She’d lately been trying to understand her burgeoning hesitations toward Kamran, and the more she interrogated her feelings, the more she’d begun to wonder whether it was,in the end, less that he’d wounded her vanity and more that he hadn’t respected her mind. Certainly she didn’t expect him to exchange his every thought and opinion for hers – but her fears and concerns should’vematteredto him. They should’ve mattered at least enough to give him pause. To warrant a discussion.
It bothered her that they hadn’t.
“I’m not displeased to see you,” she said, and meant it. “In fact, I’m truly happy to see that you’re well. I know how much you’ve suffered these last several weeks, and I can imagine it hasn’t been easy for you.” She hesitated. “It’s only that… I suspect our book has closed, Kamran.”
He seemed stunned by this response, his chest lifting slightly as he breathed. “I see,” he said.
Alizeh looked into her lap, then glanced at Hazan, whose expression was inscrutable. She realized then that she had no desire to continue this conversation, for not only was it intolerably awkward, but there were a thousand things she’d yet to accomplish.
She stood up at once.
Kamran leaped forward to help her, taking her hand as she tried not to trip on her train. Alizeh steadied herself with his assistance, then stared at their clasped hands in a dizzying moment of disconnection. She wasn’t repulsed by Kamran, not even a little – in fact, he radiated warmth and strength, and smelled of something rich and honeyed that beckoned her. It was only that it seemed strange to her that she’d once kissed him – had once nearly swooned in his arms. The memory of that moment seemed to belong to a different girl,a different life.
Was it possible she’d been but a servant then? And a queen now?
She drew back her hand, shaking out her skirts before collecting her crown and veil. “Hazan, how might I return to the palace?”
He stepped forward at once. “I’ll call for the carriage, Your Majesty. It shouldn’t be but a moment.” He moved briskly toward the door, but then, glancing at Kamran, he paused. “Unless you’d wish to accompany me?”
“Yes,” she said, brightening. “I’d like that.”
“Please, Alizeh,” Kamran said quickly, drawing forward. “Might I have a moment alone with you?”
Alizeh hesitated. She was just opening her mouth to speak when Huda’s head poked through the open doorway.
“Oh! Are we allowed to come back in –” Her words died when she spotted Kamran, her smile turning brittle. “Ah. I see the prince has arrived.”
Kamran stiffened at the sound of her voice, his mood darkening as if he’d been doused with cold water. He turned to her slowly, his eyes flaring with hostility. Alizeh marveled at this brief, heated exchange, wondering what, precisely, had happened between them in her absence.
Huda had failed to be specific.
“The prince is here?” Omid’s voice preceded his body as he reentered the courtyard, his eyes gleaming when he spotted Kamran. “Sire! You’re back! Did you have any trouble with the –”
“What have I said to you,” Kamran said sharply, “about closing your mouth?”
“Right,” the boy said quickly, his ears turning red. Then, “Oh, and sorry about the water, miss,” he said to Alizeh. “Miss Huda told me not to interrupt your conversation with Hazan, so I didn’t bring it, but if you’d like –”
“Not necessary,” said Deen, entering the courtyard with a flourish. He was holding a metal flask, which he eagerly pressed into Alizeh’s hands. “This will do the trick nicely.”
“Thank you,” she said, unscrewing the cap. Delicately, she sniffed the contents, then fought back a wince. “You said this wastea?”
“In a manner of speaking.” Deen grinned triumphantly, and Alizeh realized that in the brief time she’d known him, she’d never seen Deen smile so much. “It’s a warm brew of lotus root, crushed sapphire, river water, a bit of saffron, and just atouchof frost.”
“Frost?” She stared at the flask. “Do you mean ice?”
“A specific strain of magic,” he said, shaking his head. “I’ll spare you the tedious details, but I’ve been working with the palace alchemist on a number of new elixirs. I must say, I’ve never studied under such a talent before and the experience has beenenlightening. I’m hoping to publish my findings when we return home.”
“How wonderful,” she said, breaking into a smile. “I’m so happy for you.”
“Go on, then, take a drink” – he beamed – “I usually recommend it as a sleeping draught, but I think it’ll settle your nerves nicely.The effects are fairly immediate.”
“Oh,” she said, clasping the bottle to her chest. “Would it be all right if I saved it, then? I’m eager to return to the palace, and need to have my wits about me – but a sleeping draught might be lovely for later.”
He bowed his head slightly. “As you wish. Just be sure to tell me how you like it in the morning.”
“Yes, of course, I –” She startled, then, at the press of a hand against her waist. She turned. It was Kamran.
“Would you allow me to accompany you back to the palace?” he said, looking at her with an intense focus. His eyes – one gold, one brown – were a disorienting kind of beauty. “We could share a carriage.”
