“Allow myself?” As if loving or not loving Riya was a choice he’d made. As if the fact that the one night he’d had with her hadn’t ruined him for all future women. As if right now he wasn’t torn between the fact that he was grateful to her for risking her life to save his, and upset that she’d taken that risk. Not to mention that Hetal was in the hospital because she’d emulated Riya.
He let out a sardonic laugh. “Little sister, I can’thelpthe fact that I’m in love with her. I have loved her since we were children. I will probably never love anyone the way I love her. IwishI didn’t love her. Because I can’t be in love with a firefighter.”
“You wish you didn’t love me? What the hell kind of bullshit is that?” Riya’s gravelly voice came from behind him.
Dhillon’s heart stopped at the sound of her voice behind him. The voice that haunted his dreams and lifted him up all at the same time. He inhaled and turned to face her. Her arms were folded across her chest, one hip jutting out. But despite the anger in her body, he caught the hurt on her face before she could mask it.
“How much did you—”
“I heard plenty.” She shook her head in disgust, but the flash of pain in her eyes broke him. “Youwish you didn’t love mebecause I’m a firefighter? Well,fuck you, Dhillon Vora.”
She fisted her hands by her sides and leaned toward him, her breath coming hard. “I wish I didn’t love you, because it turns out you’re an asshole. I’m no longer a firefighter, but you arestillan asshole.” She turned on her heel and stomped away from him.
“You’re in love with me?” Dhillon called. “Since when?”
She stopped and spun around. “Since always. But that doesn’t matter, because we’ll never be together. You won’t be with me if I am a firefighter. And I won’t be with you if I am not.” She turned to leave again.
“Firefighters die,” Dhillon shouted after her, glancing at Ambrose.
She stopped, her back to him, and turned so he could see her profile. Ambrose watched him.
Dhillon swallowed to ease his throat. He spoke to her back. “That night. The firefighter who stayed to help my dad—he never came out.” Grief clogged his throat. “I found out later that the man had suffered a heart attack right then. My dad must have stayed to help or something—no one really knows the details—but that firefighter died that night trying to save my dad.” He cleared his throat. “I found out his name, looked him up. He left behind a wife and two kids. He risked his life for my family, and he lost.”
She turned her head toward him. Something had softened about her, but only for a moment, and then her eyes turned hard again. “Move on, Dhillon. I’m going to.” She walked out of the room. Out of his life.
Dhillon just stared at the empty space she’d left. What had just happened? How had he screwed this up so badly? How had he just hurt the one person he loved the most? She was completely right. Hewasan asshole.
He turned to his sister. “I really fucked this up.”
“Yes, you did,” Hetal agreed. “Bhaiya, it’s a risk, being a firefighter. It’s a risk loving a firefighter.” She looked at Ambrose, a small smile on her face. Ambrose smiled back at her. “You could lose her—it’s true. But you might not. And if you love her, you also get to be with her for whatever time you have. Isn’t that better than losing her and never even being with her?”
Dhillon listened—really listened—to his little sister and her wisdom. His father’s words floated back to him from that first Rakshabandan.“Never underestimate the power of your sister to guide and watch over you.”
“When did you get to be so damn smart?”
“I learn from the best.” She grinned.
Dhillon raised an eyebrow. “Thank—”
“Mom, idiot. I learned from Mom.” She shook her head as if she were the older sibling. Well, maybe it didn’t matter who was older. She was definitely wiser.
“So, I need to get back to the station. When you’re done here, Doc, stop by.” Ambrose nodded at Dhillon. “I have something I want to show you.”
“I’m good.”
“I’m going to have to insist.” Ambrose leaned down and gently kissed Hetal on the lips. Dhillon looked away. He may not be trying to break them up, but he didn’t need to see everything. Clearly Dhillon was mistaken about many things. Right now, his sister was happy. He was not going to be like his uncle and put anything above her happiness. If things didn’t work out, then he’d be there for her. Like any other older brother.
“I’ll see you later,” Ambrose said to Hetal. He nodded at Dhillon as he left. “See you at the station, Doc.”
thirty-six
RIYA
It was true. Firefighters died. That was why there was a wall at the firehouse that honored the fallen. Their pictures hung there as a reminder of the sacrifices made. A sacrifice any firefighter would make. Including her.
Well, when she’d been a firefighter, anyway.
She strode down the hospital hallways, trying to process what Dhillon had told her. How could she be with him if shewasn’ta firefighter?
