Brad leaned back, rested his elbows on the arms of his chair, and steepled his fingers. “She’s adamant she didn’t, and in my encounters with her over the past week, I didn’t pick up anything to indicate she’s lost one iota of mental acuity or become forgetful.”
“Sometimes that sort of thing can come on suddenly in older people. Plus, it’s not like you see enough of her to give you a baseline comparison.”
“True. But Cara’s spent hours with her, and she said Ms. Boyer is as sharp as she is.”
“So it’s Cara now.” Larry ambled in, speculation sparking in his eyes.
“That’s what she told me to call her.” He kept his tone conversational. “She says only her students call her professor.”
“Uh-huh.” Larry dropped into the chair across the desk. “She’s a pretty woman.”
This wasn’t a conversational tangent he wanted to follow.
But changing the subject too abruptly would only feed his deputy’s interest.
Best plan? Play this low key and casual.
“Yes, she is.”
“She married?”
“That hasn’t come up in our conversations.” But he’d bet a week’s salary she wasn’t.
“You could find out.”
Brad stifled a groan.
For months now, Larry had been dropping subtle and not-so-subtle hints that he should reenter the dating scene. And nothing so far had dissuaded him from his mission to beef up his boss’s social life.
Brad mulled over his strategy.
Maybe he needed to be more direct instead of brushing off these types of comments with a simple “not interested.”
He rocked forward and linked his fingers on the desk. “For the record, I’m not planning to take another walk down the aisle. Ever. I’d appreciate it if you’d stop trying to nudge me that direction.”
Larry considered him. “Can I be honest?”
“Depends on how much you value your job.” He was only half joking.
“I’ll take the risk.” Larry crossed an ankle over a knee, his relaxed posture at odds with the intensity in his eyes. “The truth is, Elizabeth wouldn’t want you to spend the rest of your life alone, mourning her. I knew her. She wasn’t like that. She was full of life and joy and believed in living each moment as fully as possible. Nor would she want you to blame yourself for what happened that night.”
Stomach knotting, Brad clenched his fingers tighter.
He couldn’t argue with anything Larry had said.
But there was more to the story.
“I’m not going to disagree with your take on Elizabeth—but what happened that nightwasmy fault.”
“Sorry. Not buying.”
Anger coiled up inside him. “How can you say that? You weren’t there. I was. I know every detail.”
“You weren’t there at the moment it happened. So you can’t know every detail.” Larry uncrossed his legs and leaned forward. “But I know you—and I know how much you loved Elizabeth and Jonathan. I also know that wallowing in guilt and punishing yourself for the rest of your life isn’t going to bring them back. If you have amends to make, make them with God and let the past go. Focus on today. Elizabeth would want you to make it count ... and to fill it with joy.” He stood. “Here’s my two cents. If the opportunity comes along to findlove again, don’t add passing it by to your list of regrets. See you on patrol.” He gave a mock salute and disappeared out the door.
Brad remained in his chair, staring at the blank wall across from his desk.
The wall that used to hold a photo of him and Elizabeth and Jonathan ... until looking at it every day became too painful and he’d relegated the beaming trio to a closet at home.
