That’s why I’ve brought Nico to counseling with me, because I know I’m not the only one struggling.
And that’s why I’m staying with him, even though his father tried to kill me.
In the first few days after everything went down with Luca Caruso, I think Nico was waiting for me to change my mind. He didn’t say anything, but I could tell he was worried. It was in the way he watched me, almost warily, like I might disappear at any moment. It was how he held me as we slept, hugging me close to his chest, like he was afraid if he let go, I might decide to leave.
But I wasn’t going to leave. Not because of something Nico’s crappy father did.
So, after a week of Nico tiptoeing around on eggshells, I sat him down for a talk. I told him I loved him, and that I wasn’t going anywhere. That I truly didn’t blame him for his father’s actions. “I know it’s hard,” I said. “For both of us. But we can do this. Together. As long as you want to.”
Things were better after that. And they’ve only improved since.
I can’t say things are back to normal, because my normal has changed. Instead of quiet evenings alone at home, I spend them with Nico. Instead of burying myself in my work, circumstances forced me to take a break from it. And my circle of friends has expanded from some casual acquaintances and my sixty-two-year-old mentor to include four intimidating but secretly sweet former Delta operators.
It’s funny, I thought my old normal was fine. Satisfying. If I’d been asked, I would have even said I was happy. But I feel a bit like Dorothy entering the Land of Oz—before, everything was colored in shades of gray. But now, my life is filled with a rainbow of colors. And I like it. A lot.
“So,” Nico prods, “the appointment with the realtor? I’ll go with you?”
Oh. Right. The appointment.
Shaking free of my wandering thoughts, I lean over from my stool to kiss Nico’s cheek. “I appreciate you offering. But I think I need to do this on my own.”
He frowns, but quickly hides it. “Are you sure, Soph? I don’t mind.”
“You have to get to work yourself,” I reply. “Going to the appointment and then breakfast after will put you way behind.”
“I don’t care.” Nico cups my cheek. His hand is warm and soft, with the slightest hint of roughness to it. “You’re more important than work.”
It would be so easy to say yes, just like I’ve done all the other times I’ve left the apartment over the last month. In the beginning, the very thought of leaving the safety of the Fox & Falcon building, with its top-notch security and highly-vetted guards, made me break out in a cold sweat. And when I finally felt brave enough to venture outside, when Nico insisted on coming with me, I gladly accepted.
“It’s completely normal to be afraid,”my counselor said. “And there’s no need to push yourself right away. Take baby steps. Just go outside at first. Then to the corner. Then two blocks. If you feel better bringing your boyfriend with you, that’s okay.”
But it’s been a month. And even though I’m still nervous about leaving, I’m determined to do it on my own. To prove Elio didn’t win. That I’m stronger than him.
Sliding off my stool, I move between Nico’s legs. Holding his shoulders, I lean in to kiss him, first just a light press of my lips against his, then harder. More passionate.
Nico’s hand comes to my back, pulling me closer. He nips at my lower lip, then strokes his tongue across it. He teases my mouth open and dips inside—caressing, exploring, and tasting.
With his free hand, he tunnels his fingers through my hair. He tips my head back and takes our kiss even deeper. Need blossoms inside me like a spark catching fire, starting at my center and radiating through my body.
My core squeezes, convulsing around nothing, desperate to be filled.
Nico makes a rough, needy sound in the back of his throat. He tugs me closer yet, so I’m flush against his body. His erection pokes at my belly, hard and insistent.
I grip the back of his neck, my nails lightly scratching his skin.
My nipples tighten. Each time they brush against Nico’s firm chest, frissons of electricity arc through my body.
I’m seconds from leaping on him, ripping open his pants and taking him right here, when common sense prevails.
The appointment. At nine AM.
You could skip it,my inner vixen suggests.There are plenty of other places in the city. And you don’treallywant to go byyourself yet, do you? Maybe this is a sign to give yourself more time.
But it’s a nice space. The best one I’ve seen in my price range. There’s a good-sized reception area, if I ever hire an assistant, an office with a window,anda private bathroom. Plus, it’s five blocks from Fox & Falcon. Nico could stop by after work. Or I could go there, and we could hang out on the rooftop deck when the weather allows.
And I need to prove to myself I can do this.
Decision made, I drag my lips from Nico’s. Apologetically, I say, “My appointment with the realtor is in half an hour. If I don’t leave now, I won’t make it in time.”
