I think it’s time for a break.
I abandon the cutting board and drop down into a chair at the kitchen table, absently rubbing my eyes, which are still stinging from the onions.
When I hear a fragment of what sounds like conversation, I look up.
Nazeera is staring at me.
“Did you say something?” I ask her.
“Yeah.” She smiles, but her eyes are concerned. “I said,are you all right?”
“Oh.” I run a hand through my hair. “Sorry, I didn’t hear you.”
I stare out the window as a bone-deep fatigue settles inside me. Cold sunlight gleams over the quiet afternoon. Only a few people dot the sidewalks, some pushing strollers. A dog barks. A single car drives by. Wind pushes through the big tree in the front yard, and I stare at its shifting branches as my heart continues to race.
I glance at the clock.
Warner is supposed to be here for a meeting in about half an hour, and the closer we get to the appointed hour the more impatient I become. Pressure keeps building in my head.
I can’t seem to get myself under control.
I startle at the sound of wood shifting against wood. Nazeera pulls up a chair, sits down.
“You never answered my question,” she says.
I turn to look at her, but I’m distracted by a shaft of light beyond her head, dust motes suspended like insects in amber. “What?”
“James,” she says.
“Yeah?”
“Look at me for a second.”
I meet her light brown eyes, drum my fingers against my thigh. “I’m looking at you.”
“Maybe you should go for a walk,” she says.
I shake my head. “I went for a run earlier.”
“You already hit the gym?”
“Twice.”
“Did you eat anything?”
“I had a protein shake.”
“That’s not enough food,” she points out.
I push up in my seat, thinking I might try to chop that potato again, then sit back down. Then glance at the clock. “I’m not hungry.”
“Not hungry,” she says, raising her eyebrows. “Sure. Okay.”
For a minute, we both stare out the window in silence.
Finally Nazeera says, “Kind of a strange time to decide you want to learn how to cook.”
I glance at her, but she’s still staring outside, her eyestracking a bird. I return my gaze to the window, feeling suddenly subdued. “Yeah,” I say. “Well.”
