His mother pulled her hand away from his, and furrowed her brow. “Are you still chasing that idea? I would have thought you would have come to your senses by now. You were made to be in politics, Sam. Look at you—tall, good-looking, intelligent, charming. All you need is the right training and contacts.”
Sam breathed deeply. “Mom, I told you, that’s not really what I want. I want to help people. Like we were helped when Arjun—”
“Don’t!” Her voice was sharp enough to throw Sam back. “Don’t.” She sank farther away from him. “Youpromisedme that you would do what he could not. You were on that path until thatgirldistracted you. Since when do you let anything, even a girl, get in the way of your dreams?”
Sam took in the sallow tone of his mother’s skin, the gray in her hair, and his heart broke. The beeping increased as his mother’s heart rate went up. The sound tore at him.
There was no future with Maya—what did it matter what he did with his life? At least this way, he’d be making his mother happy. “You’re right, Mom. I made you a promise and I’m going to keep it. But that means I’ll need to go back to school in New York. That’s where all the contacts are.”
Her eyes lit up and she broke into a smile. “That’s my boy! I knew you would see sense.” She tried to sit up. “Oh, I’m so happy. You are going to make our dreams come true.” She beamed at him, but Sam had the sense that she wasn’t really seeing him at all. And a part of him knew that when she said “our dreams,” she wasn’t really talking about him, either. No matter. At least he’d made one person happy.
CHAPTER FORTY-SIX
SAM
New York, 2013
“ICAN’TBEin the same house as your mother right now.” Sam’s father quickly brushed past him and into the apartment. “I know you have Ben here now, so I’ll just take the sofa.” He set down his suitcase next to the door and turned to face Sam.
“I’m sorry, what?” A pit formed in Sam’s stomach as he digested the dark circles under his father’s eyes, not to mention the tousled hair and unshaved beard.
“You heard me.” His father nodded at the bar. “You still got the good bourbon I gave you?” He plopped himself on the sofa. “Just grab two glasses and the bottle.”
Sam did as he was told, the pit in his stomach growing. What had his mother done now? He settled down in the chair across from his father and poured them each two fingers of straight bourbon.
His father grabbed his glass and, before Sam had even sipped his own bourbon, he downed it. Since when did his father do shots?
Sam’s father reached for the bottle and poured himself another drink. Sam sipped his drink in a deliberate fashion and waited until his father was prepared to talk. He didn’t have to wait long.
“Your mother told me about that check.”
Sam frowned. Why would she tell him? “What did she tell you?”
“She told me that she tried to pay Maya to leave you alone and not to tell you she was pregnant.”
Sam was surprised that she’d told the truth. “That is true.”
“She said that’s why you won’t take her calls.”
Sam shrugged. Had another gulp of bourbon.
“She kept Samantha from me, too.” His dad sighed, a sad, almost helpless thing.
Sam stared into his near-empty glass. “Not just her. Maya participated in that, too.”
His father sipped his drink and settled more comfortably into the sofa. “Maya was young, impressionable. Scared.”
It was Sam’s turn to polish off his drink. He reached for the bottle. “Doesn’t make it right.”
“Maybe not. But sometimes it helps if we understand why.” His father stared him down.
“Do you understand why?”
His father frowned. “Your mother put all of her hopes and dreams for Arjun onto you. She didn’t know how else to handle his death. When that was threatened, she took care of it. She honestly thought she was doing what was best for you.”
“Yet here you are. With a suitcase.” Sam didn’t even try to keep the bitterness from his voice.
“Here I am. She robbed you of a child, and me of a grandchild. Not easy to forgive that, no matter her intentions.” He drank a little more. “But she is my wife. And damn if she doesn’t drive me crazy. I love her.”
