“I’m just… your descriptions of me are on fire.”
“I am pleased,” he says as he sets my bare ass on the bathroom counter. It’s cold and I’m not quite sure this is where I’d like my bare ass at this moment, but he’s aiming a toothbrush laden with toothpaste at me. I reach for it until he pushes my mouth open and starts brushing my teeth like he’s acquired a child that doesn’t know how to properly brush.
“Stooop!” I laugh out while I try to get the toothbrush from him. I’m still halfway wearing my shirt like it’s some kind of cape and feeling absolutely ridiculous as he dodges my hand, determined to brush my teeth. I’ve hooked his arm with one of mine and am trying my hardest to pull the toothbrush free.
“I will do everything you ever ask of me,” he says, like I’m not asking him to relinquish the toothbrush.
I snatch the toothbrush and give him a look. “Besides carrying me to bed!”
“I have carried you with finesse,” he says. “I even skipped unclothing you.”
“I see that as my bare ass sits on the counter. Very sanitary.”
“If that ass can sit on my face, it can sit on the counter.”
I try not to choke on the toothpaste with that one. He just stares at me as he watches me brush my teeth, and all the while I question what I’ve done to acquire such a strange man.
Once we’re both done, he scoops me off the counter and carries me to bed.
“See? You asked me to carry you, so I carried you.”
“I see that,” I say. “Very romantic.”
“I’ve always been a romantic. Speaking of romantic, what would you like for Christmas?”
I slowly look over at him. If our one-month anniversary present was a house… what the fuck does he think he’s going to get me for Christmas?
“Should I just tell you the things Idon’twant?” I ask.
“If you’d like.”
“I do not want you to buy me another house. One is plenty.”
“Okay.”
“I definitely do not want a diner.”
“Are you sure? That was just going to be like a stocking stuffer.”
“A diner isnota stocking stuffer. Do not buy me any stores, or really any building at all.”
“Not even a cat café?”
“Definitely not a cat café. Liam, I’d take one look at those pitiful cats and bring them all home.”
“You are never allowed in a cat café again,” he declares as Butter makes his entrance. He waddles right toward Liam, who is already grimacing. And then since Liam is lying on his side and not his back, he struggles to climb onto Liam’s side, which is proving rather hard to balance on.
“Buddy, you can lie on me,” I say, pulling the cat onto my chest. He shoots off it like I’ve set him in a tub of acid and continues to try to climb on Liam. He somehow succeeds andloafs on Liam’s side with aplomb while his tail twitches back and forth and his rusty purrs fill the room.
“You can’t tell me that noise is healthy. Its life is short, right?” Liam sounds hopeful.
“Another reminder that he is not anit.His purrs are strange because of his smooshed face. He’s either Persian or half, and that face has made it hard for him to breathe like a normal cat.”
Liam just stares at Butter, who slow-blinks his love back at him.
“Back to my list. It istooearly to ask me to marry you.”
That gets a glower out of Liam. “How sure are you?”
