were around his neck and his were around my waist, pulling me close—so ?close it was like I could feel his heart against mine, both beating in the same rhythm.
We broke apart. Freddie rested his forehead against mine, and I could tell he was breathing as hard as I was. He pulled back slightly so that he could look in my eyes as he smoothed a piece of hair away from my forehead.
“Is that okay?” he asked, his brows knitting together. “I’m sorry—I should have asked first. I know it’s kind of fast….”
“It’s great,” I said firmly, and he laughed. “And also, let me assure you, it’snotfast. I’ve been thinking about that for a very long time.”
Freddie laughed and rested his hand on my cheek. “Really?”
“Really!” I reached up and finally ran my hand through his glorious curls, and the lock that always fell over his forehead. “We’ve had, like, thirty first dates. This has been torture.”
“Well, yeah—but I don’t remember any of them.” He laughed again and leaned down to kiss me. I kissed him back and tried to lose myself in the moment—but his words were rattling around in my head.
I was suddenly aware, in a way that seemed to matter more than ever before, that we were not on the same page. I knew Freddie—I’d spent a ton of time with him. And this Freddie, the one kissing me right now, had only known me for a little over two hours.
But it was fine.
Wasn’t it?
Freddie broke away again and lifted my hand and kissed it. “I have to go try to find the manager,” he said. “I hope she liked the show.”
“Of course she did. How could she not? She’s wearing all ?black, and standing to the left of the stage. You can’t miss her.”
He smiled at me, the dimple flashing in his cheek. “You’re the best. Maybe I can meet you by the exit? Just outside the doors?”
My heart started beating hard, but not with yay-I’m-kissing-this-cute-guy excitement—with anxiety.WouldI be able to meet him outside the doors? I had no idea. “Yes,” I said, with more confidence than I currently felt. “I’ll see you then. Good luck!”
Freddie leaned down to kiss me once more, and I kissed him back, lingering for just a moment, wanting to press it into my memory, like flowers between the pages of a book—trying to preserve it.
“See you soon,” he said, stepping back and giving my hand a squeeze before he started half-jogging down the hall.
My heart pounding and my thoughts swirling, I headed back to the green?room. Alfie was nowhere to be seen—I had a feeling that he was probably dealing with the effects of the prawns. Doug was on the phone, but he gave me a smile and a thumbs-up.?
