“Yeah, fine. Everything is fine.” His voice sounded forced, even to him. He needed to tell her. “Actually, you won’t believe what happened today.”
“What’s that?” Her eyes grew cautious with concern, as she searched his face.
She already knew that Maya was his girlfriend from his law school days. But that’s all he’d ever told her. That’s all he ever knew. What would he say?So, remember I told you how Maya broke my heart when I was in law school? Well, turns out she was pregnant when we broke up, and she never told me. And I just met my fifteen-year-old daughter.
“I found out...” He paused. Innocent curiosity filled her eyes. This news would rock her world, just as it had his. It wasn’t time. He should wait until Samantha knew who he was. “I found out that there is something sketchy going on in that nursing home my father asked me about.”
“No way!” Paige’s eyes widened as she sipped her wine. “That’s terrible! I know I said it’s a drain on your time, but that needs to be addressed.”
She continued to speak, but Sam interrupted. “How about I order us some sushi, and I’ll tell you all about it over dinner?”
She smiled wide and she was beautiful. He’d tell her later.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
MAYA
New York, 2012
NOTFORTHEfirst time, Maya found the shop stifling. Having her two worlds collide had definitely caused a small explosion within her. How would Samantha even know where to begin a Google search for her father?Sejal!Maya’s cousin in Maryland would have been easy to pump for information. When Maya ended up pregnant, the romantic in Sejal could not understand why Maya wouldn’t tell Sam or why the fact that he was the baby’s father had to be kept secret. Samantha probably only had to ask a few vague questions, and Sejal would’ve offered up more than was necessary without even knowing it.
Maya glanced at the time as she removed her chef’s whites and left the shop to Samantha’s loud mutterings. Whatever. Two hours until that cake needed to be delivered. She would only need one.
The smell of chlorine in the locker room was as calming to her as any balm or yoga class. She changed into her swimming gear and found an empty lane. Goggles over her eyes gave her the sensation of being alone as she sat on the edge of the pool and dangled her feet in the water for a moment. Maya slowly lowered herself into the pool and dunked her head in. The coolness of the water shocked and refreshed her and she pushed off the wall to begin her stroke.
The softness of the water and the familiar rhythm of her stroke cocooned her in comfort. Her breathing calmed as she matched her breath to her stroke. Even as a young girl just learning to swim, Maya had always felt at home in the water. Chlorine had been in everything she owned, and the smell of it on her skin always brought her contentment.
As she finished her warm-up, she pushed herself harder as she started her set. One hundred yards as hard and fast as she could go, followed by one hundred easy yards for recovery, then repeat. She might not be quite as fast as she was in high school, but she hadn’t lost too much. With each stroke, a little more tension was released. Before long, her mind was empty of everything but her swim.
She relished blissful thoughtlessness. But when she paused for the next set, the raucous laughter of teenage boys floated toward her and the past attacked her again. She had spent the better part of the past sixteen years stifling any memory of Sam that surfaced. She was not going to go through all that again. She couldn’t. Time to shut down those old feelings. They had no place in her life right now. She immediately began the next set to push away thoughts of Sam.
It was a losing battle.
Maya was halfway through her sets when she checked the clock. Slow today. She pulled her right arm across her chest in a stretch while she caught her breath. The boys were still enjoying the pool near the high dive. She stretched her other arm. The lifeguard had turned on an oldies station on the radio. The lyrics floated over to her just as she started her next set. It was an old Ace of Base song about a beautiful life. For an instant she caught the mixed scent of cigarette smoke and grass andSam, as if he were standing right in front of her, and her heart ached with the memory.
Unfortunately, the swim had failed to clear her head. Fine. Once Sam made those phone calls and went back to his life, it would be easier to put those memories away for good. For now, images of Sam continued to invade her thoughts. She was still on edge when she returned to her apartment from delivering the wedding cake that Samantha had quite adeptly finished.
It was Friday, the night she and her mother usually cooked together. She found her mother sitting at the kitchen table, looking at old pictures. Maya closed her eyes in an effort to find patience. She inhaled deeply to prep herself and nearly gagged.
“Why do I smell lavender?”
Her mother nodded in the direction of a bouquet of flowers that sat on the table.
“What the...?” Maya marched over to the offending flowers. There was a card.“‘The Colombian roast you suggested was a hit! Best, Leo.’”
“Where did this come from?”
“That man who always asks you out. He brought them by the shop while you were at the pool.” Her mother shook her head. “Samantha went up to my apartment to get away from the smell.”
“I don’t blame her,” Maya muttered. She tossed the flowers in a plastic bag and tied it tight. She hadn’t been able to stomach the scent of lavender since she was pregnant. Interestingly, Samantha had never liked it, either.
Maya gently placed her hand on her mother’s shoulder. “Raju-kaka proposed again today, I take it.”
While Sunita had been in the process of purchasing the bakery, she had needed to go to various suppliers for inventory—baking supplies, ingredients and the like. Not having a car, and not always feeling safe on the subway at night, she met Raju-kakawhen he was her cabbie one night. Their friendship had been almost instantaneous, as they were from neighboring villages in India. After that, Raju-kaka saw to it that he was always available when Sunita needed a ride. Over time, he became an important part of their family in Queens—taking Maya to dance practice or a friend’s house on occasion. When he fell in love with Sunita was anyone’s guess. All Maya knew was that there had never been a time in her new life in Queens that Raju-kaka was not there. In fact, it had been she who gave Raju-kaka the honor of being called “kaka” as opposed to “uncle”—maybe because she hoped in some way that he really was her father’s brother, even though he was not.
He was as close to a father figure as Maya had ever known, and Maya knew he waited for the day that Sunita would acknowledge her love for him, as well. Maya had repeatedly warned him that day would never come—Sunita was too bitter. Nevertheless, he persisted.
Sunita nodded but didn’t look up. Maya picked up one of the pictures. She had seen these many times before. Every time Raju-kaka proposed, in fact. The one in her hand was a yellow-tinged black-and-white image of a much younger Sunita holding an infant. She stood beside a handsome man with a mustache and light-colored eyes. The man was smiling and relaxed, seemingly happy with his little family. This picture used to warm her heart, give her hope. But those feelings had long since been quelled into submission. She avoided looking at the other pictures, but even the fact that they were there caused cracks in her heart.
