“I know.”It always does something to me when Colin Fantino takes my hand, but today, it’s special.I get goose bumps, but luckily, I’m wearing one of his jumpers so he can’t see.I turn my head until my brow is resting on his shoulder, and then we fall silent.I know him well enough that, even though it feels like I didn’t try hard enough, I’m certain I won’t get anywhere with him by forcing him.I can’t make Colin go to Ms.Vail.He has to want it for himself.
I really think psyching yourself up the first time is the hardest part.I basically look forward to my sessions with her now, however tiring they are.Not physically, but emotionally, and not just the time in her office.The real work begins afterward, when I’m sitting in my room, staring into space as I think about what she said.Not that Ms.Vail actually says much.She mainly asks questions, which is irritating, but still better than being told what to do.
Later this afternoon, I spend my whole appointment with her wondering how I can talk to her about something that’s not really anything to do with me.I don’t pluck up the courage until I’ve stood up and got my hand on the door handle.
Ms.Vail looks up as I turn back to her.“Is there something else, Olive?”
“Yes, I...”I hesitate.“There is one more thing.”
“I’m listening.”Ms.Vail smiles.
I take a deep breath.“If you knew someone who’s...under a lot of stress...and you were worried about them, what would you do?”
Nothing at all changes in Ms.Vail’s face but I’m sure she’s running her mind over the list of people I’ve mentioned in our conversation.I hope she doesn’t think of Colin, because I already feel as if I’ve betrayed him by talking about him when I know he doesn’t want me to.
“I’d speak to the person,” she says, “and ask them if they want any help.”
“He doesn’t.Er, that is, they don’t.”
“I see,” Ms.Vail says.“Sometimes people are under so much pressure that they’re not able to take responsibility for themselves anymore.Do you think this person still can?”
OK.I should have expected her to ask something like that.And I know that what I say now matters.If I say no, she’ll want a name, and then Colin will be sat here against his will sooner than he can blink.But I’m not going to lie.Not about something this important.
I pause, listen to my heart, and think about the last few weeks.And then I say, “Yes, I think so.”
“Good.You don’t have to hit rock bottom before you can get help.If this person has forgotten that, I’d just remind them of it.”
“What if they don’t want to hear it?”
“Then I’d try to be there for them, and listen to them.”
I nod.
“And if the person ever changes their mind, I’d offer to come with them to talk to somebody, if it would help.”
“OK, I...Thank you, Ms.Vail.”
“Not a problem.”
I give a brief smile and turn back to the door, but she hasn’t finished.“Olive, if you’re worried that anything’s going to happen, you can always call me.”She sounds serious.“Any time, day or night.We’ll always find a solution, and you’re welcome to tell your person that, if you like.”
27
Olive
I feel like a traitor because “my person” still hasn’t the least idea that I’ve mentioned him to Ms.Vail.It was only a few words, and I named no names, but I still get the feeling Colin wouldn’t be happy if he knew.But I’m not happy that he’s not doing well just now.
I can feel how torn he is, especially on his birthday, and I guess he’d suggested to Cleo that he’d be back in New York by now, at the latest.But he’s not back in New York.He’s here at Dunbridge Academy, and even though he claimed not to want to celebrate, the others organized a midnight party for him.Tori took charge and is calling it the Two Scorpios Party, because my birthday is the day after Colin’s.
She wouldn’t let me help with the plans, so I spend the afternoon at the school newspaper editorial meeting.
“Olive, this is great!”Theresa says for the fourth time after I’ve presented the interviews I’ve done so far.“You can really see how much you’re enjoying this.”
In the old days, I’d have knocked back that idea right away,but I have to admit that it’s true.“I’m glad you like it,” I mumble, lowering my eyes.
“More than like it,” Theresa says.“We totally have to keep you on the team.I’m not letting you go now.”
That actually makes me smile.“If you insist.”
