‘Duty calls.’ He leaned in and kissed her gently on the cheek, let go of her hand and went to take Elio into his arms.
It was an odd moment.
Here she was, on her birthday, surrounded by her family, yet feeling, in so many ways, like an outsider, as if she had been put on a path when she’d taken up the scholarship that had made her travel in the opposite direction to her family. Remy had remained at the heart of it, walking to Milton Road Comprehensive every day and singing her way through her teens with Tony by her side, but that hadn’t been possible for Ashleigh. She’d had no choice but to try every day to prove she was entitled to wear the blazer for the place she had taken by deceit. The ripples were still felt far and wide, even here, today, on her fiftieth birthday, when her dad was so very proud.
‘Are you having a nice time?’ She hadn’t heard Riccardo approach, and started.
‘Yes! Lovely, thank you! Elio is wonderful.’
‘He really is. Hard work, but wonderful! He’s a clever little thing.’
‘Takes after his mumma!’ she joked.
‘Oh, no doubt! She wants a drink.’ He reached for a Diet Coke.
She smiled at the young man who had slotted in so well with the family, as if he had been there forever. An architect, who was smart, patient, and adored Sophie in a way that, Ashleigh knew, had made putting her daughter’s hand in his on their wedding day far easier for Remy than it might have been. Midge had remained stoic and calm as Riccardo had given his speech, pledging to always love and respect his new wife, and there’d not been a dry eye in thehouse. Including Jamie and his girlfriend Daina, who had been part of the proceedings. True to Riccardo’s word, he had encouraged Sophie to follow her fashion dreams and was keen to tell anyone who would listen about his wife’s incredible couture business, with a keen eye on sustainability, that she operated out of her flagship store and workspace in Spitalfields.
It had made her wonder about Evie’s wedding day, if and when it came, trying to imagine how it would be with her, Archie, and Leni all in attendance. That was the thing. Unlike her dad, who could simply not say his name to make Archie disappear, she was stuck with him, replacement wife and all.
Remy shimmied her way across the kitchen. ‘Happy birthday!’ she called, clearly high on life.
‘Yep, happy birthday!’ Ashleigh raised her glass.
‘Isn’t it great to see Tony? Can you believe he’s here?’ Her sister’s tone was one of pure delight.
‘It’s really great.’
‘What did you say it like that for?’ Remy’s face fell.
‘Like what?’ She was unaware of anything other than trying to sound joyful.
‘So flat! Like you’re fed up, or ... or angry!’
‘Not everything has to be fun and roses, Rem! People are allowed to be a bit pissed off or a bit thoughtful!’ she snapped.
‘Yes, but not on their birthday,attheir birthday party, on a lovely, special day!’
‘Jeez, that’s exactly what I’m talking about! It doesn’t have to belovelyand special!’ She decided to get some fresh air and made her way out into the back garden. Remy followed her.
‘What’s wrong, Ash? Where has this come from? You were fine earlier. Tell me.’ Her concern was touching.
‘Nothing. Ignore me. I’m just ...’ She didn’t want to have to explain it all to Remy, who was clearly having a ball.
‘Just what?’
‘I don’t know.’ Ashleigh felt the full effect of her sipped wine on her fuzzled thoughts. ‘I’m just not in the mood for making out everything is great!’ There, she’d said it.
‘Do I do that, Ash? Try and make out everything is okay when it’s not, is that what you’re saying?’ Remy sounded hurt, and this in turn hurt Ashleigh; she could hear the slight slur of prosecco on her words.
‘Don’t overthink it. We all do it, don’t we? The small lies of communication that paint a picture. I mean, you and Midge are always, just ... perfect!’
‘We are, yes! We are perfect! It’s not a front we put on. We arethathappy, because we work at it, and I’m sorry if it bothers you! Jesus!’ Her sister shook her head.
‘Well, good for you. Iwantyou to be happy! I want things to be wonderful. All I’m saying is that I can’t tell you how many timesIsay I’m okay when I’m not,’ she admitted.
‘You think that’s what I do?’ Remy stared at her. ‘You have no idea! I am happy! I am!’
‘All right! No need to shout at me!’
