Over the past three years, Noah’s star had continued its unstoppable upward trajectory, from another season ofSparta,into an edgy indiefilm, then a blockbuster comedy.
And nowThe Contract.It was a good old-fashioned gangster flick, the story of a 1950s Murder, Inc. hit man caught between loyalty to his boss and the girl of his dreams—a mob daughter who had inherited Vegas’s largest casino. Noah’s performance had been exquisite.
AJ wasalsodoing fine. In fact, she had done her high school self proud. She was a staff writer onSaturday Night Live.She lived in New York City. She had an apartment with a dishwasher and a nice boyfriend who emptied it. Yes, these days, life was pretty great.
Yet, all it took was one look at Noah’s shape across a crowded Monday pitch meeting to turn back the clock.
The weeks after filminghad been a blur. AJ found herself back in New York, having been gone for such an inconsequential amount of time that none of her snake plants had died. But she had never felt more like a stranger in her own life.
She and Noah had never officially agreed not to speak—they hadn’t needed to. L.A. had been a fever dream, and they would now resume their resting state of not speaking. Easy enough.
But it wasn’t easy.
After AJ called in sick for the full first week of postproduction, Ian tactfully suggested she recuse herself. “Maybe you should step back as a producer,” he’d said. “You’ve done enough.”
AJ had wanted to fight him on it—this was a huge opportunity. But her relationship with Em was already over; if she kept flaking on Ian, she’d lose him, too.
And she could not face all that footage of her and Noah.
AJ lived the nextfour months with her heart outside her body. It hardly made a dent that Toni had turned UCB into a battleground—it was all AJ could do to hand in her sketches and drag herself to HGTVeach day. Even as she filled her hours, the space between them was shapeless, a dark unlived expanse lit only by Noah’s distant star.
Then, in February, their show was given a name,Into the Blue—a nod to theAstronauticalsintro—and suddenly AJ existed again. She’d found a portal back. They’d have to see each other during promotion. And if the show took off, if they filmed another season…
AJ would face Em, and Toni, and all of it again, if it meant they could have more time.
While AJ had been sobered and frightened by the things Noah had confided in her, it was hard to stay terrified of something she couldn’t see. As their silence stretched on, hope began to creep back in. This couldn’t really be the end, could it?
As if to answer her question, Fox slapped a large, powerful image of Ana and Rho on a BQE billboard visible from AJ’s bedroom window.
AJ finally saw himatGood Morning America,the day of the show’s premiere. She had been chatting backstage with Dave, avoiding Toni’s glares, when a press liaison led Xiaobo and Noah to their group.
He was in a charcoal gray suit with a black T-shirt, his hair a little longer, no doubt forSparta.As their gazes connected, AJ’s heart actually tried to vault toward him. Perhaps he could sense it. His eyes shone as he lifted his hand in a silent wave. AJ lifted hers in a silent wave back.
Then the cast was brought to three risers on set. AJ was placed in the front row. Noah gave her a quick nod, then folded his large frame into the chair beside hers. As he sought a comfortable position, AJ caught his scent, and there was not one inch of her body that didn’t ache to feel him.
But here were the presenters, all pomp and sunshine smiles. They tossed questions to the cast like flowers from a float, but the parade itself was for Noah. He was the true star, the one they really wanted tohear from. That’s what AJ wanted too. She kept her eyes ahead, her expression neutral as she silently worshipped the low notes of his voice.
It’s you.
Then the segment ended, and Noah was summoned for photos. He stood, without sparing AJ a glance. She watched him shake hands with their hosts, the press liaison hovering nearby to extract him.
He was leaving. He was leaving, and they weren’t even going to speak—
Dazed, AJ rose, pins and needles gnashing her leg.Goddamn it,her foot had fallen asleep. As her heels teetered, a large hand reached out to steady her. AJ’s heart seized as Noah grasped her wrist, never pausing his conversation with the anchors.
He held on to her until AJ regained her balance. Then their eyes met, and it was all still there, as if not a day had passed. The moment lasted long enough for his thumb to caress her pulse.
Then the liaison led Noah away, leaving AJ behind with the rest.
The network held thepremiere that night at New World Stages. It was AJ’s first red carpet, and no one had prepared her for the way people just…shrieked.
“WHO ARE YOU?”
“SMILE!”
“ARE YOU IN THE SHOW?”
This last had been belted at AJ while she stood in front of a giant poster of herself. AJ wasn’t offended. This didn’t feel real—the show, the attention, any of it.
