He isn’t hearing me, all the strength has faded from his body.I put the bottle down and kneel over him.Fuck, fuck, fuck...I try to hold on to him because he’s slumping sideways, but he’s way too heavy.
I pull my pillow over to stop him falling so far and shake him by the shoulder.Gently at first, then harder, but it’s no good.Colin’s completely gone.For a few seconds, I crouch there, paralyzed, before I manage to muster a clear thought.
Stay calm.I have to stay calm.This is the worst case, but if I freak out now, it won’t help Colin or me.Should I check his app?To be certain that his blood-sugar levels didn’t come up enough.That’s only going to happen if he eats something.But hecan’teat now because he’s so low he’s lost fucking consciousness.
OK.Breathe.Calm.One step at a time.
Dad...I have to call Dad.
I glance at my phone—it’s an ungodly hour, but that’s the least of my worries.I listen to it ring without taking my hand from Colin’s face.I can feel the fine film of sweat on his cold skin.He’s not shaking anymore, and that’s doing my head in.
My heart is pounding.
Pick up, pick up, pick up.
Wouldn’t it be better to call nine-nine-nine?An ambulance might get here faster and they could—
“Olive?”It’s the middle of the night, but Dad sounds wide awake.And alarmed.Like he’d just been waiting for the time when I called him like this.“Are you OK?”
“Dad,” I gasp.“You have to come.Please.Colin’s not well.I—”
“What happened, Olive?”he asks in his doctor voice.
“He was drinking.And his blood sugar’s too low.I broughthim food but he was already so low, and now...He just fainted, Dad!”
“I see,” he says.“Are you with him?”
“Yes.”
“Is he breathing?”Dad asks, and my blood runs cold: I have no fucking clue.I stare at Colin’s chest for several seconds until I’m finally certain that it’s rising and falling.
“I think so.”My voice is wobbly.
“Where are you?”
“In my room,” I admit.
Dad doesn’t waste breath on us breaking the rules, which brings it home all the more how serious this is.“I’ll tell Nurse Petra,” he says calmly.“She has a glucagon pen for emergencies, and she’ll come right over.I’m on my way, Olive.Get dressed, open your door, and stay with Colin until Petra gets there, OK?Put him in the recovery position, love.You know what to do.”
“OK,” I say.“Please hurry.”
“I will.Goodbye now.See you soon, kiddo.”
“See you soon,” I whisper, but he’s already hung up.My heart is still pounding as I put down my phone.Colin’s head is drooping, and the silence is driving me crazy.
Everything in me fights against getting up and leaving him so that I can open the door.
For a moment, I consider going to get Ms.Barnett, but then my eyes rest on Colin again.I can’t leave him on his own.I just can’t.
My stomach is a wee ball of fear as I crook his leg, push his arm under his head, then roll him toward me onto his side.Dad made me practice these things so often, but doing this now, forreal, feels like more than I can bear.My shoulder hurts.I never knew how heavy an unconscious person could be.Colin’s hands are ice-cold, so I pull the duvet over him and crouch there, stroking his hair and whispering that help is on its way.That I’m sorry.That I’m sorry for everything I said earlier, and to hang the fuck on in there.
These might be the worst minutes of my life as I count Colin’s every breath.So that I’ll know if they just stop.
They don’t.But he doesn’t react when the light comes on out in the corridor and, just a few seconds later, Nurse Petra appears in the doorway.She doesn’t ask questions, just comes straight to the bed.
She speaks to Colin; he doesn’t respond.
“Can you get Ms.Barnett, please, to show the paramedics the way?”
