I’d received the kiss I’d dreamed of my whole life on the night I announced my engagement to someone else.
Maybe I could fling myself into the bay. Let the water carry me away. I knew they were guarded about their past, their association with the Tritons. I never should’ve tossed that in their face. Yet I longed for what we’d experienced right here with my whole soul. I wanted more, not this brief moment in time. These were the type of sparks I’d begun to believe I’d never experience. The sense of fate playing a winning hand for once.
I turned to stare out at the bay, the darkened waters glimmering. Some days, when I looked out at those depths, they were inviting. Others, they were as distant as the stars above.
I clutched tight to the rail, the events of tonight threatening to bring me to my knees. From encountering my nightmarish parents, from Arielle’s dashed promises, from the brief, tremulous hope that unfurled while kissing Ursuline—only to have it dashed away.
When my parents had first broken the news to me that I’d be marrying Frederick’s daughter, I thought I’d been desolate.
But that didn’t compare to the reality.
Tonight, I’d tasted what true bliss could be, and in the aftermath, I’d gotten a taste of ruin.
Chapter 13
Ihadn’t seen Ursuline since the night of the engagement party.
In fact, as if spending that much time with surface dwellers had exhausted the Tritons, I hadn’t seen a single one of them since either. Not even my fiancée, which struck me as odd, considering Arielle liked living on land. If it weren’t for the members of the staff, I’d have thought they’d all but abandoned this place. Even still, I’d started out lonely, and ever since that night, the ache had grown in intensity.
I applied a few more brush strokes to the canvas, reveling in the feel of those perfect colors meshing on the canvas. This piece I’d started the night Ursuline had kissed me. The silhouette of a kiss, but inside the darkness formed, an array of reds, blues, and purples, all competing for dominance, threatened by the splashes of black on the space. Even though I’d poured those emotions out into the piece, they still dwelled in me, as ever present as a heartbeat.
I finished the last stroke I was working on and pulled away from the canvas. I’d been here the whole day, focusing onthe things I could control rather than everything that spiraled beyond me.
At least through this pain, I’d created more art than ever. Though that could also be because I had unhindered access to supplies for the first time in my life. No painting in secret or stealing away to Jason’s.
I wiped my hands on my ratty, paint-splattered jeans and then brought the brushes and palette over to the sink to wash. The usual scents of cleaner bloomed in the air as I washed my brushes off, the paint bleeding into the sink.
A thunk sounded from the upper floor, which drew my attention. It might’ve been Jacques or Maribella or Kendra. I’d made friends with Reiliana this week too, as well as Gerald, both of them on the serving staff. They’d all been overwhelmingly kind, which surprised me given the lukewarm reception I’d received from the Triton family.
Maybe because their employers were only here on occasion. The job probably wouldn’t be as unbearable as working for people like my mother and father, who lobbied a different complaint against a different staff member each day of the week.
I finished washing my brushes and stepped out of the room to investigate. My stomach rumbled in response, in a reminder that I hadn’t eaten anything yet today. And a fair amount of the day had passed.
Maybe that was what my parents had meant when they told me I needed to focus on reality. But when I sank into a piece, everything else melted away. Time grew immaterial.
I strode out of the room, making sure my footsteps were quiet. I wanted to see what I was walking into rather than diving in. Everyone was so secretive in this place, and I thirsted for any scrap of knowledge. When I stepped closer to the kitchen, the voices drifted my way.
“He’s escalating.” Jacques’s voice rang out loud and clear, and I slowed to ensure I didn’t give myself away. “The bay’s been busier than normal.”
My stomach flip-flopped as I crept to the edge of the doorframe.
“Shh, we don’t talk about that,” Maribella hissed at him.
“They’re down below for the week,” Jacques said. “Cleanup needed in their kingdom.”
“I don’t know how they can keep that contained,” Kendra said. Everyone had congregated in the kitchen. My palms sweated. I wanted to ask what they were talking about, but the second I appeared, they’d clam up. Even though they were friendly and kind with me, I was attached to the Triton family, whether I liked it or not.
“They won’t,” Jacques said. “Not for long.”
“Are you thinking of leaving?” Maribella asked.
“I’ve looked around,” he said darkly. My blood chilled. What was the Triton family involved in? All I knew was that they made their riches in the orichalcum business, but I’d never be able to visit New Atlantis to investigate. Only sparing and carefully crafted information reached the surface.
Maybe I shouldn’t be complacently painting in this estate while I knew nothing about the family I’d be marrying into. Arielle had made it clear she put loyalty to her family first and foremost, and she didn’t seem to care to dig. What I’d mistaken as a similar parental disapproval between us at first, I’d fast realized wasn’t the case. Frederick adored her, and she didn’t seem dissatisfied with her lot in life. She was plenty happy to skate upon the surface.
I lost my grip on the doorframe, and a second later, I plunged into view.
A gasp escaped Kendra, and the cluster of her, Maribella, and Jacques by the kitchen island separated at once as they all put distance between each other.
