I took a drink of my water as she giggled.
“Oh, stop it?—”
Two women walked over, stopping her mid sentence.
“I knew you looked familiar when we first seen you walk in! Can we get your signature? So many people online are lookingfor you and think you’ve been kidnapped! I can’t wait to post telling them we saw you.”
Solana’s eyes widened. She reached out and took the pen, then the paper, to scribble her signature onto it.
“Please don’t. I’m trying to have a moment to myself,” she said, pleading with the girls.
I topped my bottle of water, a smile no longer in sight because now I knew for sure I needed to know what the hell was going on. Her behavior had always been off than a muthafucka’. The girls were no longer smiling, but now carried worried expressions.
I stood, knowing we needed to go before this brought more attention to Solana. I didn’t know what was happening or who she was. But, clearly, whoever she had been was enough to cause her to shut out that old life.
“We gone head out.” I announced, bringing their attention back to me.
I pulled a few bills from my back pocket, then dropped them onto the table. I held my hand out to Solana, and she took it with glassy eyes. Both girls ignored her wishes and snapped a few pictures of her as I rushed her out of the bar. I stopped at the door of the bar to talk to the bouncer.
“Give me ten minutes to get out of here. Don’t let anyone leave for a minute.”
The bouncer released a sigh like he didn’t want to, but I didn’t give a fuck. I reached into my pocket once again and pulled out a few hundreds, then handed it to him.
“Man, you know shit like that is considered kidnapping right?” he asked.
“I’m not telling yo’ ass to hold them down all night. I’m telling you to make some shit up so I can get my girl out of this bitch with no problems.”
I didn’t wait for another word before making my way to my bike. Solana kept looking everywhere but at me, like she was waiting for something—or someone—to pop out of the shadows. I’d given her space, let her move at her own pace… but that look in her eyes? That was fear. Real fear. And I wasn’t about to keep acting like I didn’t see it. Whatever she was holding back—we were talking about it.
I grabbed her helmet from the storage on my bike. She took it from me without a word, fastening it like she needed it done now. I followed suit, the silence between us thick as I got on and she climbed on behind me. Her arms tightened around my waist, holding on a little harder than before.
That shit twisted something in my chest.
I was supposed to protect her—and somehow, it felt like I didn’t.
The ride back to Rose Haven felt like hours, as if time was in no hurry to make it to the next second. We pulled up in front of Sugar Kissed; I kicked out my stand. Then lifted my helmet. Solana quickly removed herself, almost tripping over her feet to get down. She handed me the helmet as her eyes stayed trained on her feet. Like she couldn’t bear to meet my eyes. Like she feared what would be staring back at her.
I hated to see this unsure version of her. If she just talked to me and told me what the hell was going on. We could’ve avoided all of this, but I couldn’t force her to trust me, or what we were trying to build.
“Thanks for tonight.” She mumbled, then turned to head towards her shop door.
“That’s it?” I asked.
Solana stopped, but never turned to face me.
“That’s all I deserve, huh? You can’t find it in yourself to tell me what’s going on? If that’s the case, why go out with me?” I questioned.
She turned around with a few tears rolling down her cheeks. I wanted so badly to go to her and say everything was going to be okay. That we didn’t have to talk about what happened. But I couldn’t act like what happened didn’t matter.
“It’s not that simple.” She practically whispered.
If the birds and the crickets hadn’t gotten the memo on how serious this conversation was, I wouldn’t have heard her.
“Well make it plain for me Solana.”
“Can you just accept that I’ll tell you when the time is right?” she asked, her eyes practically pleading with me.
I chuckled and looked away. I placed her helmet into the storage on my bike then released the brake. I turned to face her once more before putting on my helmet.
