But we’re casual, right? He doesn’t need to know absolutely everything about me, does he?
I’m about to type my own response when my phone starts ringing. I answer right away.
“Hi, Faye, it’s Dina.”
“Hi.” I pause. “It’s nice to hear from you. Is everything okay? Is Rachel okay?”
“She’s fine. Sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you. I just thought I’d check in to see how you were doing after the other day? It was quite intense, wasn’t it?”
“Yeah, you could say that. But I’m doing okay. Thanks for asking.” I push back in my desk chair. “How are you coping with it all?”
“I don’t know where to begin,” she says. “But when we were in the room with Mum, you asked her if you had a twin. I’ve been thinking about that a lot.”
“You have?” I ask.
“Yes, and honestly, the thought has unsettled me. I’ve been an only child all these years. My mum is living her last years, and I suppose I’ve made peace with not having any family. I’m not married and I don’t have kids, but now I have a brand-new sister and maybe even two. So all of this has come as a shock.”
“I can understand that,” I say. “I’m sorry if it’s been difficult for you.”
“It’s not your fault,” she says. “It’s Mum’s fault. She’s the one who never told me about her past.”
The resentment is clear in Dina’s voice. I don’t blame her, but I don’t blame Rachel either. This is a difficult situation for everyone involved and I don’t think there are any villains here.
“I’m sure Rachel had her reasons for giving me away,” I say. “I’ve forgiven her for it.”
“Mum was a good person,” Dina says. “I don’t know what happened but I’m sure it was hard for her.” She sighs. “But I suppose we’ll never really know for sure what the circumstances were.”
I pause before I share what I’m thinking. “If it makes you feel any better, the twin theory is looking unlikely.”
“Really?”
“The caseworker at the adoption agency didn’t find any evidence of siblings. I think the most sensible explanation is that I’m just struggling with my dementia.” This is the first time I’ve said this out loud and an unexpected tidal wave of emotion hits me, and tears fill my eyes.
“I’m so sorry, Faye,” Dina says. “This must be so hard.”
“Thanks. Sorry. It’s been an intense week.”
Dina snorts. “You don’t have to tell me that! Wow.”
We share a laugh, and then I say, “I’m so glad I found a sister. That’s really all I wanted. I think, perhaps, being adopted can make you miss something, or someone, that you never met. I’ve missed you all these years.”
“Now you’re going to make me cry!” she says.
We chat for another ten minutes or so and it feels easy. We are both traversing new ground, each working out how to relate to the sister we never knew we had. It’s a comfort to know that I have Dina. I was never going to find this fictional twin I conjured from nothing, but instead I have a real living and breathing sister, right here in my life.
CHAPTER 22
FAYE
I’m running late and Alistair is on his way. I’ve invited him over for dinner but I haven’t a clue what I’m going to make. I’ve been so busy writing my memoir that time has completely run away from me. Ever since chatting to Dina on the phone, the burden of my past has lifted, hefted out of my way. I have been on a creative roll, eager and empowered to share my life story now I have a clearer idea of how it all began.
I look at myself in the mirror as I pull on a navy-blue wrap dress and buckle the straps of my gold heels. I’m still applying lipstick when the doorbell rings.
I open the front door to find Alistair standing there in a hoody and jeans, holding a large paper bag. “I brought dinner to us.” His smile is lopsided and sweet. “I probably should have called and warned you but?—”
I grab hold of his hoody and pull him in for a kiss. “You’re a lifesaver.”
His free hand bundles up my hair at the nape of my neck, pulling me in for another kiss. When we break apart, he holds my hand and we walk into the house, almost forgetting to close the door behind us.
