“I…because…” Because what else would he have done?
“It’s because of me, isn’t it?” Malini said. “You’re a pediatric oncologist because I was sick.”
He didn’t answer.Of course.
She nodded, seeming to accept this fact as part of their lives. “Do you even like being a pediatric oncologist?”
“I do.”
“See, I don’t believe you. How could you know if you like it, if you never ever considered anything else?”
“Malini. What is the point of this line of questioning?” His heart was thudding anxiety.
“My point is that everything you do revolves around me and cancer.” She came around and stood in front of him, her chin up. She was taller than in his mind, but her eyes were just as expressive as ever. “It’s not healthy.”
He shook his head. Whatever. She didn’t understand that there really wasn’t a choice.
She held out her hand. “Hi, I’m Malini Dave. Your sister. I am more than a cancer diagnosis.”
He rolled his eyes. “Don’t be ridiculous. I know you.”
“Do you, though?” she asked. “Do you know who I am if I don’t have cancer? Do you get that I went to college, that I studied even while I was in treatment and graduated top of my class? That I have colleagues who respect me and students who love me? Yes, I am excited to find out who I am without illness, but I am not willing to wait until a test tells me I can. I am going to have a life in addition to and separate from cancer. And from you. You might want to think about that.” She paused. “Not to mention that you should be pissed that I am stealing your favorite kitchen items.”
“The kitchen items are replaceable.” He shrugged.
“Bhaiya.Youare more than my cancer, too,” she said softly, placing her hands on either side of his face like she did when she was little. Her hands were soft and warm. Callus free. As if reading his mind, she lowered her hands to his. “Calluses from working hard to take care of me. I want my own calluses, Bhaiya.”
“I got these from gardening.”
His sister sighed and dropped his hands. “Think about what your life might look like if it’s about more than me being sick.”
He stared at her. Was it true? Was he more than his sister’s cancer? Whenever he looked at her, he did an assessment of her health. Before he saw her smile or heard her voice. She was right. Every time he looked at her, he saw her illness. Which raised the question: Who was he if he let all that go?
* * *
“You’re my friend, and I want you to come to my housewarming party.”
Nimita stared at Malini. “You know I want to be there, but your brother will be there, and it’ll be so awkward.” Nimita wasn’t surprised that Malini knew they’d broken up. A Holi celebration was not exactly a private place to have a huge fight.
“He’s my brother, and I love him, but you are my friend.” She paused. “Like my first real friend,” she said quietly.
Nimita cocked an eyebrow. “Get out of here.”
Malini’s eyes widened. “It’s true. I was sick and—”
Nimita saw her smirk. “That’s cheap, Mali, playing the cancer card.” She shook her head at the young woman.
Malini shrugged, unapologetic. “Hey. It was worth a try. But seriously. I was sick when I was in college, so I didn’t make those lasting friendships. You’re like my first friend who is not a colleague. You help me have new experiences…and plain and simple, I want to share this with you.” She paused. “Don’t make me beg.”
Nimita gave her a withering look.
“Fine. I’ll beg. Please?” She pouted her lip.
Nimita let out a huge sigh. “Fine. Fine. Stop with the pouty lip. I’ll be there. For the party part.”
“Great. But you’ll be coming for the puja part, too.”
“That’s for family.”
