Not just sometimes, Riley! Now, tell me what you’re talking about!
“It’s just—well, what if another opportunity never comes?”
This is a very good question. Now I understand that sometimes there is no later, that the opportunity in front of you is the only one you’re guaranteed. I rest my head on Riley’s foot to let her know I’m still listening.
“I know it’s a big bookstore chain, and that comes with a whole corporate culture that maybe isn’t the best fit for me, but I feel like I might be able to make it work,” she says softly. “I wouldn’t be on the floor anymore, but itisa manager role…oh, Harold. I wish this could be easy.” She stands andglances around. “Miguel told me I should look elsewhere, but I don’t want to leave. I love this place, and I guess now that I might not have the option in the future, I feel like I need to make things right with Brenna. An apology’s a start, but it really wasn’t fair for me to break things off with her so abruptly without telling her how much I was suffering. So, I think that’s what I want to do next. And doesn’t what I want mean anything?”
Riley? Leaving? Absolutelynot.I rise and press my torso against her, hoping to remind her that she’s as much a part of Lakeside as any of us. What would the store even be without her?
It wouldn’t. Forget JMB and the stupid event that should’ve been for Fiona all along. If Riley’s not here to help our customers buy way more books than they ever intended to and be thrilled about doing that, we’re truly doomed.
“It just sucks, Harold,” she says. I don’t look away when she gazes at me; her eyes remind me of my mother’s, though it’s more of a feeling than an actual memory. “At least I don’t have to decide immediately. They said I can take my time. Hopefully Miguel will figure things out before then. I believe he can. I just hope he figures out how to believe that, too.”
She stops talking because Miguel’s just come trudging out of the stockroom.
“You good, Riley?” he asks. “You’ve got a look on your face.”
“I’m fine,” she says so flatly that it’s like she hopes he hears she’s lying.
His eyes follow her gaze to the Romance section, and I know—I justknow—he’s thinking about Fiona. “Take the job,” he says flatly.
A nervous laugh escapes Riley’s mouth. “Pardon me?”
“I’m aware that Borders offered you the manager position,” he says, and her head whips back. “You should take it. I’m sure Brenna told you that they’re good people over there. Or at least she would if you asked her, which you should.”
“How on earth did you hear about that? I haven’t toldanyone.Even Dane.”
He shrugs in an attempt to be casual, but I can tell it’s taking him effort to even have this conversation. “It’s not a big industry. Lamar and I went to school together, and he called to make sure I wouldn’t be upset if they hired you.”
Riley balks. “I didn’t put you on my reference sheet for a reason.”
“A good reason, no doubt. But you don’t need to worry—Itold him you’d be perfect for the gig.”
“Why?” she asks, horrified. “Youwantme to leave? Do you even care whether I want to go?”
“Of course I do,” says Miguel, slipping his hands into his pockets. “I’m telling you to go precisely because I care about you. Like we talked about last week, you could run this place in your sleep. And I’m never going to be able to compensate you for that, say nothing of your nonexistent job security.”
Riley’s rapid blinking tells me she’s on the verge of crying. “You’re saying I asked for too much?”
“No, Riley. If anything, you’ve never asked for enough. I owe you so much. We all do, but especially me—we wouldn’t have survived without you while Amelia was sick, and then…after. But I’m afraid you’ll regret it if you don’t take the job.”
“If I regret something, it’s not pushing you on romance earlier.” Her voice warbles. “Sales are up, Miguel. If you can find a way to get us through the next month or two, we could survive.”
“Romance isnotgoing to save us.”
“It already is.”
His expression shifts from empathy to irritation. “Maybe it’s helping, but I don’t know how to get us through the next couple months, and I’ve already tried every single thing I can think of. I’ve emptied my savings account and badgered banks from here to Marquette. I went on a ridiculous cat-and-mouse hunt in Chicago. I tried to make amends with Amelia’s parents when I would have preferred to have someone stick a hot poker directly into my spleen. I’m not sure what more you want from me.”
“I want you to keep trying!” she cries. “It’s not over yet, so stop acting like it is!”
He rubs his forehead for a moment, then says, “I understand how you feel. I really do. But this is in your best interest. You’ll make more money and have a better life if you go work at Borders.”
A single tear escapes the corner of her eye. I whimper and rub myself against her leg, but for once, she doesn’t reach down for me. “That’s it?” she asks him quietly. “After all I’ve put into this place?”
“Riley, I’m incredibly grateful for everything you’ve done. But you have a bright future ahead of you—you’ll probably run your own store someday or do something even better, like get out of here and go see the world.”
“And if I don’t want to?” she says, wiping her cheek with the back of her hand. “I’ve seen a lot of the world, Miguel. What I want to see now are the people and places I already love. You should understand that more than anyone.”
